Selfish
Price Lyrics

I built a house to harbor myself in
I created a safe space for myself, isolating and protecting myself from others.

I lock you out I know that I'm selfish
I deliberately shut you out because I prioritize my own desires and needs above yours.

My mother told me
My mother advised me.

To follow my feet
To trust my instincts and go where they lead me.

But my legs feel weak can't help it
However, I lack the strength and confidence to follow my instincts.

Said I'm doing fine I'm getting no sleep
I claim to be okay, but I'm actually sleepless and troubled.

Hold my breath every time the phone screen lights up
I nervously anticipate your messages, hoping it's you reaching out.

Praying it's your name that I'm gonna see
I desperately hope to see your name on my phone screen.

But it's not, starting to regret the cold feet I'm stuck
But it's someone else, and I'm beginning to regret my hesitation and fear of commitment.

Try to tell myself I'm good without you but I'm really not
I try to convince myself that I don't need you, but deep down, I know I'm not okay without you.

I been having trouble trying to tell you how I feel inside
I struggle to express my true emotions to you.

Being by your side the only time i ever feel alive
Only when I'm with you do I truly feel alive and fulfilled.

Don't over exaggerate, you told me that a million times
You repeatedly warned me not to exaggerate or blow things out of proportion.

Okay well maybe not a million times
Okay, maybe not literally a million times, but you've emphasized it frequently.

But if we kept it going we could reach the sky
If we continued our relationship, we could achieve great heights together.

I played it safe, think I need a roof
I chose the safe and comfortable path, but now I realize I need something to protect me.

Thought it could be me and you
I believed that we could have a future together.

But I couldn't see it through so
But I couldn't follow through, so I...

I used to be your rock
I used to be your source of strength and support.

Lately you been skipping stones, you don't wanna talk
Recently, you've been avoiding me and refusing to communicate.

I rather take the sticks and stones, hurts more than I thought
I'd rather face criticisms and insults, as they hurt more than I anticipated.

Guess I got some brittle bones, so now when you knock
It seems I have a fragile emotional state, so when you try to reach out to me...

Sorry baby isn't home
I apologize, but I'm not emotionally available or responsive right now.

And maybe this time it's different yeah
Perhaps this time, the situation has changed.

Maybe the scale is tipping yeah
Perhaps the balance between us is shifting.

House got a well I could wish in yeah
In my self-built house, I have a place where I can make wishes.

So I make wishes
So I rely on wishing rather than taking action.

If I just wish then, I won't have to work for it
If I simply rely on wishing, I won't have to put in the effort to achieve my desires.

If I just get lucky I won't have to work for it
If I simply get lucky, I won't have to put in the effort to achieve my desires.

If I just get money I won't have to work for it
If I simply acquire wealth, I won't have to put in the effort to achieve my desires.

Right
That's my flawed thinking.

In the mean time
In the meantime, while I'm waiting for things to happen magically...