Ghosts
Drive Thru Society Lyrics

I had plans to die today
I had a plan to end my life today

I trusted this bottle to take it all away
I had faith in alcohol to end my pain and kill me

and leave me cold
and take away all emotions and feelings from me

to fall asleep with nothing left to say
to die silently with no words left unspoken

cause no one cares anyway
because I believe no one loves or cares about me

and as I'm staring at my reflection now
as I look at myself in the mirror

it's screaming words at me
my reflection is expressing words of self-hate and criticism

that I'm not worthy
that I am not deserving of love or care

so I took my life, took it in my hands
So, in my despair, I decided to take my own life

I decided I'm not worth a chance
I concluded that I am not worth a chance at life or happiness

Why am I so dark inside?
Why am I consumed by negative thoughts and emotions?

these thoughts I cannot hide
I cannot keep these thoughts hidden, they are overwhelming

I'll let go of my life
I am willing to let go and end my life

lay down my guard tonight
I am prepared to drop my guard and give up

I destroy everything I touch
I feel like I bring destruction and pain to everything I come in contact with

It'll be so easy to give up
Ending my life seems like the easiest way out

these ghosts wrap me in their lies
My negative thoughts and emotions consume me and make me believe in false beliefs

nothing left to satisfy
Nothing can bring me happiness or satisfaction

and someone else had a different frame
Someone else had a differing perspective on my situation

on my distorted view of reality
On my flawed and skewed perception of the world around me

and as I laid there in my selfish state
As I remained focused on my own desires and needs

say between the walls of my fate
Trapped in my own destiny and despair

I felt a hope creep in instead
I felt a glimmer of positivity and possibility

and Truth re-wrote the words in my head
I experienced a change in perspective and a realization of truth

wide-eyed disbelief takes me back
I was in shock and disbelief with the change in my perception

the world only sees a selfish act
Others may only see my suicide attempt as a selfish act

but I swear I wanted to fight
I wanted to fight and get out of my despair

I didn't want to give up tonight
I did not want to end my life that night

I'm running blindly from death
I am trying to escape from death and hopelessness

but I see a light up ahead
But I see a glimmer of hope and positivity ahead

I know that You hear me
I believe that God hears me

I know You're listening
I know that God is paying attention to me

cause Truth has rescued me
Because my realization of truth saved me

and I'll see daylight again
I will see positivity and hope again

I want to understand
I want to comprehend the truth and purpose behind my life

that all You have for me
That everything God has planned for me

is all I'll ever need
Is all that I require to bring me happiness and fulfillment

and You came back for me when no one else believed
God returned to me when no one else had faith in me or believed in me

cause I'm alive
Because I am still living and have a chance at life