What Have I Done
DJ Shadow/Christina Carter Lyrics

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I speak from the heart
I fear beginning
I must go
Broken and soaked
To the wider world returning
I'll never be sullen again
Something is wrong
I can't stop my thoughts

I tell myself to stop them

Stop, stop what you're doing
I guess I'd better face it

The thoughts are sabotaging me
Even though they are mine
It feels as if it is physical
Like being in a different world
Weirder
As if somehow things just are

Let's go ahead and get it over with

Don't be afraid
Can't you trust me
We all have thoughts
And we are together
We are together
I am your healing spirit
I am your healing spirit
I am your healing spirit

Healing spirit

There is a boy
Standing in a meadow
Looking out into the sky
And hundreds (and hundreds)
And hundreds (and hundreds)
And hundreds of butterflies
Lift off from around him
(Lift off from around him)
That's all I can remember
(Lift off from around him...)

Your mind
Due (?) bright morning
Dance with light
Send stars to the night

I am awake
I have a dream
I am living proof
I am living proof

What I have done
What I have done
What I have done

First steps
Through open fields

Overall Meaning

The lyrics to DJ Shadow/Christina Carter's song "What Have I Done" depict someone who is experiencing mental health issues, specifically struggling with their own thoughts and how they are affecting them physically. The lyric "I speak from the heart, I fear beginning, I must go, broken and soaked" speaks to the feeling of being overwhelmed and wanting to escape. The line "To the wider world returning, I'll never be sullen again" suggests that the person is trying to come back to reality and become more positive. However, their negative thoughts continue to sabotage them, leading them to say "Stop, stop what you're doing, I guess I'd better face it."

Throughout the song, there is a recurring theme of healing, with the lines "Don't be afraid, can't you trust me, we all have thoughts and we are together" and "I am your healing spirit" suggesting that the person is seeking help from someone else to heal their mental state. The imagery of the boy in the meadow surrounded by butterflies also reinforces the idea of healing and lightness. The final repetition of "what I have done" could be interpreted as the person acknowledging the actions they have taken to seek help and get better.

Overall, the song portrays the struggles of mental health in a deep and reflective way, with a message of hope and the possibility of healing.

Line by Line Meaning

I speak from the heart
I communicate my true emotions and thoughts

I fear beginning
I am afraid of starting something new

I must go
I need to leave and move on

Broken and soaked
Emotionally damaged and overwhelmed

To the wider world returning
Going back out into the world after being gone or isolated

I'll never be sullen again
I will not be melancholy or gloomy anymore

Something is wrong
Something isn't right or is causing concern

I can't stop my thoughts
I cannot control my own thinking

I tell myself to stop them
I try to tell myself to stop or prevent certain thoughts

Stop, stop what you're doing
Stop your current actions or behavior

I guess I'd better face it
I realize I need to confront something unpleasant or challenging

The thoughts are sabotaging me
My thoughts are hindering or self-destructive

Even though they are mine
Despite these thoughts belonging to me

It feels as if it is physical
It feels like a tangible experience, not just mental

Like being in a different world
Feels like an alternate reality or perception

Weirder
Even stranger or more bizarre

As if somehow things just are
This is just the way things seem to be, inexplicably

Don't be afraid
Do not feel scared or nervous

Can't you trust me
Do you not have faith in me?

We all have thoughts
Everyone has their own thoughts, good and bad

And we are together
We are united, working together

I am your healing spirit
I am here to provide emotional healing and support

Healing spirit
A positive, comforting force for emotional healing

There is a boy
A young male character exists in this story or dream

Standing in a meadow
The boy is in an open field or grassy area

Looking out into the sky
Observing the vast, open sky

And hundreds (and hundreds)
There are many butterflies

Lift off from around him
The butterflies begin flying around the boy

That's all I can remember
The story or dream ends here, or the memory fades away

Your mind
The character's thoughts or consciousness

Due (?) bright morning
A beautiful, luminous morning

Dance with light
Enjoy the radiance and life of the world

Send stars to the night
Making darkness into something beautiful

I am awake
The character is conscious or alert

I have a dream
The character has a vision or aspiration

I am living proof
My existence proves or embodies a certain idea

What I have done
What I have accomplished or achieved

First steps
Taking initial actions or making beginning progress

Through open fields
Transversing an open or exposed terrain

Lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: JOSH PAUL DAVIS, CHRISTINA CARTER

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind

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