Now and Then
Homemade Lyrics

Poor Billy received his new on a Sunday
Billy received his orders on a Sunday, leaving to join the military

Woken by his mother and she had just this to say
Billy's mother woke him up to inform him of his orders to join the military

My son please return to me safe and ok you only turned
Billy's mother pleaded with him to return home safely, knowing he had just turned 18 years old

18 five months ago this may
Billy had turned 18 years old five months ago in May

Into the chopper his soul climbed aboard
Billy boarded a helicopter to join the military

Dressed up all in green with the cross of the lord
Billy wore his military uniform and carried a cross

He will soon be revealed to this violence and sin
Billy would soon experience the reality of war and its atrocities

Brought by his country to protect and to defend
Billy was sent by his country to protect and defend its interests

He looked to the sky and pictured it way back when
Billy reminisced about his past, wondering if he would return as the same person

Will I return the same boy or a man without friends
Billy wondered if he would come back from war changed, losing his friends in the process

Lead into those trees
Billy was led to the trees where he was to fight

The ones that stood oh so tall
The trees were tall and imposing

We gave the government our fees
The citizens paid taxes to the government

And Mr. Nixon took it all
The government misused taxpayer money, as exemplified by Nixon

To pay off all the plumbers that broke right through that wall
The money was used to pay those involved in the Watergate scandal

Well that was then and this is now Together as we fall
Although things have changed since then, we are still united in our struggles and hardships

Now this boy comes back just looking to the crowd
Billy returned from war and searched for his former friends in the crowd

Who once was his friend but now is not allowed
Billy's former friends were prohibited from associating with him due to his military status

To be with all the killers in society today
Billy's friends could not associate with him due to his association with violence and the military

Given off this feeling Billy was betrayed
Billy felt betrayed by his friends, who abandoned him after he joined the military

Crying to his mother just like he had done before
Billy went to his mother for comfort, as he had done in the past

Forced to see the bed that left behind the door
Billy saw his empty bed, knowing that he had lost parts of his previous life to the military

Pushed to shoot, shoot aim and kill
Billy was trained to shoot and kill as part of his military training

It was burned into his mind and soon it was a thrill
The military training and violence became ingrained in Billy's mind, almost becoming a source of excitement

Now this boy comes back reaching to his chest
Billy returned home and searched for a sense of faith and spirituality

Looking for the love of god that he had put to rest
Billy sought connection with God, which he had lost amidst the violence and betrayal

Now I lay myself down to sleep
Billy prayed to God before sleeping

I shall pray the lord to myself to keep
Billy prayed for protection under God's watch

And if I die before I wake
Billy acknowledged the possibility of death due to his experiences in war

I wish I could give back all the souls I had to take
Billy felt remorse for the lives he may have taken during war

Please set me free
Billy wished to be free from the physical and emotional pain caused by war

On free to live this place
Billy hoped to live a full and free life, liberated from the violence and trauma of war

This manhood? That was given underneath those trees, those trees.
Billy's sense of masculinity and identity was shaped and tested by the violence and trauma of war, experienced in the midst of the tall trees.