Anything Goes
Dorsey Brothers Orchestra Lyrics

Times have changed
The way things are now is different from how they were in the past.

And we've often rewound the clock
We have returned to the past in many ways.

Since the Puritans got a shock
Since the Puritans were surprised.

When they landed on Plymouth Rock.
When they first arrived in America.

If today
If in modern times.

Any shock they should try to stem
If anyone tries to prevent a surprise.

'Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock,
Instead of arriving in America.

Plymouth Rock would land on them.
They would be the ones who are surprised.

In olden days, a glimpse of stocking
In the past, seeing a woman's leg was considered scandalous.

Was looked on as something shocking.
It was frowned upon.

But now, God knows,
But now, who knows.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

Good authors too who once knew better words
Even respected writers who used to use more sophisticated vocabulary.

Now only use four-letter words
Now only use vulgar language.

Writing prose.
When they write.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

If driving fast cars you like,
If you enjoy driving fast cars.

If low bars you like,
If you like sleazy bars.

If old hymns you like,
If you like old religious songs.

If bare limbs you like,
If you like seeing exposed skin.

If Mae West you like,
If you like watching Mae West perform.

Or me undressed you like,
Or if you want to see me naked.

Why, nobody will oppose.
No one will object.

When ev'ry night the set that's smart is in-
When the fashionable crowd is attending.

Truding in nudist parties in
Crashing parties where people are naked.

Studios.
Movie studios.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

When Missus Ned McLean (God bless her)
When Mrs. Ned McLean (let's hope she's doing well.)

Can get Russian reds to "yes" her,
When she can convince communist Russians to agree with her.

Then I suppose
Then I imagine.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

When Rockefeller still can hoard en-
When even Rockefeller is still hoarding.

Ough money to let Max Gordon
Enough money to finance Max Gordon.

Produce his shows,
Support his productions.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

The world has gone mad today
The world is crazy now.

And good's bad today,
What is considered good is now considered bad.

And black's white today,
What is considered black is now considered white.

And day's night today,
What is considered day is now considered night.

And that gent today
And that person today.

You gave a cent today
You gave money today.

Once had several chateaux.
Who used to own many castles.

When folks who still can ride in jitneys
When people who can still ride in cheap, small cars.

Find out Vanderbilts and Whitneys
Learn that Vanderbilts and Whitneys.

Lack baby clo'es,
Don't have enough baby clothes.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

If Sam Goldwyn can with great conviction
If Sam Goldwyn can convincingly.

Instruct Anna Sten in diction,
Teach Anna Sten how to speak properly.

Then Anna shows
Then Anna displays.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

When you hear that Lady Mendl standing up
When you hear that Lady Mendl, standing up straight.

Now turns a handspring landing up-
Is now doing acrobatics.

On her toes,
On the tips of her feet.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.

Just think of those shocks you've got
Think about all the surprises you've experienced.

And those knocks you've got
And all the difficulties you've faced.

And those blues you've got
And all the sadness you've felt.

From that news you've got
From the news you've heard.

And those pains you've got
And all the physical discomfort you've felt.

(If any brains you've got)
(If you have any intelligence at all).

From those little radios.
From the small radios.

So Missus R., with all her trimmin's,
So Mrs. R., with all her fancy clothing.

Can broadcast a bed from Simmons
Can advertise a bed from Simmons.

'Cause Franklin knows
Because Franklin understands.

Anything goes.
Anything is acceptable.