Demons
Gurldoll Lyrics
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And so now, here we go again
Chewing more than I can swallow
Pick my own path then don't follow
See my heart is so rotten, yeah
My core is so miserable
A slip of the tongue again
Maybe twenty one missed calls
Lab rat in a cage
Like, what's my next mistake
I'm a fucking psychopath
My chance of healing fucking passed
Days are wasted getting wasted
I say shit without thinking
Fuck it, no one even listens
Life's a bitch, my time is ticking
Pour one up, I'm sinking now
Put my body in the ground
Tears are tainted
Body aching
I'm a downer, let me drown
Yeah
I am made of knives
Come too close, you won't survive
Heart as cold as ice
Demons always wanna fight me
My heart is icy
Demons wanna fight me
Demons wanna fight
Demons always wanna fight
Head full of maggots, bitch
Suffocating when we kiss
I'm on my own hit list
Thoughts so dark
I can't escape this
This world where I live
Empty bottles, smoking cigs
How do I escape
Tell me how do I escape this
They say fake it til you make it
But I'm not about that fake shit
I've got bloody hands, I'm shaking
Pins and needles in my brain
Don't ask me questions 'cause I don't know
In my bedroom I'm all alone
Light a match watch it start to glow
Set fire to my soul
Pacing back and forth, don't know
Where my body's supposed to go
Every place, I feel alone
Yeah, that starts to take a toll
I don't think times on my side
Maybe soon I'll say goodbye
To this rotten, broken wasteland
Where I'm trying to survive
Yeah
I am made of knives
Come too close, you won't survive
Heart as cold as ice
Demons always wanna fight me
My heart is icy
Demons wanna fight me
Demons wanna fight
Demons always wanna fight
Head full of maggots, bitch
Suffocating when we kiss
I'm on my own hit list
Thoughts so dark
I can't escape this
This world where I live
Empty bottles, smoking cigs
How do I escape
Tell me how do I escape
I am made of knives
Come too close, you won't survive
Heart as cold as ice
Demons always wanna fight me
My heart is icy
Demons wanna fight me
Demons wanna fight
Demons always wanna fight
Head full of maggots, bitch
Suffocating when we kiss
I'm on my own hit list
Thoughts so dark
I can't escape this
This world where I live
Empty bottles, smoking cigs
How do I escape
Tell me how do I escape this
In Gurldoll's song "Demons," the lyrics give a glimpse into the dark side of the singer's mind. She sings about the struggle of dealing with her own negative thoughts and destructive tendencies. She acknowledges her faults, admitting that she often bites off more than she can chew and makes the same mistakes repeatedly. The line "my chance of healing fucking passed" suggests that she may have given up on trying to get better. She regards herself as a "fucking psychopath" and expresses hopelessness towards the idea of ever escaping the world she lives in. In the end, the demons she battles still want to fight her, and she feels suffocated in her own thoughts.
The dark nature of the lyrics does not diminish their power, as they are full of raw emotion and honesty. The singer does not mince words, but instead reveals the rawness of her mind through her lyrics. The line "I'm on my own hit list" is particularly poignant, as it conveys a sense of self-destructiveness.
Line by Line Meaning
Bigger bite, it's my fault again
I took on more than I could handle, and it's my own fault.
And so now, here we go again
I'm repeating the same mistakes.
Chewing more than I can swallow
I'm taking on too much at once and can't handle it.
Pick my own path then don't follow
I make my own choices but don't stick to them.
See my heart is so rotten, yeah
I'm unhappy and bitter inside.
My core is so miserable
I'm deeply unhappy and can't seem to change it.
A slip of the tongue again
I said something I regret.
Maybe twenty one missed calls
I'm ignoring people who care about me.
Lab rat in a cage
I feel trapped and helpless.
Like, what's my next mistake
I'm constantly worried about messing up again.
I'm a fucking psychopath
I feel like there's something wrong with me mentally.
My chance of healing fucking passed
I feel like it's too late for me to change or get better.
Days are wasted getting wasted
I spend my time just getting drunk or high.
I say shit without thinking
I speak without considering the consequences.
Fuck it, no one even listens
I feel like no one cares about what I say or do.
Life's a bitch, my time is ticking
I'm unhappy with my life and feel like I'm running out of time to change it.
Pour one up, I'm sinking now
I'm drinking my problems away and feeling worse.
Put my body in the ground
I feel like I'm already dead inside.
Tears are tainted
My sadness is mixed with other negative emotions.
Body aching
My physical and emotional pain is overwhelming.
I'm a downer, let me drown
I'm bringing everyone down with me, so just let me be.
Yeah
Just an interjection.
I am made of knives
I am sharp and dangerous to be around.
Come too close, you won't survive
If you get too close to me, I might hurt you.
Heart as cold as ice
I'm emotionless and detached.
Demons always wanna fight me
My inner demons are always causing me problems.
Head full of maggots, bitch
My mind is diseased and corrupted.
Suffocating when we kiss
Even in intimate moments, I feel trapped and uneasy.
I'm on my own hit list
I have self-destructive tendencies.
Thoughts so dark
My thoughts are negative and self-destructive.
I can't escape this
I feel stuck in my current situation.
This world where I live
The world I'm living in is overwhelming and oppressive.
Empty bottles, smoking cigs
I'm using drugs and alcohol to cope with my problems.
How do I escape
I don't know how to get out of this situation.
Tell me how do I escape this
I'm pleading for someone to help me out of this situation.
Writer(s): Kansas Acevedo
Contributed by Lila L. Suggest a correction in the comments below.