out of me
Above & Beyond Lyrics

My heart stopped beating
I experienced a moment of intense emotional pain or shock.

Then every time, it starts again
Despite the pain, I am resilient and able to recover, ready to face new challenges.

Like a factory machine
My ability to bounce back and keep going is like the mechanism of a machine, efficient and unstoppable.

I'm a factory machine
I see myself as a product of this process, strong and functional but perhaps lacking in emotions.

And every time, and every time I think, I'm lost
Despite my strength and resilience, I often feel uncertain and directionless.

I retire from the game board
When I feel lost or overwhelmed, I sometimes withdraw from life and social interactions.

But I have to respect its players
Even though I may feel disconnected from society, I understand that there are still people around me who deserve my respect and consideration.

And I don't know, and I don't know
My feelings of uncertainty and confusion are persistent and ongoing.

And I don't know if it is me
I struggle to understand the source of my feelings or how to overcome them.

Or if they're the ones than I would
I wonder if my struggles are due to my own shortcomings or to external circumstances beyond my control.

Never understand
My feelings and experiences may be difficult for others to comprehend or relate to.

I have difficulties accepting myself
I struggle with self-doubt and self-criticism.

As much as accepting the others
My struggles with self-acceptance sometimes spill over into difficulties accepting others as they are.

I hate you
My negative feelings extend to others, including feelings of anger or resentment.

As much as I hate myself
I have a high level of self-loathing, which may contribute to my struggles with others and with life in general.

Empty bodies, ghosts without feelings
I see myself and those around me as lacking in emotions or depth, perhaps feeling disconnected from the world and others.

My place will never be here
I feel like I don't belong in my current surroundings or situation.

My mind will always be somewhere else
I often feel distracted or distant, as if my mind is elsewhere.

I make you turn round and round
Despite my sense of detachment, I have a way of making others feel caught up in my struggles or uncertainty.

Without ever making you dance
Ultimately, I feel like I'm not really able to inspire or empower others, even when I try.

So just leave me out
I withdraw from others, preferring to be alone and disconnected from society.

I Break my bones, my skin, this tree in me
I feel like I'm struggling with deep, almost physical issues that are hard to articulate.

Forgive me for having seen what I saw
I feel like I'm carrying a lot of emotional weight, and I sometimes feel guilty for things I've seen or experienced.

Forgive me for having lived
I feel like my existence is a burden, and I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to be here.

Just a pile of ash, a bit of dust
I feel insignificant and unimportant, as if I'm just a small and fleeting part of the world.

No more lust
I feel like my passions or desires have faded, leaving me feeling empty or directionless.

I would not apologize this time
I'm tired of feeling guilty or ashamed about who I am or what I've done.

I would accept all of this
Instead, I'm trying to come to terms with my struggles and accept myself as I am.