A Couple of Swells
Irving Berlin Lyrics

We're a couple of swells
We are two very attractive and fashionable individuals

We stop at the best hotels
We stay only at the most luxurious and upscale hotels

But we prefer the country far away from the city smells
However, we enjoy the peace and tranquility of rural areas, away from the pollution and congestion of the city

We're a couple of sports
We love to engage in physical activities and outdoor sports

The pride of the tennis courts
We are known and respected for our skills in playing tennis

In June, July and August we look cute when we're dressed in shorts
During the summertime months, we look charming and attractive in our casual shorts attire

The Vanderbilts have asked us up for tea
We have been invited by the wealthy Vanderbilt family to join them for tea

We don't know how to get there, no sirree
However, we are unsure of the exact location or directions to the Vanderbilt's home

We would drive up the Avenue but we haven't got the price
We would love to travel by car up the avenue, but we cannot afford it

We would skate up the Avenue but there isn't any ice
We cannot travel by ice skates because there is no ice on the Avenue

We would ride on a bicycle but we haven't got a bike
We don't have a bicycle to ride up the Avenue

So we'll walk up the Avenue
Therefore, we will travel by foot up the Avenue

Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue
Indeed, we are committed to journeying on foot up the Avenue

And to walk up the Avenue's what we like
In fact, walking up the Avenue is our preferred method of travel

Wall Street bankers are we
We both work as bankers on Wall Street

With plenty of currency
We have a large amount of money at our disposal

We'd open up the safe but we forgot where we put the key
However, we cannot access our own money because we cannot locate the key to our safe

We're the favorite lads
We are very popular amongst the ladies

Of girls in the picture ads
We are well-liked by the young women who appear in advertisements

We'd like to tell you who we kissed last night but we can't be cads
Although we would like to boast about our romantic escapades, we feel it would be improper to do so

The Vanderbilts are waiting at the club
The Vanderbilt family is currently anticipating our arrival at their club

But how are we to get there? that's the rub
However, we are still uncertain about the best way to travel to the club

We would sail up the Avenue but we haven't got a yacht
We don't own a yacht, so we cannot travel by boat up the Avenue

We would drive up the Avenue but the horse we had was shot
Our horse is no longer available to be ridden up the Avenue

We would ride on a trolley car but we haven't got the fare
We don't have the money to ride on a trolley car to the club

So we'll walk up the Avenue
Therefore, we will once again opt to travel by foot up the Avenue

Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue
Indeed, we are resolved to journey on foot up the Avenue

Yes, we'll walk up the Avenue 'til we're there
We will continue to walk up the Avenue until we reach our destination