My Letters
Fastbacks Lyrics

Just yesterday I saw my own death in a dream
Recently, as in yesterday, while dreaming, I saw a vision of myself dying.

Life's never quite as bad or good as it may seem
Life is a mix of both good and bad things, even if they appear one way or the other.

I don't want anyone pretending that they care
I do not wish to have people acting as though they care for me when they do not.

I don't remember seeing any of you there
I do not recall any of you being present during difficult moments in my life.

Something I've tried writing down
There is something that I have attempted to write down.

First in pencil then in pen
Initially, I tried writing it down in pencil, and then later with a pen.

Something I've cried hard about
It is something that has made me cry a lot.

But you don't understand me then
Despite my efforts to write it down and express myself, you did not understand me at that time.

Somehow I can't write it out
For some reason, I am presently unable to write it down.

With a pencil or a pen
No matter if I use a pencil or a pen, I still cannot get it written down.

Read my letters
Please read the letters that I have written.

Leave my answers alone
Do not alter, edit or change my letters; leave my responses as is.

Sometimes I try to write out good things that I see
Occasionally, I try to write down positive things that I have witnessed.

The way they sound there's no way you'd believe it's me
However, given how it sounds, you may not believe that I am the one who witnessed it.

I'm always never very understood so well
I am not usually understood very well by others.

But when I'm hiding something everyone can tell
If I am hiding something, it is usually evident to everyone.

I dread these days when nothing I can do is fun
I dislike days when I cannot find anything enjoyable to do.

I count my choices up and there's exactly none
When I reflect on my options, I realize there are actually no choices available.