Quiz Show
Clifford T. Ward Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows.

And our final contestant tonight comes from . . .
Where was it again you said you come from?
An well, it doesn't mater
Let's make him welcome shall we folks?
Right, here we go -
A number of questions -
You provide the correct answers in the allotted time
And you win a lovely prize.
Are you ready?
Yep.
Who is the Prime Minister of England?
Ah, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who replaced Terry Wogan on the radio?
Ah, that's a suave, slick Scotchman.
I wouldn't leave him alone with my missus, I know that.
In a sentence, what is the basis for modern thinking in society?
Star Trek is it? Oh I love the black doll in that show.
What does anaphobic mean?
Oh now, that's lucky: I learnt that this morning:
It's a hatred of -er- foreign women isn't it? Ooh, I can't understand that
I love women wherever they come from - they're all nice aren't they?
Who wears a blue uniform and is always there if you need help?
Mother Theresa?
What is a surrogate mother?
Ooh, that's my missus.
She ain't got two ha'pennies to rub together come Wednesday.
What is the role of the quiz show?
Cheese was it? No, no, I tell a lie. It was ham in mine.
I can only accept your first answer - sorry.
Who is the Queen of England?
Oh, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who is the leader of the opposition?
Oh that's a woman for sure, it's my missus.
What's the meaning of the word 'horrendous'?
A bad woman is it?
What's the capital of Italy?
Oh I know that, it's -er- Nipples - I - I mean Naples.
Name the four counties in the United Kingdom.
This is easy - England, Scotland, Wales and London.
In a sentence, what do you know about the SDP Liberal Alliance?
Oh, is that the one my missus goes to where they do flower arranging
And -er- make wicker baskets and things?
Oh, there's some nice women there.
Who is Shirley Williams?
Oh, she goes there does she?
Oh yes, she's good at the flower arranging, so my missus tells me.
Who had a hit record with the song 'Wuthering Heights'?
Val Doonican is it? No, no, I know it's a woman though.
Who or what is Dow Jones?
A womaniser is he?
What does Danny La Rue do?
Oh, she dresses up as a man - is that right?

Well, you've done very well. Wendy, bring on the prizes.
Now which would you like to take home with you
The computer, the TV, the video or the holiday for two in Majorca?
Ooh, I'll have Wendy can I?
I've seen 'em do that on the Tele - you know,
The girl brings on the prizes,
And they say "I don't like the prizes, I'd rather have the girl".
Alright, you've won Wendy, off you go the pair of you.
Thank you for being a marvellous contestant.
Let's hear it for 'em, shall we?
Put you hands together and give them a big round warm of women -
I mean applause.

I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
Don't you love the quiz shows?
I know you love the quiz shows
The BBC knows you love the quiz shows
And all the independents know you love the quiz shows
America taught us to love the quiz shows.




I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows.

Overall Meaning

The song Quiz Show by Clifford T. Ward is a satirical take on the obsession with quiz shows in society. The lyrics depict a contestant being asked a series of questions ranging from basic general knowledge to more complex political and social topics which they are not able to answer correctly. The contestant's lack of knowledge and the absurdity of their answers highlight the pitfalls of relying on quiz shows as a source of information and education. The chorus repeats the line "I know you love the quiz shows" which implies that despite the shortcomings of quiz shows, people still enjoy and indulge in them.


The use of humor and sarcasm in the song is an effective way to critique the influence of quiz shows on society. The exaggerated and nonsensical answers provided by the contestant highlight the dangers of seeking information solely through entertainment. Further, the line "America taught us to love the quiz shows" suggests that the influence of American culture and its emphasis on entertainment has led to the popularity of quiz shows in other countries.


Overall, Quiz Show is a clever commentary on the influence of quiz shows on society and the dangers of seeking information through entertainment.


Line by Line Meaning

I know you love the quiz shows
The singer is aware that people enjoy watching game shows.


And our final contestant tonight comes from . . .
The host introduces the final contestant.


Where was it again you said you come from?
The host asks the contestant where they come from.


An well, it doesn't mater
The host dismisses the importance of the contestant's response.


Let's make him welcome shall we folks?
The host invites the audience to cheer for the contestant.


Right, here we go -
The host starts the quiz.


A number of questions -
The host reminds the contestant of the rules of the game.


You provide the correct answers in the allotted time
The host explains that the contestant must respond correctly within a specific time frame.


And you win a lovely prize.
The host reveals that the contestant can win a prize for playing the game.


Are you ready?
The host asks the contestant if they are prepared to begin the quiz.


Who is the Prime Minister of England?
The host asks the first question, testing the contestant's knowledge of current affairs.


Ah, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
The contestant responds to the first question incorrectly.


Who replaced Terry Wogan on the radio?
The host asks a second question.


Oh, that's a suave, slick Scotchman.
The contestant responds to the second question incorrectly, but with humorous commentary.


What does anaphobic mean?
The host asks a more difficult question.


Oh now, that's lucky: I learnt that this morning:
The contestant responds correctly to the difficult question.


Who wears a blue uniform and is always there if you need help?
The host asks a seemingly simple question.


Mother Theresa?
The contestant responds confusingly, but jokingly, to the question.


What is the role of the quiz show?
The host asks a more philosophical question.


I can only accept your first answer - sorry.
The host enforces the rules of the game.


Who is the Queen of England?
The host asks another question testing the contestant's knowledge of current affairs.


Oh, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
The contestant once again responds incorrectly.


Who is the leader of the opposition?
The host asks another question testing the contestant's knowledge of politics.


Oh that's a woman for sure, it's my missus.
The contestant makes an incorrect, but humorous, response.


What's the meaning of the word 'horrendous'?
The host asks another question testing the contestant's vocabulary.


A bad woman is it?
The contestant once again responds with a humorous, but incorrect answer.


What's the capital of Italy?
The host asks another question testing the contestant's geography.


Oh I know that, it's -er- Nipples - I - I mean Naples.
The contestant once again makes a humorous, but incorrect response.


Name the four counties in the United Kingdom.
The host asks a final question related to history.


This is easy - England, Scotland, Wales and London.
The contestant makes an incorrect response that displays a lack of knowledge.


In a sentence, what do you know about the SDP Liberal Alliance?
The last segment of the game asks an open-ended question.


Oh, is that the one my missus goes to where they do flower arranging
The contestant ends the game with a humorous, but incorrect response.


Now which would you like to take home with you
The host presents the contestant with multiple prizes.


Ooh, I'll have Wendy can I?
The contestant responds in a sexually suggestive manner.


Thank you for being a marvellous contestant.
The host thanks the contestant for their participation.


Let's hear it for 'em, shall we?
The host invites the audience to cheer for the contestant and praise them for their effort.


Put you hands together and give them a big round warm of women - I mean applause.
The host ends the game on a humorous note, suggesting that he misspoke, but drawing attention to his own prior behavior.


I love the quiz shows
The singer expresses their own love for game shows.


Don't you love the quiz shows?
The singer asks a rhetorical question.


The BBC knows you love the quiz shows
The artist suggests that the BBC is aware of the public's love for game shows.


And all the independents know you love the quiz shows
The artist suggests that independent channels are also aware of the public's love for game shows.


America taught us to love the quiz shows.
The singer nods to the influence of American game shows on the UK.


I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
The singer repeats their earlier assertion.


I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
The artist repeats their earlier assertion.




Contributed by Colton M. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

Patrick Jordan

Wonderful, simply wonderful. Thanks for sharing and for helping to keep the music and memories alive.

dreamerinalowprofile

Thank you, Patrick. All the best.

russell airsupply

Another gem. Cliff at his satirical best. He is definitely not a one trick pony

russell airsupply

@dreamerinalowprofile Bill Giles is still alive so he might comment!

dreamerinalowprofile

@russell airsupply Weather is in the the pipeline - hope I don't get too trolled!!

russell airsupply

@dreamerinalowprofile Weather is another satirical song - looking forward to seeing your slideshow

dreamerinalowprofile

Thank you for your positive comments. The big question is ... should I tackle Weather? ;))

Yeldah

This obviously brings out the theatrical side of Clifford T, just brilliant and still makes me laugh.

Yeldah

Yes I know he had one for the BBC Play For Today series, which he spoke about in one of his old radio interviews in Liverpool that I recall quite fondly, and he also wrote a number of songs to go with it which he later put on the Both Of Us album.
It's such a shame it was never made as it could well have opened many doors for him, but typical bloody Beeb .

dreamerinalowprofile

Yes, he had two plays planned that never came to fruition.

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