Defibrillator
Franz Ferdinand Lyrics

I didn't know Big Jamesy that well
I was not acquainted with Big Jamesy and didn't know much about him

He hung about with McPherson, my flatmate
He was usually around with McPherson who was my flatmate

I met him on Christmas day when I worked a shift at the 13th Note
The first time I met him was on Christmas day when I was working at the 13th Note

He sat at the end of the bar, drinking and drinking
He sat at the end of the bar, having one drink after another

until he threw up over it.
He consumed so much alcohol that he vomited over the bar counter

Watery spew dripping onto the pint glasses on the shelf below
His vomit spilled over the bar counter and dripped onto the glasses on a shelf below

Christmas day
It was Christmas day when he vomited over the bar counter

Thanks Jamesy
The artist doesn't blame Jamesy as it was unintentional

McPherson was the star of the Glasgow easy listening revival
McPherson was quite popular for playing soft, soothing music in Glasgow

spinning Klaus Wunderlich and Peters and Lee records
He played records of Klaus Wunderlich and Peters and Lee during his gig

and a kipper tie and polyester suit
He wore a kipper tie and a suit made of polyester

smelling of Oxfam
He had a unique odor, probably of the clothes from an Oxfam store

and Brut for men
He also used a perfume called Brut for Men

"Let´s get a band together! It'll be great! Big Jamesy can play guitar. He's rrrrrreally good"
McPherson suggested to form a band and Jamesy will play guitar as he's really talented

"Okay
The singer agreed with McPherson's suggestion with the word "Okay"

I'll ask Baldy Keith to come down and play drums
The artist will invite Baldy Keith to play the drums for the band

He's got a band as well"
Baldy Keith currently has a band of his own

So I was back in the basement at the 13th Note with Big Jamesy, McPherson and Baldy Keith
The singer, Jamesy, McPherson, and Baldy Keith returned to the 13th Note's basement

We didn't have a name any songs or any idea of what we were going to do other that it was going to be "rrrrrrreally heavy"
The band's name, songs, and type of music wasn't decided yet except that it will be really heavy

Big Jamesy looked like one of those late Ramones
Jamesy had a similar appearance to the members of the late band Ramones

You know those guys that came in to play the drums or the bass when Dee Dee had gone off to rap
The artist describes the band dynamics where someone plays the drums or the bass when Dee Dee goes off to rap

Leather jacket, black bowl cut, surly stoop and malnourished frame
Jamesy had a lean, tough look, with a leather jacket, a black bowl cut hairstyle, and a surly gait

"And on drums it's... BENNY RAMONE"
The singer introduces Benny as the drummer for their new band

Instantly identifiable but completely anonymous
Although Benny was recognizable as a drummer, he was still unknown and anonymous

We set up our gear
The band arranged their instruments and gears for a performance

Baldy Keith's parents had bought him a huge, ostentatious kit with too many toms and one of those backwarrds cymbals
Keith's drum kit was grand, lavish, and had excessive toms and a backward cymbal

McPherson's bass a beautiful Paddy's market semi that shreked when any amp was turned over two
McPherson's guitar, bought from Paddy's market, was awe-inspiring but had feedback issues

I was gonna sing
The artist is the lead singer of the band

And Big Jamesy brought out his Charvel and plugged it in a luminous, yellow DOD, Metal Maniac pedal
Jamesy brought his Charvel guitar and connected it to a bright yellow DOD, Metal Maniac pedal

Then turned every dial into Peavey tranny amp as far to the right as it would go
Jamesy turned every dial of his guitar up to the maximum setting of his Peavey amp

Then he started
Jamesy began playing guitar after setting up his instrument

Ah shite
The artist uttered an expletive, maybe to express frustration, fatigue or as a lighthearted exclamation