Coming Up For Air
Nominee Lyrics

MY WHOLE LIFE I'VE BEEN PICKING UP THE PIECES AND TRYING TO FORCE THEM ALL TOGETHER
Throughout my entire life, I've been collecting and attempting to fit together the broken fragments of myself.

AND YOU FIGURED AFTER ALL THESE YEARS I'D KNOW BETTER BUT I MEDICATE AND FIXATE ON THE THINGS THAT I CANT CHANGE AND TRY MY BEST NOT TO PULL YOU UNDER AND I ONLY HAVE MY SELF TO BLAME
Even though you thought I might have learned by now, I find myself obsessing over the aspects of my life that I have no control over. In trying to keep myself afloat, I sometimes inadvertently drag you down with me, and for that, I take full responsibility.

A BETTER YEAR ISN'T MUCH TO ASK WHEN I KNOW MY CHANCES AND YOUR SCARED THAT THE MESS WE MADE WON'T COME TOGETHER I FEEL YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT EVERY TIME I LOSE MY TEMPER EVERY TIME I LOSE MY TEMPER
I understand that it's not asking for much to hope for a better year, considering the odds aren't always in our favor. However, your fear that we won't be able to pull ourselves out of the mess we've created is palpable, and it breaks my heart to see the disappointment in your eyes when I lose my temper.

WE'VE GOT THE WHOLE DAY WITH NOWHERE TO BE BUT I'LL FUCK IT ALL UP SELF DEPRECATING YOU SAY THERE'S NOTHING WRONG BUT PLEASE THERE'S A BLACK COULD LOOMING OVER ME YOU ASKED ME WHY DO I DO THIS? AND YOU'RE RIGHT I'M OUT OF EXCUSES
We have all day to spend together, yet I can't help but sabotage our time together by being too hard on myself. You insist that everything is okay, but I can feel a sense of dread hovering over me. When you question why I act this way, I am forced to realize that I don't have a valid answer.

I'M NOT WORTHY OF THE AIR YOU BREATHE BUT I'M INCONSIDERATE, I NEED YOU AROUND ME I'M NOT WORTHY OF THE AIR YOU BREATHE SO WE'RE SUFFOCATING I CAN FEEL YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT AND IT'S MORE THAN I CAN BARE ALL I DO IS PULL YOU UNDER WHEN YOU'RE COMING UP FOR AIR
I don't feel deserving of the love and care you provide me, yet I continue to be selfish by trying to keep you close at all times. Because of my toxic behavior, we're both suffocating under the weight of our relationship. It's painful to sense your disappointment in me, especially when I know I'm the one causing you to struggle.

LIE TO ME AND TELL ME YOU'RE OKAY A BETTER YEAR ISN'T MUCH TO ASK WHEN I KNOW MY CHANCES AND YOUR SCARED THAT THE MESS WE MADE WON'T COME TOGETHER I FEEL YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT EVERY TIME I LOSE MY TEMPER EVERY TIME I LOSE MY TEMPER
It hurts to see you suffer because of my actions, so sometimes I want you to hide the truth from me and pretend everything is fine, even though I know I need to face the consequences of my behavior. I still hold out hope for a better future for us, even though your fear is justifiable. But every time I slip up and let my emotions get the better of me, I can feel your disappointment acutely.