Dead Cats Don't Meow
The Dolmen Lyrics

If you want to be a pirate
The singer is addressing someone who has expressed a desire to become a pirate.

Then I will tell you how
The singer wants to provide instructions for how to become a pirate.

There is just one golden rule that is
The singer believes that the most important rule for being a pirate is about to be revealed.

Dead cats don't meow
The important rule for being a pirate is that dead cats don't make noise, which is a metaphorical way of saying that the artist believes in extreme brutality and lack of mercy.

And if a man should ask you
The artist anticipates that someone may question how the pirate code can be so ruthless.

How it is you know
This person may question the singer's authority or expertise on the topic of piracy and brutality.

Just look the bastard in the eye
The singer suggests that the best way to deal with such a question is to stare the questioner down with confidence and conviction.

Eric Cobham told you so
The name-drop of Eric Cobham is meant to lend credibility to the artist's authority on the topic of piracy and brutality.

And when their ships go missing
The artist acknowledges that the life of a pirate is not without risks, such as the loss of one's own ship or the suspicion of being responsible for the loss of someone else's ship.

And me who gets the blame
The artist admits that pirates are often blamed for such losses, regardless of whether they are actually culpable.

From old to new found land
The singer suggests that blame for lost ships reaches far and wide, across entire continents and oceans.

No bugger knows my name
The artist remains anonymous, despite having such a notorious reputation for brutality.

Now some folk they call me cruel
The singer acknowledges that not everyone shares their approach to piracy and may even find it distasteful or barbaric.

And others say I am wild
The singer is aware that they are something of a rogue element, taking pleasure in acts of aggression and violence that most would find alarming or terrifying.

Cause I never leave one soul alive
The singer's approach to piracy is one of complete annihilation, leaving no survivors behind.

Not woman, man nor child
The artist's lack of mercy extends to all humans, regardless of age or gender.

And if a parrot looked at me
The artist is so paranoid and ruthless that they even view animals, such as parrots, as potential spies or informants who may reveal their secrets or weaknesses.

And I thought that it might tell
The singer is willing to act preemptively if they feel that even a bird is a potential threat to their authority or reputation.

I grab the bugger by the throat
The singer is willing to take physical action in order to neutralize a potential threat, such as strangling a bird.

And kill it dead as well
The artist has no qualms about killing even a helpless, innocent animal if it poses even the slightest threat to their power or security.