Insecure
Carla the Poet Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Feel my lower self is taking over, here's the floor
Take me back to days where I could barely speak and more
Crushing on my lover never hurt so much, I'm sore
From working on this love I have for self, see now I'm torn
What do you want
Brewing up a storm
Feeling like a pawn, I'm the muse of my art
Can't take no L's or loss
Lessons learned through heart, All I could think is
This is settling, here's the jealousy
Then there's never be, where you want to be
Breathing fallacies, choose your destiny
Who you gonna be, what do you want
I thought you wanted to be my best-friend
I thought you loved me
I feel amazing, I ain't gone chase it
Just grace them, my presence breaking
Grounds in the basement
No fading away, I gave them a way
I'm paving
They ask for the fade, I tape them
You ain't gone gauge me
Breakthrough, breakthrough
Breakthrough
Where my freedom
Feeling boxed up
Dream of cash filling pockets as my body throbs
Been heavy lately questioning every mention
I'm not feeling any extension from the arms attention
I've been craving anything anything and everything
To the side of me lays all my urgencies to wedding rings
Terrified of sleeping and dreaming clouded fears of things
This is settling, here's the jealousy
Then there's never be, where you want to be
Breathing fallacies, choose your destiny
Who you gonna be, what do you want
I thought you wanted to be my best-friend
I thought you loved me
I feel amazing, I ain't gone chase it
Just grace them, my presence breaking
Grounds in the basement
No fading away, I gave them a way
I'm paving
They ask for the fade, I tape them
You ain't gone gauge me
Breakthrough, breakthrough
Breakthrough
It don't even matter, I just skip the chatter
Under-wraps in batter, Eat it for the moment
Climb back up the latter, take the trip to Saturn
Keep the lesson after, I wasn't ever hopeless
I thought you wanted to be my best-friend
I thought you loved me
I feel amazing, I ain't gone chase it
Just grace them, my presence breaking
Grounds in the basement
No fading away, I gave them a way
I'm paving
They ask for the fade, I tape them
You ain't gone gauge me
Breakthrough, breakthrough
Breakthrough
The song "Insecure" by Carla the Poet explores themes of self-doubt, insecurity, and the struggle to find one's own identity and purpose. In the first verse, the singer expresses the feeling of being overwhelmed by their lower self, the part of them that lacks confidence and self-assurance. They long for the innocence and freedom they felt in the past when they were more comfortable expressing themselves. The pain of being infatuated with someone intensifies their insecurities and leaves them feeling torn. The lyrics suggest that the singer is working on developing self-love and acceptance, but they still feel conflicted and unsure of themselves.
The second verse delves deeper into the singer's feelings of insecurity and the desire for validation. They dream of material success, imagining money filling their pockets and providing a distraction from their doubts. However, the attention they receive from others doesn't bring them the fulfillment they seek. They yearn for something deeper and more meaningful, symbolized by the urgency for wedding rings. The fear of sleeping and dreaming indicates the presence of anxiety and the potential for nightmares or negative thoughts to consume their mind.
Overall, "Insecure" captures the internal struggle of someone grappling with their insecurities and the pressure to conform to societal ideals. The lyrics convey a longing for acceptance, love, and self-discovery, while also recognizing the need to break free from external expectations and embrace their own path.
Line by Line Meaning
Feel my lower self is taking over, here's the floor
I can feel my insecurities and doubts overpowering me, and I'm giving them space to express themselves
Take me back to days where I could barely speak and more
I long for the simplicity of the past when expressing myself was easier
Crushing on my lover never hurt so much, I'm sore
Having deep feelings for my lover is causing me emotional pain and discomfort
From working on this love I have for self, see now I'm torn
I'm struggling with conflicting emotions while trying to cultivate self-love
What do you want
I'm asking myself what my true desires and aspirations are
Brewing up a storm
There is a storm of emotions and thoughts building up inside of me
Feeling like a pawn, I'm the muse of my art
I feel insignificant and manipulated, yet I find inspiration in my own experiences
Where's the sauce
I'm searching for that special something that makes me stand out
Can't take no L's or loss
I refuse to accept failure or defeat
Lessons learned through heart, All I could think is
I've gained wisdom through personal experiences, and it's all I can think about
This is settling, here's the jealousy
I feel stuck and dissatisfied with my current situation, and envy plays a part in it
Then there's never be, where you want to be
I fear that I'll never reach the place I desire
Breathing fallacies, choose your destiny
I'm surrounded by falsehoods and illusions, and I must make choices that shape my future
Who you gonna be, what do you want
I'm questioning who I want to become and what I truly desire
I thought you wanted to be my best-friend
I believed you wanted a deep, meaningful connection with me
I thought you loved me
I believed you held strong affection for me
I feel amazing, I ain't gone chase it
I feel incredible, and I won't go after fleeting and ephemeral feelings
Just grace them, my presence breaking
I will gracefully confront the situations and people that try to bring me down
Grounds in the basement
I'm building a strong foundation in the depths of my being
No fading away, I gave them a way
I won't disappear or lose myself; I've left a path for others to follow
I'm paving
I'm creating my own path and opening doors for myself
They ask for the fade, I tape them
When others try to diminish or erase me, I prove them wrong and leave a lasting impression
You ain't gone gauge me
You won't be able to accurately judge or measure my worth
Breakthrough, breakthrough
I am experiencing a significant moment of progress and discovery
Where my freedom
I long for a sense of freedom and liberation
Feeling boxed up
I feel restricted and confined
Dream of cash filling pockets as my body throbs
I have aspirations of financial security and success, but it consumes me physically
Been heavy lately questioning every mention
Lately, I've been weighed down by doubt and overthinking every little thing people say
I'm not feeling any extension from the arms attention
I don't feel any genuine connection or support from the affection I receive
I've been craving anything anything and everything
I've been yearning for any form of fulfillment and satisfaction
To the side of me lays all my urgencies to wedding rings
Next to me, I have all these intense desires and needs for committed relationships
Terrified of sleeping and dreaming clouded fears of things
I'm scared to sleep because my dreams are filled with unclear anxieties and worries
It don't even matter, I just skip the chatter
None of it really matters; I ignore the unnecessary noise
Under-wraps in batter, Eat it for the moment
I hide my emotions with a smile, consuming distractions just to get by momentarily
Climb back up the latter, take the trip to Saturn
I will rise above my struggles and explore new heights of self-discovery
Keep the lesson after, I wasn't ever hopeless
Even in the midst of difficulties, I hold onto the lessons learned and remain hopeful
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid
Written by: Carla Brown, Connor Burnett
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Carla Kyoku
♪ Join my Discord server: https://discord.gg/gqmkZCkjAc
🎶time stamps🎶
♪ 0:00 When The Fat Girl Gets Skinny - Button Poetry, Blythe Baird
♪ 2:55 Prom Queen - Beach Bunny
♪ 5:07 Starving For Attention - The Narrative
♪ 9:45 idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish
♪ 13:09 Anorexic Beauty - Pulp
♪ 16:04 Strawberry Shortcake - Melanie Martinez
♪ 19:09 Better Than Me - The Brobecks (slowed)
♪ 24:02 Body Terror Song - AJJ
♪ 26:40 Misery Meat - Sodikken
♪ 27:44 Alien Blues - Vundabar
♪ 30:19 I Deserve to Bleed - Sushi Soucy
♪ 32:03 Mrs. Potato Head - Melanie Martinez
♪ 35:39 Body - Mother Mother
♪ 39:08 brutal - Olivia Rodrigo (slowed)
♪ 41:45 I’m not Pretty - JESSIA
♪ 43:42 Mirror - Chase Goehring
♪ 46:54 Pretty's On The Inside - Chloe Adams
♪ 51:06 Scars To Your Beautiful - Alessia Cara
Flame Epidemic 🐷👑
@Introvert hi! Recovering ana here! My best advice is tons of water i mean a lot of it. Eat 3 times a day with 20g of protein each meal and healthy. Also exercise at least 30 minutes preferably walking. Youll eat less than you think. I actually had to start planning my meals bc i wasnt hungry mostly due to water and scheduled meal times.
Oh also multivitamins are important and if you can get some vitamin and mineral shakes! I also want to eat more when im lacking in something.
Also if youre still worried about overeating then choose healthy breakfasts linches and dinners you know can make that wont be too many calories. I always just round my meals to 500 calories so as an example my breakfast 2 eggs (200 cals), yogurt low-fat 60 calories, nuts 160, fruit, 100 ish depending. Now some totals are rounded up to 500 but its close enough the difference being barely enough to matter.
I find that eating healthy and not having to check calories and just instead treating it as something that i just do (like brushing teeth) helps a lot so i tend to watch tv to distract myself a lot and avoid food thatll make me bloat.
Hope this helps!
hope
This is a vent lol <33
Tw - Sh
I started to sh myself a little before the school year ended. This is the first time that I’ve openly talked about it to people, because nobody knows. My best friends make fun of me for having a flat chest after I’ve asked them to stop. I’ve done everything to have the perfect body. I only eat one meal a day. Sometimes I don’t even eat at all. I hate all of my clothes, but my parents never actually bought me clothing I like. I have to buy things I like with my own money, like $50 shoes. Btw, I’m 12. I have been staying up till 5-10am. My arms constantly have sh scars, so I’m always nervous that my friends or family would see.
I don’t think a kid at my age should be going through shit like this, but that’s just how messed up the world is.
Sorry for the rant, have a great rest of your day / night everybody !
Peaches_N_Cream13
I’ve listened to this for quite awhile but never commented.
“when I was little, someone asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up and I said, small”
All of us wider set girls grow up with this subconsciously ingrained in us, or at least I did. Not even fat girls, but taller, broader shoulders, wider built, just larger girls. we all watched such petite, tiny girls be the standard. the envy of all. all the small girls that guys could pick up and put in their pocket. the weak small girl that is perfect.
It’s one of those things that isn’t directly in the forefront of your mind. Just growing somewhere in the subconscious. Growing up, hoping to eventually be that small. Hoping that one day you will wake up and be a size 0 that guys could throw around and finally be wanted.
Then, one day you do, wake up and realize that your shoulders will never reduce. your hips will not deflate. your legs will not get any shorter and you will not shrink 8 inches.
no matter how much weight you lose, your silhouette will never be “small”.
I realized that *dying* to be small is one of the most true unspoken ideals I’ve had since my youth.
Falling in love with this vision of a perfect woman that I could never, ever reach and as a result, having to deal with the self hatred and disappointment of not becoming that every time I caught a glance of myself in a mirror.
Hating your body, not feeling like a woman, not feeling like a human, not feeling normal.
It’s a massive hurtle that has been growing since you just “wanted to be small” when you were small, and no one saying anything. no one telling you otherwise. congratulating you for having such good goals or laughing at the child aspiring to be nothing more than the picture of an “ideal” woman.
I don’t know, maybe no one will read this, or maybe no one will relate to me. If you do relate to this, and somehow found this comment, I just have one thing to say to you.
It is and will be an uphill battle to see ourselves as a beautiful woman or anything but a mistake. It will take a lot to finally see ourselves as someone worth more than just having a “better body”. to open our eyes one day, to wake up, and instead of aspiring to be small, we will desire a meal, a career, a family, or anything in between. we will desire a life, instead of the obsessive modification of our silhouette.
I haven’t made it there yet, but I’m still growing.
Make peace with your younger selves who only saw your appearance and appeal in others eyes, because only once you do that can you begin seeing more.
I love you all, and I believe we can be more than “small”.
Ems
tw for calorie counting + possible ed
When I was 7 or 8, I saw my shadow silhouette in the bathroom. From there on, I was set on how I viewed my body for the longest time.
I'm genetically underweight. I was always thin. I was always smaller than everyone else. I always was told that I was too thin and I took pride in it. Yet, my mirror said otherwise. I never thought I was pretty enough, so I thought that I should make up for it with my body. Whenever I looked in the mirror, I was always fixated on the small things: The way my armpit fat looked, my non-flat stomach, and my legs. I hated my legs. Compared to my body, they were bigger and had more fat. I didn't like how my thigh gap looked either.
When I was 9-10 and saw I weighed 78 pounds, I broke down. I thought that I was too heavy. If I knew what I knew now, I would've just loved myself a little more. All of a sudden, small things said would bother me. Hearing from my parents I was too heavy to carry gave me enough motivation to skip breakfast for a week. Compliments on my weight wouldn't do anything better for me. Whenever I was told I was too skinny and needed to eat more, it made me want to lose more weight. I don't even know why. Maybe it's because the way they viewed my body isn't the same as how I view it or how my mirror shows it. I started considering those compliments as pity remarks to make me feel better, but they never do.
By age 11-12, calorie counting became normalized to me. I started to believe 1,000 a day was too much. Whenever my family ate out, I would always look for something under 500 calories. Somedays, I would only eat 200 calories. The moments I viewed myself as pretty was when my stomach was empty and went my ribs were showing under my skin. The one thing that would stay on my mind was always "why eat less when you can just not eat at all?"
One day, I vomited out my food after a meal. I liked how much it felt afterwards, I did it again a week later. And the week after that one, then twice a week, then three times a week. Suddenly, It was slowly normalized for me.
Whenever I was in public, I would look at other people's legs and compared them to mine. It got worse to the point where I was looking at the legs of fictional drawn characters and wondering what they were doing that I was doing wrong.
I think the reason people beat themselves up for their insecurities is because they feel that they did something wrong for them to end up like that. The reason I always hated myself for my legs was because I thought I did something to end up like that. No matter how less I ate or how much I worked out to change them, my view on them got worse. I knew what I was doing was unhealthy, yet I continued.
I've been trying to recover, eating more often, but the damages of crying naked in my bathroom while cinching my waist with my hands were done. Eating has become harder for me. I know I'm probably not anorexic but I'm sure that if I was, my mom would be disappointed. Whenever she saw this behavior, she would talk about my weight, saw it was for attention, and that I wanted to be like an anorexic.
If you finished reading this, I just wanted to thank you. I think if anyone else read this, they would think this for attention, but I feel that this is a safe enough place for me to share this. You didn't need to read this, but you did, and I'm thankful. If you know a way to recover from this behavior, please tell me. I'm too scared of telling my parents because I caused enough problems for them and I'm sure they would invalidate this as attention seeking. Thank you and love yourself. That's something I should've done in the first place. <333
{Nicky}
Hello you beautiful person<3
Now, I do not know how you feel nor if you have eaten or not but I wish you all the fucking best.
I know that feeling and I'm still not proud of myself but when I read comments like yours, I just need to say this:
I'm very proud of you
So so so so proud. I hope that you are doing better <3
You will push thru it! Love you Honey
♡︎yuki's lounge♡
im just gonna say this. society is fucking messed up. they expect you to around wearing stripper outfits, with an hourglass figure cause that whats beautiful. i wrote this poem for anyone who feels down.
You Are Perfect The Way You Are
Original Poem By Hikari
Written for anyone, who feels unwanted, or depressed.
Please, don’t do any type of self harm. If you ever feel suicidal, or like you wanna disappear, please talk to someone you trust.
People come up to me in the hallway and start teasing me,whispering about me, and start mimicking me.
But these are just rumours.
Because bullies say “You’re ugly.” as a joke, but they don’t know how much it actually affects the person it's being said to.
They call you fat, because you are a bit overweight.
THEY CALL YOU UGLY BECAUSE THEY ARE JEALOUS.
You are fat they say.
You are ugly they say.
I wish I had this confidence through my elementary school years.
Because I suffered through that time period.
And don't make fun of me for saying this.
Because in the end it's true.
You call me annoying, and stupid.
But that’s who I am.
The more I cry the more I realize I'm wasting the tears on some nonsense.
The more I want to wear makeup.
The more I realize that's not me.
The more I realize I can fit in without any makeup.
I hear whispers, behind my back speaking about me.
And I'm sad like anyone else would be.
Girls wear things that show their chests and bellies.
Just to fit in.
I say why don't boys like me.
Because I'm not skinny like the other girls??
Because I don't wanna look fake??
You don't have to do plastic surgery for people to like you.
You don’t have to fit in with the trends and have the most beautiful face.
You don’t have to wear nasty things to fit in.
You don’t have to be considered hot to be popular.
You don’t have to be ashamed that you wear glasses, and get straight As’ because in the end you're correct.
Don’t listen to people who call you a nerd for being smart.
Society says, have big butts, big b00bs, that's how you’ll fit in.
But that's not who people really are.
People can fit in without makeup or cuss words.
People CAN fit in.
But Society doesn’t accept that person because they’re black.
Society doesn’t accept that person because they’re asian
Society doesn’t accept that person because they’re DIFFERENT.
Society is stupid.
Society says to say cuss words and wear nasty things to fit in.
Society is lying.
The Person who wrote this, wants YOU to know that you don’t have to change for anyone.
The Person who wrote doesn’t want you to make the same mistake they made; to change for the wrong people.
To go into the wrong crowd, with people who will hang out with you, and make you think they’re your friend, but ditch you the next day when they go into the popular crowd.
Don't change yourself for anyone.
Because remember.
You are perfect the way you Are.
This was written with pain and suffering that i had(my personal experience)
I think, that you are amazing and gorgeous and I hope this poem helped you.
or made you smile at least.
keep smiling!
you're absolutely beautiful.
your smile is-
wow
im at a loss for words.
your smile is absolutely hypnotizing-
have a great day reader!
-hikari
유나 💗
TW: Ed, Vent
+ small success story<3
I’ve always been heavier than most kids. I’ve had a ED since I was 9 you here NINE. I have been told I’m over weight because I’m tall not because I’m fat. I really don’t believe them. Honestly I used to and still do starve myself. I have gotten better I definitely have.
You see ive always wanted to be a Korean idol since I was like 10. I don’t have a fast metabolism so I gain weight really fast even from my eating a tiny bit. I feel its not like that as bad as it used to be but I still have it. I do lots of diets still but I’ve been more healthy about loosing weight. I do, do some somewhat dangerous diets but at the same time I’ve never really eaten a lot. But I’ve found ways for me to loose weight health yet it doesn’t help at all..
Carla Kyoku
♪ Join my Discord server: https://discord.gg/gqmkZCkjAc
🎶time stamps🎶
♪ 0:00 When The Fat Girl Gets Skinny - Button Poetry, Blythe Baird
♪ 2:55 Prom Queen - Beach Bunny
♪ 5:07 Starving For Attention - The Narrative
♪ 9:45 idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish
♪ 13:09 Anorexic Beauty - Pulp
♪ 16:04 Strawberry Shortcake - Melanie Martinez
♪ 19:09 Better Than Me - The Brobecks (slowed)
♪ 24:02 Body Terror Song - AJJ
♪ 26:40 Misery Meat - Sodikken
♪ 27:44 Alien Blues - Vundabar
♪ 30:19 I Deserve to Bleed - Sushi Soucy
♪ 32:03 Mrs. Potato Head - Melanie Martinez
♪ 35:39 Body - Mother Mother
♪ 39:08 brutal - Olivia Rodrigo (slowed)
♪ 41:45 I’m not Pretty - JESSIA
♪ 43:42 Mirror - Chase Goehring
♪ 46:54 Pretty's On The Inside - Chloe Adams
♪ 51:06 Scars To Your Beautiful - Alessia Cara
Róża Komisarek
Where Orange Juice?
Orsolya Csintalan
@SP Moran i wish you the best 🤍
sugi yono
@rae oh im dying too then
babycarrot
"what do you want to be when you grow up?" "Small"
That literally hits so hard, I'm crying
Loki Rucca(ST)
That's all ive ever wanted
Michał Michalik
Oh God...
Claire Alldredge
Seriously though. People say i'm beautiful, I just wish my body dysphoria would let me believe them.
No Signal
Skinny...
No Signal
Skinny...