Although a vein of social and political humor runs though even his earliest work, Bern's work became more explicitly political during the 2004 US presidential election campaign, with songs such as "Bush Must Be Defeated" and "President" highlighting his sometimes surreal political takes.
Bern is reflexively literate, in the style of his favorite authors, including L.A.'s legendary bohemians Charles Bukowski and John Fante, urbane fantasist James Thurber, and yarn-spinning humorist Ring Lardner. He is in love with the power of words to turn on themselves, to frolic, to bite, and his strong, friendly voice can go from earnest to ferocious within seconds. Being captivated by Dan is the easy part; describing his music to the non-initiated is more difficult. One journalist tried: "topical-poetical-sarcastic-punk-folk." An admirable effort, further elaborated by the New York Times: "He veers from comedy to anger, conjectures to shaggy-dog stories; he takes sidelong approaches to theology, science fiction, consumer culture, art, love and baseball."
Welcome
Dan Bern Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
As the helicopter cam zooms in
And they superimpose green arrows
Google Earth it to the head of a pin
She says "There behind the police tape
"Seen it all with my eyes and ears
"I was talking to my friend Charlie
"And then Charlie disappeared"
Welcome, Welcome
Come and have some fun
We got every Chinese toy under the sun
And every Ponzi scheme
That ever has been run
And old men with hard-ons
And madmen with guns
And I heard you made some threats against me and my family
And I got a gun from a kindly neighbor lady
And I made it known that one step in the wrong direction
I'll shoot you in the back with no hesitation
Welcome, Welcome
Come and have some fun
We got every Chinese toy under the sun
And every Ponzi scheme
That ever has been run
And old men with hard-ons
And madmen with guns
And who's doing who
And where's the fire
And who do you think is juicin
And the rats and the zombies and the alien pigs
Which field should we turn you loose in
Monkeys in captivity
Ikea in the Amazon
What's in your wallet
And which side are you on
Can anyone still stand up
Or are we all just too ground down
Tryin' to make it through the day without your ass
Gettin' handed back to you in town
Sitting on the freeways and the buses and the trains
Praying you can get the kids inside before it rains
Welcome, Welcome
Come and have some fun
We got every Chinese toy under the sun
And every Ponzi scheme
That ever has been run
And old men with hard-ons
And madmen with guns
Stadiums, palladiums
Prisons second to none
And old men with hard-ons
And madmen with guns
The song "Welcome" by Dan Bern describes the chaos and violence that is present in today's world. The first verse paints a picture of a scene on TV, where the police are chasing someone and the singer's friend has disappeared, indicating that something serious has happened. The chorus sets the tone for the rest of the song, with a heavy sarcasm in the choice of words like "Welcome" and "Come and have some fun". Bern seems to be mocking the state of the world, where Ponzi schemes, old men with hard-ons and madmen with guns are prevalent. The second verse takes a darker turn, as the singer talks about threats made against him and his family, and how he has taken the necessary steps to defend himself. This is a stark reminder of the violence and fear that is all around. The rest of the song touches upon topics like gossip, conspiracy theories, animal captivity and environmental degradation, highlighting the many issues that plague our society.
Overall, the song is a commentary on the state of the world, depicting the madness and confusion that exists, where everyone is just trying to make it through the day without getting hurt. The chorus, with its ironic tone, suggests that despite all of this, we are supposed to find pleasure or enjoyment in this world, even though it is often so cruel and unforgiving. The song creates a picture of a dystopian world, where old men with hard-ons and madmen with guns are the norm, and where people are struggling to survive amidst chaos and uncertainty.
Line by Line Meaning
On the TV, someone's running
The TV is showing someone running as the helicopter cam zooms in.
And they superimpose green arrows
Green arrows are added to assist the viewer with the location.
Google Earth it to the head of a pin
The hyper-specific location is identified using Google Earth.
She says "There behind the police tape
The artist says they saw everything from behind the police tape.
"Seen it all with my eyes and ears
The artist was able to directly witness everything in detail.
"I was talking to my friend Charlie
The witness was talking to Charlie before Charlie disappeared.
And I heard you made some threats against me and my family
The singer claims to have heard threats against themselves and their family.
And I got a gun from a kindly neighbor lady
The artist acquired a gun from a friendly neighbor.
And I made it known that one step in the wrong direction
The artist has declared that any inappropriate actions will be met with force.
I'll shoot you in the back with no hesitation
The artist intends to use the gun to shoot anyone who does not comply.
And who's doing who
The lyrics question who is having sexual relations.
And where's the fire
The lyrics ask about the location of a fire.
And who do you think is juicin
The singer is inquiring about steroid users.
And the rats and the zombies and the alien pigs
The singer mentions animals that are not usually associated with daily life.
Which field should we turn you loose in
The lyrics ask where to release someone who does not belong.
Monkeys in captivity
The lyrics mention captive primates.
Ikea in the Amazon
A furniture store is located in a jungle area of Brazil.
What's in your wallet
The singer is inquiring about the contents of someone's wallet.
And which side are you on
It is unclear which team or side someone is supporting.
Can anyone still stand up
The lyrics are asking if someone is still able to maintain themselves in difficult times.
Or are we all just too ground down
The artist thinks that everyone is suffering and struggling.
Tryin' to make it through the day without your ass
Getting through the day without a major setback.
Gettin' handed back to you in town
Facing humiliation and ridicule in public.
Sitting on the freeways and the buses and the trains
Crowded public transit is making travel difficult.
Praying you can get the kids inside before it rains
Trying to keep the children safe and dry during rain.
Stadiums, palladiums
The singer mentions sports and concert venues.
Prisons second to none
The singer notes the quality of the local prisons.
And old men with hard-ons
Elderly men who have sexual desires.
And madmen with guns
People who are mentally unwell and have firearms.
Contributed by Chloe F. Suggest a correction in the comments below.