Chicago rapper/producer Saba first caught the attention of listeners as a frequent collaborator of Chance the Rapper. Saba's contributions to Chance songs like 2013's "Everybody's Something" and 2015's "Angels" showcased his range as both a rapper and vocalist and paved the way for his introspective debut studio album, Bucket List Project, in 2016. The loss of a close family member inspired 2018's Care for Me, a tragically beautiful album that explored death, mourning, and life after losing a loved one.
Saba (Tahj Malik Chandler) grew up on the West Side of Chicago, specifically within the Austin neighborhood, as part of a deeply musical family. That's also where he formed Pivot Gang, a group of longtime associates that has featured, among others, his brother Jerrel (aka Joseph Chilliams), cousin Walter Long (aka John Walt), Logan Yutters (aka MFn Melo), Frsh Waters, and DJ Damnage. Saba recorded several solo mixtapes -- his first were issued while he was an introverted high-schooler -- and gained traction with ComfortZone, a 2014 release inspired by his father's neo-soul recordings that capitalized on his contributions to awareness-raising tracks by fellow Chicagoans Chance the Rapper and Mick Jenkins. In 2015, Saba appeared as featured artist on several cuts, including Chance's "Angels," Jenkins' "Slumber," and Odd Couple's "What Kings Do." Additionally, he released the reflective Tink collaboration "Temporary," one of his most commercial songs to date.
In late 2016, Saba self-released the LP Bucket List Project, featuring artists like fellow Chicagoan rappers Noname and Twista. In February of 2017, Saba's cousin, mentor, and Pivot Gang collaborator Walter Long was violently murdered by a stranger. Saba reflected on the scars left by this horrible loss throughout his second album, CARE FOR ME, which was released in April of 2018. The vulnerable and emotionally complex album broke through with critics and took Saba's music to new audiences. He followed in November of that year with "Beautiful Smile," a collaborative single with Maryland rapper IDK.
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Saba Lyrics
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God forbid i break silence and choose to speak an honest word
I fought so damn hard without anything offered
But the circumstance called for only the best we could do
And it wasn't like i offered you the world
And it wasn't like you offered me the world
Take back those words that you never really meant
And leave me with nothing, i've come back from even less
All the scars that lay bleeding and all the wounds that lay unseen
And my tired hands have seen things you'd dream of
In your nightmares you'd scream from but all i could do
Is keep my head up and pray
That tomorrow's sun would bring a brighter day
That the pain i felt would somehow melt away
Take back those words that you never really meant
And leave me with nothing, i've come back from even less
You held out a promise, said in your love i could have faith
But when i reached out towards you, you pulled away
Was it all a game you played
Every night i pray that your face will fade
So take back those words that you never really meant
And leave me with nothing, i've come back from even less
In this song, Saba recounts the painful experience of a one-sided relationship where he gave his all but received nothing in return. The first verse talks about the fear of breaking silence with an honest word, indicating that there is a lack of communication in the relationship. Despite this, Saba fought hard for the relationship, even though there was nothing offered in return. The circumstance called for only the best they could do, but it wasn't enough, and Saba was left with nothing.
The second verse reveals the emotional turmoil Saba was going through while hiding his scars and wounds from his partner. His tired hands have seen things that would make his partner scream in nightmares. Saba had faith that the tomorrow's sun would bring a brighter day and alleviate the pain he felt. However, the promise made by his partner turned out to be empty, and Saba was left with nothing but the memory of the pain.
In the chorus, Saba asks his partner to take back the words that they never really meant and leave him with nothing. He has come back from even less, indicating that he has been through difficult times, and this experience is nothing new to him. He prays that the memories of his partner will fade from his mind every night, indicating that he is trying to move on from the relationship.
Line by Line Meaning
I would hold my breath just to give you your quiet
I would sacrifice my own breath to keep you in peace.
God forbid I break silence and choose to speak an honest word
I am afraid to speak honestly and break the quietness.
I fought so damn hard without anything offered
I struggled hard without any help or support.
But the circumstance called for only the best we could do
We did our best under the given circumstances.
And it wasn't like I offered you the world
I did not promise you the world and everything in it.
And it wasn't like you offered me the world
You did not promise me the world and everything in it.
Take back those words that you never really meant
Retract the words you said without truly meaning them.
And leave me with nothing, I've come back from even less
After losing everything, I still managed to come back and survive.
I would hide my skin to keep you from seeing
I would conceal myself to avoid showing you my vulnerability and scars.
All the scars that lay bleeding and all the wounds that lay unseen
All the physical and emotional damage that I hide.
And my tired hands have seen things you'd dream of
I have been through things that you can only imagine.
In your nightmares you'd scream from, but all I could do / Is keep my head up and pray / That tomorrow's sun would bring a brighter day
You would be terrified if you experienced what I have, but I have to keep hope for a better future.
That the pain I felt would somehow melt away
I hope that the torment I suffered would eventually fade.
You held out a promise, said in your love I could have faith / But when I reached out towards you, you pulled away
You promised me love and faith, but when I needed you, you turned your back on me.
Was it all a game you played / Every night I pray that your face will fade
Did you manipulate me with your lies? I hope to forget you one day.
So take back those words that you never really meant / And leave me with nothing, I've come back from even less
Undo your false promises, I have already overcome great adversity with very little.
Contributed by Alexis J. Suggest a correction in the comments below.