Thoughts
V.A. Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

This right here...
This right here’s for the U50DreamTeam man
Ball Like I’m Kobe man
It was never suppose to be like this but shit
I can’t even lie
5
Bitch you got me fucked up
Cold blooded
I don’t smoke but I feel like getting frost
It’s like
You use to give me warm kisses on the neck in the summer but now it’s winter and all I can feel is frostbite
Face full of attitude but body set nice
I only say it once
I never had to ask twice
I tell my baby talk dirty and she talks right
A bad day was always turned into a good night
Good memories I never knew you was a bad thought
See it’s a game and we playing circles with squares
You were hangin’ wit em hood niggas on the damn block
And I was mood swinging in the o-block
I asked you about em guys you was running around the truth
I caught you on the other end
You should’ve took the other route
You was lying and I thought you was reliable
You was thottin’ undercover all this time it’s undeniable
Damn...
That’s how it falls down
All I do is show teeth I don’t do frowns
You said you never touched roads but you ran a mile
And I can’t fuck with these bitches because they all wild
You can buss it open, I’d rather bustdowns
And if I was wit it, there’d be a man down
I guess you’ll have to man up when you find out in the future I’m the man now
Damn
I smoked away most of my pain and aggression
But before I move on girl I needa just ask you a couple questions
What were your intentions?
Whenever we kissed did you feel a connection?
Was the love you gave me real?
I need to know, was the love you gave me facts or just fiction?
And how about my presence?
When you see me do you ever get that feeling in your stomache?
And what about my present to you on valentine’s day
Fuck, you make me regret it
Did you feel my effort in the letter?
Tell me how you felt was it mocked or respected?
Did it make you shed a tear?
Or did you burst into laughter whenever you read it
I swear when I saw what you said I said fuck all you hoes
I’ma start fucking you hoes
To walk with my feet but to stay on my toes
Treat life like three dice cause the outcome’s unknown
All that time spent overnight on the phone
Was for nothing
And fuck it, I’m sorry for trusting
I hope when I finish this song I feel nothing
Bitch
That’s how it falls down
All I do is show teeth I don’t do frowns
You said you never touched roads but you ran a mile
And I can’t fuck with these bitches because they all wild
You can buss it open, I’d rather bustdowns
And if I was wit it, there’d be a man down
I guess you’ll have to man up when you find out in the future I’m the man now
Damn
That’s how it falls down
All I do is show teeth I don’t do frowns
You said you never touched roads but you ran a mile
And I can’t fuck with these bitches because they all wild
You can buss it open, I’d rather bustdowns
And if I was wit it, there’d be a man down
I guess you’ll have to man up when you find out in the future I’m the man now
Damn
Still my babygirl though
Shoutout to the U50DreamTeam man we ballin’ like we Kobe man
Gang man aye
Gang man aye




aye
Hah

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of V.A.'s song "Thoughts" delve into themes of betrayal, heartbreak, and self-reflection. The song opens with a dedication to the U50DreamTeam, expressing a sense of camaraderie and unity among peers, likening their aspirations to "Ball Like I’m Kobe." The artist reflects on a relationship gone awry, expressing feelings of being deceived and disrespected, as exemplified in the line "Bitch you got me fucked up." This sets the tone for a narrative of disillusionment and hurt.


The lyrics evoke a sense of coldness and detachment, with references to frost and a shift from warm intimacy to frostbite. The artist reminisces on a time when affection and good times turned sour, realizing that what was once seen as good memories were actually rooted in deceit and betrayal. The imagery of circles with squares and hanging with hood individuals conveys a sense of being trapped in a situation that is inherently conflicting and toxic.


The artist grapples with the complexities of love and trust, questioning the sincerity of past gestures and expressions of affection. There is a sense of longing for clarity and closure, as the artist seeks answers to questions about the authenticity of the love they received and the intentions behind their partner's actions. The emotional turmoil is palpable as the artist confronts the pain of feeling deceived and the need to protect oneself from further hurt.


The song concludes with a blend of resignation and defiance, as the artist embraces a newfound sense of independence and self-assurance. Despite the turmoil and heartache experienced, there is a resolve to move forward and assert one's worth and strength. The repeated refrain of "That’s how it falls down" underscores the inevitability of disappointment and betrayal in relationships, while also signaling a readiness to embrace personal growth and empowerment. Through introspection and self-expression, the artist navigates the complexities of love and loss, ultimately finding strength in resilience and self-determination.


Line by Line Meaning

This right here...
This moment right now...


This right here's for the U50DreamTeam man
This is dedicated to my close friends from the U50DreamTeam


Ball Like I'm Kobe man
I'm performing at my best, just like Kobe Bryant


It was never suppose to be like this but shit
Things were not meant to turn out this way, but reality hits hard


I can't even lie
I have to be honest


Bitch you got me fucked up
You have me completely confused and upset


Cold blooded
Unfeeling and ruthless


I don't smoke but I feel like getting frost
I don't usually indulge in smoking, but I feel like numbing my senses


It's like
It feels like


You use to give me warm kisses on the neck in the summer but now it's winter and all I can feel is frostbite
Our relationship used to be warm and loving, but now it's cold and painful


Face full of attitude but body set nice
You have a strong attitude, but your appearance is still appealing


I only say it once
I will only say it once


I never had to ask twice
I never needed to ask again


I tell my baby talk dirty and she talks right
I ask my partner to be provocative, and she complies


A bad day was always turned into a good night
Even when a day was rough, we always ended it on a positive note


Good memories I never knew you was a bad thought
I never realized that our good memories were actually deceptive


See it's a game and we playing circles with squares
Life is like a game where we try to fit in where we don't belong


You were hangin' wit em hood niggas on the damn block
You were associating with people from the streets in that neighborhood


And I was mood swinging in the o-block
I was experiencing mood swings and emotional instability


I asked you about em guys you was running around the truth
I questioned you about the men you were involved with, but you avoided the truth


I caught you on the other end
I discovered your deceitful actions


You should've took the other route
You should have chosen a different path


You was lying and I thought you was reliable
You were dishonest, and I believed you were trustworthy


You was thottin' undercover all this time it's undeniable
You were secretly engaging in promiscuous behavior, and now it's undeniable


Damn...
Expressing frustration and disappointment


That's how it falls down
That's how it all comes crashing down


All I do is show teeth I don't do frowns
I hide my true emotions, always putting on a smile


You said you never touched roads but you ran a mile
You claimed to be innocent, but you actually went a long way


And I can't fuck with these bitches because they all wild
I can't deal with these women who are all reckless and unpredictable


You can buss it open, I'd rather bustdowns
You can be sexually open, but I prefer lavish items


And if I was wit it, there'd be a man down
If I was involved, there would be consequences


I guess you'll have to man up when you find out in the future I'm the man now
You will have to face reality when you realize I have moved on and become stronger


Still my babygirl though
Despite everything, you were still special to me


Shoutout to the U50DreamTeam man we ballin' like we Kobe man
I want to acknowledge and appreciate my friends from the U50DreamTeam, as we excel like Kobe Bryant


Gang man aye
Expressing camaraderie and unity


Hah
An expression of amusement or disbelief




Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid
Written by: David Usifoh

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
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Most interesting comments from YouTube:

@kevinhendrix8786

Clay, thanks for your service in uniform, as well as in civvies. The info and service you provide is invaluable and you have helped hundreds or maybe thousands of vets. I do have some additional info about psych claims that may help some of your viewers. I recently helped a friend do a psych claim and he went from 0% to 70% rather quickly. That extra money really helped him and how he can stop worrying about finances and start taking care of his mental health.

With the psych claim, I found out that you do not need a diagnosis for a general psych disorder claim. For PTSD-specific claims, you DO need a diagnosis. But general psych disorder, you just need a C&P exam to diagnosis you and establish a Nexus. Looks like the VA finally realized that a lot of vets who need psych help do not reach out to get help and therefore do not seek help and therefore do not have a diagnosis from a mental health care provider.

So what we did for his claim, we filed a standard claim for general psychological disorder (I think that was the term). I helped him write up all the details about the specific incidents from his deployments, as well as very specific details about his current mental health. We also got a couple of witness letters from an ex-spouse and a family member and submitted those with his claim. I think those were probably very helpful as they documented his personality changes following deployments.

We submitted the claim (with the witness letters) and then he got notice of a C&P exam with a psychiatrist. He watched a lot of videos from you and other youtube channels offering C&P advice for psych exams. Just like you said - be honest, open, and vulnerable. From what my friend told me, those were truly the keys. But you have to be extremely honest about your symptoms. I know, military people do not like to admit to any weaknesses or vulnerabilities. But this is the one time where you truly need to do it. Open up like you are confessing to St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. If you drink yourself to sleep every night because you are too stressed or depressed to sleep, then tell them. If you had a violent domestic episode after a deployment that went unreported, tell them. If you have to get up 5 times a night to check doors and windows, tell them. If you have considered suicide, tell them. If you get fired from a lot of jobs for your behavior, tell them. If you engage in risky sexual activity, tell them. You need to admit things to this C&P examiner that you would never even tell your closest friend because you would be ashamed or embarrassed. If you are not coming out of the exam crying, or nearly crying, you probably were not open enough. As a note, it is much better for your claim if you did not have psych issues before your joined/or deployed. If your current issues are the same ones you had before you joined, they will not make it service connected. You have to be honest, but no need to offer up information that maybe your childhood was messed up.

So I took my friend up to his C&P, he was in there about 90 minutes and came out with puffy eyes and told me a lot about what had happened. He got lucky, his C&P examiner made a pretty good assessment early on and when she could see my friend was evading an embarrassing answer, she pushed him to get the answer she needed to justify his claim.

TLDR version - if you need help, ask for it. Be honest about why you need it.



@TheCivDiv

You’re actually at 79%.
70% mental health
30% GERD

100-70=30
30% of 30 (remainder) is about 9%.
So your rating is 79%.
Which means your remainder is 21.

So if you got a rating 10%…it would be 10% of 21. Which is about 2% and would put you at 81% overall.

Hope that clears it up - probably not 😂

- Clay



@Hohmies86

Ha!
I have to let my brain fack with me to the highest degree before any of the negative thoughts will go away

The more I resist, the more they will persist

I have NO friends, just took a pay decrease of $4 in order to keep my job and not get fired for “hostile work environment”

My wife and kids say “but we’re not Marines”

Breaking things in the house is way better than putting my hands on someone

I’ve been to prison, rehab, many different jobs and fortunately I went back to college immediately after EAS, if I would’ve waited at all then I probably would’ve never went.

Does anyone else not get calls to hang out with co workers outside of work too…

I just justify it by saying “I rather be as far away from people and public as possible!”



@TheCivDiv

I love this comment, and in I agree with most of this. But...sometimes Veterans, myself included, do NOT know or understand how to articulate what the heck is going on with them.
Q: How are you today?
A: I'm doing great.

Q: What can you tell me about this event?
A: Ah, it happened, nothing really, blah blah blah.

Now these are barney style examples but...Veterans should explain their symptoms. I would also caution anyone from insinuating that a Veteran 'preparing for a C&P Exam' is attempting to lie, or game the system. That's a slippery slope.

- Clay



@MrAkrei

I really need help I with this I was in 2007 - 11 was screwed out of taps class because of the duty driver and just now just went to the vso because I didn't know I was able to make a claim after the fact.

What can be considered disability? I have insomnia amongst other things

How do I prove its service connected? I was young didn't got to med for much

Is the vso there to help me or are they gonna tell me to figure it out myself?

There more I'm just really lost with all of this.



@TheCivDiv

@@johncasper8193 Brother, this couldn't be more wrong. Combat has just about nothing to do with VA Disability. Think of someone who experienced sexual trauma from their superiors...they probably have severe mental health disabilities.

Think of all the infantry dudes that didn't see combat yet rucked miles and miles with flak/kevlar, rifle, weapon system who now have foot conditions, and a crushed spine.

Think of someone who was airborne who landed wrong and broke their back...they probably have a back condition.

Not only would these Veterans have these disabilities, but these disabilities would inhibit THE REST OF THEIR LIFE. Not to mention, their families, wives and kids, also suffer from these disabilities.

Point being...I would probably let the VA adjudicate a Veterans claim that must be proven with an in-service event, a current dx and most importantly a nexus either medical or presumptive in nature...versus 'some dude commenting on YouTube'.

No shade your way, brother. But I would caution from making wild accusations.

- Clay



@TheCivDiv

Dr. Sharma is a Board Certified Psychiatrist and USAF Veteran who writes IMOs/DBQs for mental health conditions and conditions related to mental health.

His contact info is…
Prashant.sharma2@concisepsych.com

Here is a live we had together.
https://www.youtube.com/live/2C6oEJNlZuI?feature=share

- Clay



All comments from YouTube:

@lauraestes9304

I just got 70. I think the 35 years of addiction and depression and last 5 years of seeing Drs and therapists and social workers and the stack of medical information i accumulated basically spoke for itself. You are right....i have zero relationships with family or friends. I have extreme difficulty even having conversations with most people. The rating has changed my finances considerably thank God.

@TheCivDiv

I’m glad you were finally rated and it’s helped you so much!! Don’t forget the healthcare side of the house.

- Clay

@kenross9026

Same here , just got 70 percent for PTSD,,, of course denied for lots of other stuff. Have a claim for sleep apnea. Have a diagnosis for it letters from spouse,brother and a fellow Marine brother. what else would help with this ? Of course when it started I was active duty but not knowing what it was didn't really think on it to much. How can I get a Nexus letter or do I need one . Help in this would be great

@TheCivDiv

@@kenross9026 for sleep apnea statements aren’t going to do anything. You have the diagnosis, the question is what’s your evidence from service? Did you get a sleep study while active? If not, you might want to consider secondary to PTSD.

- Clay

@kenross9026

@@TheCivDiv thanks for that maybe that's the best action going forward. My C&P for it is the 13th of September .

@BOtto23

How long from your C&P to your rating? I talked to the DAV yesterday and they said my examiner put in a lot for me but she hasn’t submitted her opinion yet. Hoping to get 70% minimum. Time will tell

10 More Replies...

@teddynall4158

I got a 70% from my c&p exam. I was at 90% prior. I am now 100 p&t. Clay, you have a very beautiful family, brother. You've been blessed, mightily. Stay awesome!👊🏼🤜🏼🤛🏼🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

@TheCivDiv

HEEYYYOOOOO! Congrats to you and yours!

- Clay

@keithshep

As usual, you have hit it out of the ballpark Clay! I thank you and appreciate all you have done.

@TheCivDiv

Thank YOU!!

- Clay

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