The Life I Never Led
Katie Rowley Jones Lyrics

I've never talked back
I've never challenged authority or spoken up for myself

I've never slept late
I've never relaxed or taken it easy

I've never sat down When told to stand straight
I've never disobeyed or protested against rules or expectations

I've never let go And gone with the flow And don't even know, really, why
I've never embraced spontaneity or just lived in the moment, and I'm not sure why

I've never asked questions Or taken a dare
I've never been curious or embraced challenges

I've never worn clothes That might make people stare
I've never expressed myself or taken risks through fashion choices

I've never rebelled Or stood up and yelled Or even just held my head high
I've never defied expectations or stood up for myself or others

And all of the feelings unspoken All of the truths unsaid They're all I have left Of the life I never led
All of the emotions and truths I've suppressed in myself are a reminder of what I've missed out on

I've never gone surfing Or ran with a crowd Or danced on a table Or laughed much too loud
I've never been adventurous, social, or carefree in my experiences

I've never quite dared To leave myself bared I've just been too scared I might fall
I've never been truly vulnerable or risked exposure, since I fear the consequences

I've never seen Paris Swum naked Been kissed I've never quite realised Just how much I've missed
I've never been exposed to new places or experiences, and only now realize what I've been deprived of

And what did I get For hedging each bet? Another regret, and that's all
All I've accomplished from being overly cautious and complacent is more disappointment and remorse

And all of the wishes unasked for All of needs unfed They're all that remain Of the life I never led
My unfulfilled desires and unmet needs are all that's left of a life I chose not to live

And now... Now that you've given me one Little taste of it And now... Now that I know what I know Well how... How can I go on ignoring the waste of it? After all of the years That I've clung to my fears. Won't you help me let go? Help me let go!
Now that I've experienced even a glimpse of life outside my comfort zone, I cannot keep ignoring what I've missed out on. After years of being held back by my fears, I need help breaking free and embracing a new reality.

I want to be brave I want to be strong I want to believe I'm where I belong
I feel the intense desire to take risks and embrace change, to believe in myself and where I'm headed

To stand up and say "I'm seizing the day" To not just obey, but to choose
I want to take charge of my own life and make choices on my own accord

And I may not surf I may not see France But I have to know I still have the chance And maybe I'll make A painful mistake It's mine though, to take or refuse
I may not have all the opportunities I desire, but I still have the ability to explore and discover a new way of life. And if I make mistakes along the way, at least they're my own to make.

And all of the doors yet to open All of the rooms ahead They're beaconing bright Scary and new But I'm standing tall And I'm walking through What's gone may be gone But I won't go on Playing dead!
The future awaits, full of promise and new beginnings. Although it's intimidating and unknown, I am confident and fearless as I step forward. What's done is done, but I won't waste another moment living without truly living.

It's time to start living The life I never led
It's time to take ownership of my life and break free from the chains of self-doubt and complacency. It's time to truly live the life I've always wanted.