Who Am I
The Quickest Way Out a/k/a Flashlight Lyrics

I watched the proverbial sunrise
I saw a new beginning, a fresh start.

Coming up over the Pacific and
On the horizon, I could see endless possibilities.

You might think I'm losing my mind,
You may believe that I am irrational or crazy.

But I will shy away from the specifics
However, I won't go into detail right now.

'Cause I don't want you to know, where I am
Because if you did, you'd see the worst of me.

'Cause then you'll see my heart
The truth is, if you knew me, you'd see the pain I carry inside.

In the saddest state it's ever been.
I'm not in a good place right now, and it's hard for me to deal with.

This is no place to try and live my life.
I'm not happy, and where I am now is not where I want to be.

Stop right there, that's exactly where I lost it.
I messed up, and that's where everything went wrong.

See that line, well I never should have crossed it.
I made a mistake that I deeply regret, and I wish I could undo it.

Well I never should have said
I shouldn't have verbalized what I was thinking or feeling.

That it's the very moment that I wish that I could take back.
I wish I could go back in time and undo the damage I caused.

I'm sorry for the person I became.
I deeply regret who I was in the past and the mistakes I made.

I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I wish I had realized sooner that I needed to be a better person.

I'm ready to try and never become that way again
I'm committed to changing and growing as a person, and never repeating my past mistakes.

'Cause who I am hates who I've been.
I'm no longer proud of who I was, and I'm determined to be a better person from now on.

I talk to absolutely no one.
I'm alone and don't confide in anyone.

Couldn't keep to myself enough.
I tried to keep my thoughts and feelings to myself, but it became too much.

And the things bottled inside have finally begun
All the emotions I've been suppressing are starting to come to the surface.

To create so much pressure that I'll soon blow up.
It's becoming too much to handle, and I fear that I'll reach my breaking point.

I heard the reverberating footsteps
I heard the sound of fear in my head, like a beating heart.

Sinking up to the beating of my heart,
I'm struggling to keep up with my own fear and anxiety.

And I was positive that unless I got myself together,
I knew that if I didn't change something, I was going to fall apart.

I would watch me fall apart.
I was scared that I would completely lose control and lose myself.

And I can't let that happen again
I can't let myself get to that point again, I need to take control of my life.

And who I am won't take the second chance you gave me.
I don't want to disappoint those who have given me a second chance, I want to be better.

Who I've been only ever made me
I know that the person I used to be was flawed, and I need to leave that person behind.

So sorry for the person I became.
I'm deeply sorry for the way I acted in the past.

So sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I regret that I didn't make the effort to change sooner.

Who I am hates who I've been.
I want to be a better person, and I know that I can change.

Who I am hates who I've been.
I'm not proud of my past, but I'm determined to make a positive change in my life.