TALKING TO MYSELF
Ryan Oakes Lyrics
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I know we're going down
There's whiskey on your lips
But you won't hear me out
I'm talking to myself
Like I'm going insane
You won't hear me out
Why do I still feel this way?
I realise that I've been running from the truth
Had the cards in my hand in a suit
Made a farse but an act was a cue, girl
Eight shots deep in a birthday suit
I'm a player that got played like a flute
She painted love in my head in a fruit
Took me so high with no parachute
Screamed the whole way down but I feel so mute now
I'm the one who's tryna weigh you back to back
Give everything and made you miss the past
I wouldn't press the brakes, you didn't ht the gas
It's funny how the stand still made a collision fast
You try say you're sick of me like stress bro
Then asking me to hang out, baby, yes no
How about we grab a last meal like death row?
Maybe then I could finally learn how to let go, damn
I'm talking to myself
I know we're going down
There's whiskey on your lips
But you won't hear me out
I'm talking to myself
Like I'm going insane
You won't hear me out
Why do I still feel this way?
Six shots in, I got missed calls
Karma really is a bitch whenever it calls
Bloody knuckles from punching out brick walls
Like what the fuck is this for?
I ain't talking straight malls
Heard you put up thick walls, I came in with a sledge shot
I put you in a pen house, you put me on a ledge
Since you are either pissed of, you put me on edge
You gave me cold feet, you walking through my head
Even took away my breath
Now I'm suffocating
Always under pressure and it's over taking
Put in all this effort, you disregard I'm making
Only get your pleasure when my back is breaking
From the weight you expect me to carry
Like Ryan, you happy? I'm very
'Cause if I said our love is buried
How quick you ghost it, it's scary
So I'l keep on swallowing pride 'till I'm drowned in you
So full of shit, how your stomach is growling
Said all that I hear in my ears is the pounding
And my heart gives every alarm, it's been sounding
You put all these walls up, I thought it's your house
But we're fine in public, that shit is astounding
That's why I'm so lonely when we're up in crowd
'Cause that's when the people don't hear that we're shouting
I'm talking to myself
I know we're going down
There's whiskey on your lips
But you won't hear me out
I'm talking to myself
Like I'm going insane
You won't hear me out
Why do I still feel this way?
You bang my line when it's half past nine
And I might just blow my brain
You want that cocked back, with a bad recoil, girl, I might just go Cobain
Go ahead, take eight shots
All the drinks you bought, make sure you feel no pain
Every time you bitch you might burn that bridge
You the match, I'll be the propane
The lyrics to Ryan Oakes's "Talking To Myself" express a sense of desperation, confusion, and frustration. The author notes he's talking to himself and that he knows their relationship is going down. He recognizes the impact of his partner's behavior (there's whiskey on your lips), yet she won't hear him out, leaving him to think he's going insane. He's fully aware of the relationship's deteriorating state, yet he's unsure about how to change the situation.
The second verse is introspective, and the narrative switches to the author talking directly to his love interest. He realizes that he's been running away from the truth and that he's been played. The author feels wronged, acknowledging that she's cold towards him, doesn't hear him out, and has put up walls. Though he's tried everything, he's failed to rekindle the relationship. He's frustrated and angry, having given his all and being left with nothing. He realizes that he still loves her, despite the situation's difficulties.
In summary, the song portrays someone who's stuck in a relationship that's failing, despite his efforts to maintain it. The other person no longer listens, making him feel unheard, and there's a sense of detachment from his partner.
Line by Line Meaning
I'm talking to myself
I am speaking aloud to myself with no one there to listen or respond
I know we're going down
I am aware that our relationship is failing
There's whiskey on your lips
I can smell alcohol on your breath
But you won't hear me out
You are not interested in listening to my perspective
Like I'm going insane
Talking to myself makes me feel like I am losing my grip on reality
Why do I still feel this way?
I am confused as to why I still have strong feelings for you despite our issues
I realise that I've been running from the truth
I acknowledge that I have been avoiding facing the reality of our situation
Had the cards in my hand in a suit
I had control over the situation
Made a farse but an act was a cue, girl
I pretended everything was fine as a signal for you to do the same
Eight shots deep in a birthday suit
I was drunk and vulnerable
I'm a player that got played like a flute
I thought I was in control, but ultimately you had the upper hand
She painted love in my head in a fruit
You made me feel loved and happy
Took me so high with no parachute
You made me feel so good that I didn't think about the consequences
Screamed the whole way down but I feel so mute now
Now that everything has come crashing down, I feel helpless and unable to express my emotions
I'm the one who's tryna weigh you back to back
I am the one trying to reconcile with you
Give everything and made you miss the past
I gave everything I had to try and salvage our relationship, but it didn't work
I wouldn't press the brakes, you didn't ht the gas
I kept trying to make things work, but you weren't doing anything to help
It's funny how the stand still made a collision fast
Our lack of action led to a sudden and intense conflict
You try say you're sick of me like stress bro
You claim to be tired of me like it's a common phrase
Then asking me to hang out, baby, yes no
But then you ask me to spend time with you, sending mixed signals
How about we grab a last meal like death row?
Maybe we should end things for good, like a condemned prisoner's final meal
Maybe then I could finally learn how to let go, damn
Ending things may be the only way for me to move on
Six shots in, I got missed calls
I am drunk and missed your calls
Karma really is a bitch whenever it calls
I am now experiencing the consequences of my actions
Bloody knuckles from punching out brick walls
I am physically hurting myself out of frustration
Like what the fuck is this for?
I am questioning why I am putting myself through this
Heard you put up thick walls, I came in with a sledge shot
You have put up emotional barriers, but I have tried to break them down
I put you in a pen house, you put me on a ledge
I gave you everything, but you left me feeling empty and vulnerable
Since you are either pissed of, you put me on edge
Your anger puts me on edge and makes me nervous
You gave me cold feet, you walking through my head
You made me feel uncertain and confused, constantly on my mind
Even took away my breath
You take my breath away, but also cause me to feel suffocated
Now I'm suffocating
I feel like I'm drowning and can't escape this situation
Always under pressure and it's over taking
I feel like I am constantly under pressure and it is becoming too much to handle
Put in all this effort, you disregard I'm making
I have put in a lot of effort, but you seem to ignore it
Only get your pleasure when my back is breaking
You only seem to be happy when I am struggling or in pain
From the weight you expect me to carry
You have asked me to bear a heavy burden
Like Ryan, you happy? I'm very
You seem to take pleasure in my pain and suffering
'Cause if I said our love is buried
If I were to admit that our love is dead
How quick you ghost it, it's scary
You would quickly leave and disappear, which is frightening
So I'l keep on swallowing pride 'till I'm drowned in you
I will continue to put my pride aside and devote myself to you
So full of shit, how your stomach is growling
You are full of lies, but seem to always be hungry for more
Said all that I hear in my ears is the pounding
All I can hear is my own heart beating heavily
And my heart gives every alarm, it's been sounding
My heart is warning me that this relationship is not healthy
You put all these walls up, I thought it's your house
You have built emotional walls that make me feel like a stranger in our relationship
But we're fine in public, that shit is astounding
We appear happy and functional to others, which is surprising given our issues
That's why I'm so lonely when we're up in crowd
When we're with other people, I feel even more isolated and alone
'Cause that's when the people don't hear that we're shouting
Even when we're in a crowd, our communication is still poor and ineffective
Writer(s): Ryan Oakes
Contributed by Hailey H. Suggest a correction in the comments below.