The Enlightenment
Murli Lyrics

Auntie used to bathe me like she was trying to wash the black out of me.
My aunt used to bathe me in a way that seemed like she was trying to erase my blackness.

Years of miseducation, misrepresentation, spiritual genocide and she was still Trying to wash me clean
Even though I had been exposed to years of miseducation, misrepresentation, and spiritual genocide that contributed to a negative perception of my blackness, my aunt still tried to wash me clean of it.

She was still, trying to, Wash me down
My aunt continued to attempt to erase my blackness by washing it out of me.

Wash me brighter, Caro Light-er
My aunt wanted to wash me until I became lighter-skinned like the Caro Light products used for skin bleaching.

She was still trying to wash me free
Despite her efforts to erase my blackness, my aunt believed that washing me clean of it would free me from the negative perceptions associated with it.

Made it seem like I could only be valued for my complexion
My aunt instilled in me the belief that my worth was solely determined by my complexion.

With little regard for my complexity
My aunt failed to recognize the complexity of my identity beyond my skin color.

The sun, she said, burns away beauty
According to my aunt, the sun had the power to destroy what she perceived as beauty.

Burns darkness into you
My aunt believed that exposure to the sun caused darkness to be burned into your skin.

So avoid UV rays And don't raise your eyes too high heavenward
My aunt advised me to stay away from UV rays and to avoid looking up as both could contribute to darkening my skin.

It will burn the white out of your gaze
Looking up at the sun could also potentially cause one to lose their white gaze or lighter complexion.

Now, I was young And too full of Icarus And so I learned how to wait Until I could slip my still wet body Through the cracks of her attention
As a young person, I was bold and eager to experience new things. I would wait for moments when my aunt wasn't paying attention in order to sneak away and do things that she advised against, like exposing myself to the sun.

Stand on the veranda Dust on my skin Warmth written over my soles Face upturned And stay Just to feel the way that browning sun could burn I took it and I loved it Deep into my skin Deep into my body Like the Vaseline my mother used My mother didn't take that from me
I would stand outside on the veranda with dust on my skin, feeling the warmth of the sun on the soles of my feet with my face turned upwards to soak it all in. I loved the feeling of the sun burning into my skin and imbibed it deeply like how I did with the Vaseline my mother used to moisturize me. My mother never instilled in me the same negative beliefs about my blackness as my aunt did.

Gave me a childhood divorced from cultural expectations
My mother allowed me to have a childhood that was free from cultural expectations and stereotypes that could negatively affect my self-worth.

And the space To allow my confidence to marry reality
My upbringing also gave me the space to develop confidence in myself and align it with reality.

My body was a place where I could be Unashamed
My body was a place where I could be who I am without any shame or insecurity.

Until one day, Auntie looked at me Eyes like obituaries Let them skate across my face as though she was witnessing some great tragedy 'You're getting dark,' she said But made it sound like 'ugly' And I began to shrink
One day, my aunt looked at me with disapproving eyes that made me feel like she was witnessing something terrible happen. She told me that I was getting darker, but used a tone that implied that it was synonymous with being ugly, which made me feel ashamed and small.

Dissected my every molecule and atom in my anatomy Invested way too much energy Lining myself up alongside my peers In front of mirrors Impaling myself mentally Wondering Where is the abhorrent in me?
My aunt's words made me obsessive about my appearance, to the point where I would scrutinize every part of myself under a microscope and compare it to those around me in front of mirrors. This mental impaling led me to question what was so wrong with me that made my aunt so disapproving.

We all know that if the world is a stage Then these bottles, pills Chemical solutions are the poles which we cling to And we are all stripping ourselves down For the single bills and loose change of everyone else's approval
People use skin-lightening products like creams and pills in the pursuit of seeking validation and approval from others, often placing their self-worth in the hands of others.

So frightened Misunderstanding every day what it means to be 'enlightened'
Many people are scared and confused about what true enlightenment means, often turning to external factors like appearance to try to achieve it.

So to be honest with you I don't have a problem with bleaching I have a problem with a way of thinking, that has broken us so far mentally We believe a whole ethnicity can only be celebrated in one shade of skin
I don't have an issue with skin bleaching products in and of themselves, but rather the negative mindset and thinking that leads people to believe that only certain shades of skin are acceptable or desirable.

I promise not to hide who I am In a world that has always been more than black and white CauseI refuse to bleach away tomorrow So some people can bleach themselves Unashamed
I refuse to hide who I am in a world that is more complex and diverse than simple black and white distinctions. I refuse to bleach myself to conform to others' expectations and beliefs. I choose to remain unashamed and proud of who I am.