You Oughta Know
KITCHEN - Alanis Morissette Lyrics

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I want you to know, that I am happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
An older version of me
Is she perverted like me?
Would she go down on you in a theater?
Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby?
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

'Cause the love that you gave that we made
Wasn't able to make it enough for you
To be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me
You'd hold me until you died
'Til you died, but you're still alive

And I'm here, to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair, to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me, Mr. Duplicity?
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face
How quickly I was replaced
And are you thinking of me when you fuck her?

'Cause the love that you gave that we made
Wasn't able to make it enough for you
To be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me
You'd hold me until you died
'Til you died, but you're still alive

And I'm here, to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair, to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

'Cause the joke that you laid in the bed
That was me and I'm not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes, and you know it
And every time I scratch my nails
Down someone else's back I hope you feel it
Well, can you feel it?

Well I'm here, to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair, to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

Well I'm here, to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair, to deny me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

Overall Meaning

In Alanis Morissette's song "You Oughta Know," the lyrics tell a story of a woman who is hurt and angry after a breakup. The song reflects her emotions and the questions that she has regarding her ex-lover's new relationship.

In the first verse, the woman expresses that she wishes happiness for her ex-lover and his new partner. However, there is a sense of bitterness as she wonders if the new woman is similar to her in certain ways. She questions if this woman would engage in sexual acts in a public place like she had done previously and if she possesses the same intelligence and the potential to be an excellent mother as herself. This suggests that she is questioning the depth of their new relationship and comparing herself to this new woman.

The chorus reveals the woman's frustration and disappointment. She realizes that despite the love they shared and the efforts they put into their relationship, it was not enough for him. The phrase "be open wide" can be interpreted as a metaphor for emotional vulnerability and intimacy, suggesting that he was not fully open to her. She is reminded of him every time he mentions the new woman's name, and it leaves her contemplating if he truly meant his promises to her. Although she expected their love to last until death, she realizes he is still alive while she is left dealing with the aftermath and pain of their breakup.

In the second verse, the woman notices that her ex-lover seems to be doing well and appears peaceful. However, she reveals that she is not as well as he may think and feels the need to let him know. She questions if he has forgotten about her, referring to him as Mr. Duplicity, suggesting that he was deceitful or two-faced during their relationship. She expresses her frustration at him moving on so quickly and being replaced in such a callous manner. The lyrics become more explicit as she wonders if he ever thinks of her while being intimate with the new woman.

The chorus repeats, emphasizing her desire to remind him of the mess he left behind when he walked away from their relationship. She believes it is unfair for him to deny her the emotional burden she now carries due to their past experiences together.

In the final verse, the woman asserts her presence and determination not to fade away. She alludes to a sexual encounter they had once shared, suggesting that she still lingers in his memory, even when his eyes are closed. She is not ready to let go of the pain and anger, as she hopes that every time she scratches someone else's back, he can feel her frustration and hurt.

Overall, "You Oughta Know" portrays a woman grappling with the aftermath of a breakup, expressing her feelings of betrayal, hurt, and lingering attachment. The lyrics display her desire to make her ex-lover aware of the pain he caused and the lasting impact he left on her life.

Line by Line Meaning

I want you to know, that I am happy for you
I want you to understand that despite the pain you caused me, I genuinely wish you happiness

I wish nothing but the best for you both
I genuinely hope that you and your new partner have a wonderful life together

An older version of me
A previous version of myself, a version that existed before our relationship ended

Is she perverted like me?
Does she have the same unconventional desires and sexual preferences as I do?

Would she go down on you in a theater?
Is she willing to engage in sexual activities with you in public places, like going down on you in a theater?

Does she speak eloquently
Is she able to express herself in a sophisticated and articulate manner?

And would she have your baby?
Is she capable of having children with you?

I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother
I believe that she would excel in the role of being a mother to your potential children

'Cause the love that you gave that we made
Because the love that we shared and the love that you expressed towards me

Wasn't able to make it enough for you
Was not sufficient to fulfill your emotional needs and desires

To be open wide, no
To openly share your true emotions and vulnerabilities, which you were unable to do

And every time you speak her name
Whenever you mention her name in conversations

Does she know how you told me
Does she understand that you once confessed to me

You'd hold me until you died
That you promised to love me and be there for me until your death

'Til you died, but you're still alive
Until the end of your life, yet you are still living

And I'm here, to remind you
I am present in your life, serving as a reminder of our past relationship

Of the mess you left when you went away
Of the emotional turmoil and chaos you caused by leaving

It's not fair, to deny me
It is unjust to withhold from me

Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
Of the burden and pain that you inflicted upon me

You, you, you oughta know
You should be fully aware of the consequences of your actions

You seem very well, things look peaceful
You appear to be doing well, your life seems calm and harmonious

I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
I am not doing as well as it may seem, and I felt it was important for you to be aware of that

Did you forget about me, Mr. Duplicity?
Have you conveniently erased me from your memory, you deceptive person?

I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
I apologize for interrupting your meal, I understand it may not be an ideal time to communicate

It was a slap in the face
Your actions felt like a direct and hurtful insult

How quickly I was replaced
It is disheartening to see how rapidly you found a new partner to take my place

And are you thinking of me when you fuck her?
Do thoughts of me linger in your mind when you have sexual encounters with her?