Ultra Mega
Mr. Lif Lyrics

14 16" splitscreens all showing what you're viewing
We are constantly monitoring your actions on multiple screens.

What you doing? Withering away!
Your life is passing by as you waste it on meaningless activities.

Black friday
The day when people are convinced to spend their money on discounted items they didn't even need.

Sale prices by Dionysus
We are using the god of wine to entice you into buying more things you don't need.

The God of wine just bought a spine
We are turning you into spineless creatures who give in to consumerism.

Rise up from your couch
Get up and start living your life outside of your comfort zone.

Get it now, go out
Don't wait, buy our products and go out to show them off to the world.

Follow the warm glow
We are luring you in with bright lights and attractive displays.

(We sense you)
We are tracking you and know exactly what you like based on your buying history.

Open the door
Come into our store and let us sell you things you don't need.

(Who sent you?)
We want to know how you found out about us so we can improve our advertising.

Our advertising so we know why you're here
We are using targeted advertising to lure you into our store.

Winter wear Summer wear In board gear Outboard gear
We have a variety of products for every season and activity, and we want you to buy them all.

We've got Korgs here next to the cords there
We are mixing products together to create a sense of urgency to buy everything you see.

Split peas and greens Slacks with seams Right next to your kid's dreams
We are putting products from all different categories next to each other, so you'll end up buying more than you intended.

Stationary
We even have stationery, so you never have to leave our store.

Gonne elope? Buy a diamond ring and envelopes
We are suggesting that purchasing a diamond ring from us is the way to go if you're eloping.

Just delete hesitation Implant impulse In skulls
We want you to buy things without thinking and to make impulse purchases that benefit our business.

Roam the aisles till it feels worthwhile Now bring forth your selection
We want you to spend a lot of time in our store until you feel pressured to make a purchase.

Choose your weapon Currency, credit card, mega card
We have multiple payment options, so you can quickly and easily buy our products.

It's never hard We aim to please Did you notice, we also have...?
We want you to feel like buying our products is easy, and we are constantly trying to upsell you on other items.

Oh, you have? Let me grab a bigger bag
We are encouraging you to buy more things than you originally intended, and we are always ready with a bigger bag.

Now walk through the scanners Keep us in your daily planner
We want you to remember us and come back soon, so we can sell you more stuff.

We're a Master Store But really mainly just Master!
We are trying to convince you that we are the best store around, but really we just want to make a profit.

Buy more Save more We're your saviour Get 6 if you trade 4
We are using discounts and promotions to make you feel like you're getting a good deal, even though you are still spending money you don't need to.

Chance of a lifetime Hop in the right line $12.99 to hear a hype rhyme
We will do anything to make you think you are missing out on a great opportunity, even if it's just paying $12.99 to hear a mediocre rap.

Win a trip Win a a whip We don't give a shit
We are using cheap prizes and promotions to make you think we care about you, when really we just want your money.

Welcome to the realms of the infinite!
We are opening your eyes to the endless world of consumerism, where you can always buy more and never be satisfied.