Borrowed Time
Checkmark Lyrics

Broken dreams I'll follow mine
I will pursue my own dreams despite them being shattered.

To the end of my borrowed time
I will continue striving until the limited time I have.

I've been walking down this road too long
I have been on this path for an extended period.

Got my bags packed and I hit the door
I am ready to leave, fully prepared.

Then I make a stop at the liquor store
I find solace and strength in alcohol.

'Cause my will is weak but my whiskey is strong
Although I lack strong determination, alcohol gives me temporary strength.

Yeah, through the fights, drama, and heartbreak yeah the winter is cold
Despite enduring conflicts and emotional turmoil, the coldness of winter symbolizes the hardships.

I put my faith in the forgiveness every sinner is owed
I believe in the notion that every sinner deserves forgiveness.

Flashback when we was teens just beginning the road
Reminiscing about our teenage years when we embarked on our journey.

Before the lights, camera, and action and the glittering gold
Before the fame, attention, and success that come with glittering wealth.

Before the Caine spots, before the overdoses and aimed Glocks
Before experiencing the dark sides of life, such as drug addiction and violence.

Before my name popped, before the Navigator raindrops
Before my name became known and before facing challenges and setbacks.

Before I started back with the bad habits I can't stop
Before I relapsed into destructive habits that are hard to quit.

I said I'd keep going, told you I can't stop
I promised to persevere and withstand any obstacles.

And that's what made me who I am but it did us in
Although my resilience shaped my identity, it also caused the downfall of our relationship.

You can never see through the clouds my head is in
It is impossible for you to understand the thoughts swirling inside my mind.

I was sick and got addicted to my medicine
I became unwell and dependent on substances that were meant to heal me.

I was a prick, I kept on kicking till they let us in
I behaved unpleasantly, persisting until we were given an opportunity.

And once they let me in the door it was war
Once I gained entry, a conflict ensued.

With the world I was sure couldn't go back to before
I believed it was impossible to return to our previous state.

Ever since we were kids they said we shouldn't mix
Since childhood, others warned us against being together.

And at the end we broke something that we couldn't fix
In the end, we permanently damaged what we couldn't repair.

And it all just slips away
Everything gradually falls apart and disappears.

I'm a man among boys that avoid their own truths
I stand out among those who evade facing their own realities.

Always down to hang out, afraid of their own noose
They are always willing to socialize but fear facing the consequences of their actions.

No phone booth, can't change an ugly face
There is no magical solution to transform an unattractive appearance.

Tough stand tall then we duck when we gotta chase
We act tough, but when faced with pursuit, we shy away.

Making up excuses but it's all useless
Creating justifications, but they are ultimately futile.

When I blame you for the damage that my youth did
I attribute the harm caused by my youth to your actions.

Throwing up the deuces, easier to run away
Making the gesture of goodbye, choosing to escape is simpler.

Knowing that the rain's always followed by a sunny day
Understanding that after hardships, brighter days will come.

But a vaca's just a break from reality
A vacation is merely a temporary escape from the real world.

Chasing a fallacy back then you're mad at me
Pursuing an illusion, back then you were angry with me.

Casually acting like we don't see the elephant
Nonchalantly pretending that we are unaware of the obvious issue.

In the room but our friends all see the hell we been through
Our friends observe the struggle and hardship we have experienced.

And we know a truce is irrelevant
We understand that peace is no longer achievable or meaningful.

Rip my heart out of my body, there's still a skeleton
Even if my heart is broken, the essence of who I am remains.

My skull and bones represent a throne
My head and body symbolize power and authority.

I'mma stand strong when I move on, holla at me
I will remain resilient when I progress, acknowledge my strength.

I used to have nothing at all but my word and my balls
In the past, I possessed nothing except my honesty and courage.

It's the same thing that took me from nothing dog
Those same qualities propelled me from having nothing.

All around the globe till they asked what the f**k is wrong
Travelling extensively until people questioned my troubles.

What's wrong is everything is real in these f**king songs
The truth and raw emotions are embedded in these songs.

Sometimes I was it was an image to hop out of
At times, I wished I could escape from the public image.

And back into, maybe a gimmick to rock crowds with
Return to an alternate persona, perhaps a strategy to entertain audiences.

But it's all the truth and it's something I'm not proud of
However, it is all genuine, and I feel ashamed of it.

Everything I've done but I can't just opt out of
I cannot simply choose to abandon the consequences of my actions.

The pain I have caused, the Caine, the chopped powder
The suffering I inflicted, the drugs, and the cocaine.

The blame belongs to me, this game is not ours though
I am responsible for the blame, but this game does not belong to any of us.

Maybe from the dirt then the flowers grow
Perhaps, from difficult circumstances, beauty can emerge.

Up amongst the weeds since a youngster greed
Surrounded by negative influences since I was young, driven by greed.

Agreed with every need that I need and so the speed
I justified and embraced every desire I had, resulting in fast-paced actions.

Will eventually just not be fast enough for me
In time, even my current speed will fail to satisfy me.

It's kind of crazy, once upon a time I was just my momma's baby
It's somewhat absurd how I, at one point, was solely my mother's child.

Look at how this ice cold winter when it made me
Observe how the harshness of winter influenced and shaped me.

When it when it gave me icy cold demeanor, meaner
When winter provided me with a frigid and harsh attitude, making me more aggressive.

Wifey throws me out, I love her, I need her
My wife evicts me from our home, despite still loving and relying on her.

What else can I do except go drink another liter?
What other option do I have other than drowning my sorrows in alcohol?

I'm not a follower, I've always been a leader
I do not conform to others; I have always been independent and leading my own path.

I wish I had some inspirational speech to read you
I desire to possess a motivational message to impart to you.

But I don't, I'm just a failure
However, I lack that ability; I consider myself a disappointment.

Worshiped like I'm Jesus by some but look at this cross I'm nailed to
Some idolize me like I am Jesus, but they fail to see the burdens and struggles I bear.

And it all just slips away
Despite everything, it all continues to fade and vanish.