Avrigus are a 2 piece gothic doom metal band from Sydney, Australia. The ba… Read Full Bio ↴Avrigus are a 2 piece gothic doom metal band from Sydney, Australia. The band is composed of Simon Gruer (ex-Cruciform) and Judy Chiara. They play epic and majestic gothic doom metal with dark ambient passages.

Avrigus first came into existence in 1990. Due to Simon's role in Cruciform and the Sydney metal scene it wasn't until 1998 that the very well received EP The Final Wish was released on Warhead Records. In 2001 the album The Secret Kingdom was released on Well of Urd Records, a division of the now-defunct Hammerheart Records.

In 2007 it was announced that Judy had left the band late in the previous year. Despite this Simon is continuing on with Avrigus and a new album called "The Hidden Citadel" is in the works. It was announced in August 2009 that Avrigus' new vocalist would be Megan Robins, whose partner Lee Tassaker (bassist/vocalist for Lycanthia) would also be providing vocals on the new album.

The Final Wish and The Secret Kingdom can be downloaded from their official site via BitTorrent.

3rd Of May 2010, the band announced that they will be releasing an EP called "Beauty And Pain" as a precursor to the album "The Hidden Citadel". "Beauty And Pain" will consist of 5 tracks with a running time of approximately 30 minutes.

Beauty and Pain
Avrigus Lyrics

Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴

Deep in the night, it came to me
Torturing silently
Try; but I cant seem to ever break free
From what is haunting me

Deep paranoia
It tears apart my heart
But in my soul

It's all I've ever known

I cut all of the hate I feel
My blood shed and revealed
All that has been wrong with me
The more I feel; the more I ache
I cant go back
I fear more of life's beauty than pain

Thought's wouldn't stop playing upon my mind
Taunting me with what I'd find
Try; but I cant seem to ever break free
From what is haunting me

Deep paranoia
It tears apart my heart
But in my soul
It's all I've ever known

I cut all of the hate I feel
My blood shed and revealed
All that has been wrong with me
The more i need; the more I take
I cant go back
I fear more of life's beauty than pain

Once I believed
And I'd dream of a place
Where the weight of it all
Couldn't harm me
Now I know and I feel
This could never be real
On this path I walk alone

I cut all of the hate I feel
My blood shed and revealed
All that has been wrong with me
The more I see; the more I hate
I cant go back
I fear more of life's beauty than
All of the hate I feel
My blood shed and revealed
All that has been wrong with me
The more I breathe, the more I break

I cant go back
I feel all of life's beauty and pain

Overall Meaning

The song "Beauty and Pain" by Avrigus is a hauntingly beautiful piece that delves into the struggles of the human mind. The first verse speaks of a feeling of being trapped, with something dark and brooding lurking within the depths of the mind. The deep paranoia that the singer experiences is tearing apart their heart, and they know that it's all they've ever known. The second verse carries on this theme, with the constant taunting and tormenting thoughts that refuse to leave the mind. The singer is unable to break free from the haunting thoughts that continue to haunt them, causing them endless pain.

The chorus speaks of the sacrifice that the singer makes in order to try and alleviate the pain. They cut all of the hate they feel, and their blood is shed and revealed in the process. Despite this, the more they need and take, the more they are consumed by the never-ending darkness that plagues their mind. Finally, the third verse speaks of the hope that once existed within the singer. They used to dream of a place where they could escape the weight of it all, but now they know that this is an impossibility. They walk alone, knowing that they can never go back to the way things used to be.

Line by Line Meaning

Deep in the night, it came to me
The singer experiences intense emotional distress and realizes the reality of their troubled emotions.

Torturing silently
The pain that the singer feels is not visible to others, it exists only in their mind and heart.

Try; but I cant seem to ever break free
Despite making an effort to overcome their troubles, the singer is unable to escape their distress due to it being deeply rooted within them.

From what is haunting me
The source of the singer's pain is a recurring thought or memory that cannot be easily forgotten.

Deep paranoia
The singer's emotional distress causes them to become paranoid; they may fear that others are judging them or that something terrible will happen.

It tears apart my heart
The emotional strain that the singer feels is so extreme that it causes them physical pain.

But in my soul, It's all I've ever known
The singer has been living with this emotional distress for so long that it has become a part of them and they cannot imagine life without it.

I cut all of the hate I feel
The singer tries to cope with their pain by self-harm, hoping that the physical pain will distract them from the emotional distress they feel.

My blood shed and revealed
By engaging in self-harm, the singer makes their pain apparent to others for the first time.

All that has been wrong with me
The singer has been blaming themselves for their emotional distress, believing that they are at fault.

The more I feel; the more I ache
Feeling emotions causes the singer more pain, rather than the catharsis that they hoped for.

I cant go back
The singer realizes that they cannot undo past events that have led them to this level of emotional distress.

I fear more of life's beauty than pain
The singer is scared of the good things in life as they may lead to even greater emotional pain in the future.

Thought's wouldn't stop playing upon my mind
The singer is tormented by their thoughts, which won't leave them alone despite their attempts to distract themselves.

Taunting me with what I'd find
The thoughts that the singer is plagued with are mocking and sinister, making it harder for them to find peace.

Once I believed; And I'd dream of a place; Where the weight of it all; Couldn't harm me
The singer used to believe that somewhere existed where they could escape their pain and be truly happy.

Now I know and I feel; This could never be real
The singer has given up on the idea of being completely happy, believing that it is an unattainable dream.

On this path I walk alone
The singer has resolved themselves to deal with their pain alone; they cannot rely on others to understand or solve their problems.

The more i need; the more I take
The singer's emotional distress only gets worse, no matter how much they try to fix it.

I feel all of life's beauty and pain
The singer acknowledges that there are both good and bad things in life and that they must accept both in order to move forward.

Contributed by Luke G. Suggest a correction in the comments below.

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TRACKS