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Viral Song
by Toby Turner

Look at little Tim Tim,
tryin' to write a viral song.
He looks little lost.
Guess I can help him along.

What you got, Tim Tim?
Aaahh! My door!

Nevermind that, Tim
I've come to help you,
you won't regret.

Just follow the recipe,
and gather the ingredients.
Pick a topic people
talk about in social media.

Don't violate the terms of service,
or your vid will be deleted.
Also make a catchy chorus.
Something that can be repeated:

Cats, cats,
laughing babies,
People falling,
hot hot ladies.

Sleepy puppies,
dancing babies.
Kittens, monkeys, more hot ladies.
Put a lots of words in one verse.

Careful to enunciate it.
Sing multiple layers,
it helps you if you animate it.

What do you mean? Animate it?
Um, what do you mean, "What do I mean?"
You said animated, what do you mean by that?
(No, No, No) (I don't think I said that at all.)
Yeah, I think you definitely said that.
No, I think I'd remember if I said that, for sure, definitely.
Well what'd you say?
Well I think it was probably something along the lines of, uh...

Cats, cats,
laughing babies.
People falling,
hot hot ladies.

Sleepy puppies,
dancing babies.
Kittens, monkeys, more hot ladies.

Put a lot of words in one verse.
Careful to enu-ci-e-aaaeeah!
Say something educational
so parents lets their kid play it.

Did you now that cashews
come from a fruit? (What?)
D-D-D Did you know that cashews
come from a fruit? (How?)

Ca-Ca-Ca Cashews, cashews,
fru-fru-fru fruit! (What?!)
D-D-D Did you know that? (No...)

Did you know the cashews
come from a fruit? (What?)
D-D-D Did you know the cashews
come from a fruit? (How?)

Cashews, cashews
fru-fru-fru fruit!
D-D-D Did you know that?
I, I said no, I said no... no...

It's OK, Tim, nobody blames you.
Most people don't know the truth
about the cashew.


But now you do so next time
you go to the playground
have anybody gather around
and tell them Tobuscus has taught you...
TEEL'EM!

Did you know that cashews
come from a fruit? (That's right!)
D-D-D Did you know that cashews
come from a fruit?

Ca-Ca-Ca Cashews, cashews
fru-fru-fru fruit!
D-D-D Did you know that?
NOOoooooo!

SING IT!
Cashews, cashews! Come from a fruit!
AGAIN!
Cashews, cashews! Come from a fruit!

LOUDER!
Cashews, cashews! Come from a fruit!
D-D-D Did you know that?
NO!

Ok now, get this stuff out of my parent's house!
No, Tim, you're the one that asked for my help.
I didn't ask you for...(Shhh, you don't have to thank me, Tim Tim.)
Alright, I'm gonna get out of here, I'm gonna upload this to iTunes.
But I thought this was MY viral song!
You thought this was gonna be... Noooo, it's not gonna be viral;
It's a terrible song, I'm telling you to do it yourself,
And that's why I charged you 500 dollars.
We didn't agree on 500 dollars!
AAhhh, your voice is so annoying man, its so annoying.

Contributed by Liliana H. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
To comment on specific lyrics, highlight them.

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