Bell began to concentrate on solo work after leaving Big Star, recording demos at Ardent Studios and Shoe Recording in Memphis with old friends including Richard Rosebrough, Terry Manning, Bill Cunningham, Ken Woodley, and occasionally Chilton and Jim Dickinson. During the late 1970s, a few of Bell's pop song lyrics began to evince influences from his newfound interest in Christian spirituality. He worked at his father's restaurant as he grappled with clinical depression. Although he released the single in 1978, none of his solo material was released on a full length album during his lifetime.
Bell died in December 1978 when he lost control of his small Triumph sports car, sometime after 1 a.m. on the morning of the 27th, on his way home from Ardent Studios. The car struck a wooden light pole on the side of the road, killing him instantly. His funeral was held the next day, December 28th, the birthday of former bandmate Chilton.
Bell's music and that of Big Star became popular with alternative rock musicians in the 1980s through word of mouth. Well known artists including R.E.M. and The Replacements began touting the recordings of Big Star as significant works. Finally, almost 14 years after his death, the songs from his Car Records single and several of his other 1970s recordings were released on 1992's I Am the Cosmos full-length CD on Rykodisc.
I Am The Cosmos
Chris Bell Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
"I am the cosmos,
I am the wind"
But that don't get you back again
Just when I was starting to feel okay
You're on the phone
I never wanna be alone
Never wanna be alone
Wanted too much to say no, no,
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Never wanna be alone
I hate to have to take you home
Want you too much to say no, no
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
My feeling's always happening
Something I couldn't hide
I can't confide
Don't know what's going on inside
So every night I tell myself
"I am the cosmos,
I am the wind"
But that don't get you back again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I never wanna see you again
Really wanna see you again
The lyrics of Chris Bell's "I Am The Cosmos" are a reflection of the singer-songwriter's inner thoughts as he struggles with loneliness and the longing to reconnect with someone he cares about deeply. The opening lines, "Every night I tell myself, 'I am the cosmos, I am the wind,'" reflect Bell's desire to feel powerful and in control, but the following lyrics reveal that this self-affirmation is not enough to overcome the pain of being alone. Bell expresses his vulnerability and need for companionship, conveying his feelings in lines like "Wanted too much to say no, no" and "My feeling's always happening, something I couldn't hide."
The chorus of the song emphasizes Bell's ambivalence towards the person he's addressing. He expresses his desire to see them again, singing, "I'd really like to see you again, I really wanna see you again," but also admits, "I hate to have to take you home, wanted too much to say no." These conflicting emotions reflect the love and pain that often come hand in hand in relationships.
Overall, "I Am The Cosmos" is a poignant exploration of isolation, longing, and the contradictions of human emotion. The song is a beautiful example of Bell's poetic lyrics and emotive vocals, marking him as a talented and influential musician.
Line by Line Meaning
Every night I tell myself,
Every night, I try to reassure myself
"I am the cosmos,
"I am the universe,
I am the wind"
I am the forces of nature"
But that don't get you back again
But that doesn't bring you back to me
Just when I was starting to feel okay
Right when I thought I was getting better
You're on the phone
You call me
I never wanna be alone
I never want to be by myself
Never wanna be alone
Never ever want to be lonely
I hate to have to take you home
I'm upset that I have to take you back home
Wanted too much to say no, no,
I wanted you too much to say no
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
My feeling's always happening
My emotions are always present
Something I couldn't hide
Something I couldn't keep to myself
I can't confide
I can't reveal
Don't know what's going on inside
I don't understand what's happening inside me
So every night I tell myself
So every night, I try to reassure myself
"I am the cosmos,
"I am the universe,
I am the wind"
I am the forces of nature"
But that don't get you back again
But that doesn't bring you back to me
I'd really like to see you again
I would really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I really want to see you again
I never wanna see you again
I never want to see you again
Really wanna see you again
Really want to see you again
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: CHRISTOPHER HAMILTON BELL
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
@Samurai-ss5qs
Every night I tell myself
I am the cosmos
I am the wind
But that don't get you back again
Just when I was starting to feel okay
You're on the phone
I never wanna be alone
Never wanna be alone
I hate to have to take you home
Wanted too much to say no, no
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Never wanna be alone
I hate to have to take you home
Want you too much to say no, no
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
My feeling's always happening
Something I couldn't hide
I can't confide
Don't know what's going on inside
So every night I tell myself
I am the cosmos
I am the wind
But that don't get you back again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I never wanna see you again
Really wanna see you again
@gregorythomas5804
Ode to delusion... excellent
Every night I tell myself 'I am the cosmos, I am the wind'
But that don't get you back again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really wanna see you again
I never wanna see you again
Really wanna see you again
@guidototh6091
No one, except Chris Bell, sounded like this in 1975. 15-20 years later hundreds of musicians sounded like this. He was way ahead of his time.
@SB-se7vb
Well stated.
@demonofdeath2020
why so painful and true !!! you didnt have to state such a deep true !!!
@forgottengrooves6073
True, except he recorded this in '78.
@guidototh6091
@@forgottengrooves6073 It was released on a small label in 1978 but the song and rest of the albums was recorded in France and Memphis in 1974-1975.
@forgottengrooves6073
@@guidototh6091 Oops, my mistake; thank you for the correction 👍
@marcosandrada4239
One of The Best Songs Of the Whole Universe !!!!! Chris Bell is Singing with Jesus and God and is spreading Joy for Us !!! Love U Chris Bell Forever !!!!!!!!! Thank You!!!!!!
@RyanDowningMusic
If this song doesn’t play at my funeral, don’t even bother carrying my casket to the chapel/grave. I won’t rest peacefully. It’s my only wish for my end of it all.
Chris was an absolute genius. So sad that he and Big Star both couldn’t find a good label to support them.
@jdustan
yep.. no distribution.
@johnbigbooty
Ryan, make the drive up to Memphis and let's eat at the shrine. At Mortimer's.