BBC Radio 5 live - Now We're Talking

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BBC Radio 5 live is the BBC's radio service providing live BBC News, phone-ins, and sports commentaries. It is the principal radio station covering sport in the United Kingdom, broadcasting virtually all major sports events staged in the UK or involving British competitors.

The BBC Podcasts Directory lists 20 active podcasts under BBC Radio 5 Live.

Kermode & Mayo's Film Reviews are often the most popular podcast from BBC Radio 5 live.

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01Kermode: Tarantino's new film, 14 Aug 09

02Kermode: Watchmen, 06 Mar 09

03Kermode: Terminator Salvation, 5 Jun 09

04Kermode: Star Trek, 08 May 09

05Kermode: Avatar and Sherlock Holmes, 18 Dec 09

06Kermode: The Invention of Lying, 02 Oct 09

07Kermode: The Hangover, 12 Jun 09

08Kermode: The Twilight Saga: New Moon, 20 Nov 09

09Kermode: The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus, 16 Oct 09

10Kermode: The Men Who Stare At Goats, 06 Nov 09

11Kermode: Angels & Demons, 15 May 09

BBC Radio 5 Live

12Kermode: Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince, 17 Jul 09

13Kermode: Antichrist, 24 Jul 09

14Kermode: State of Play, 24 Apr 09

15Kermode: 2012, 13 Nov 09

16Kermode: Paranormal Activity, 27 Nov 09

17Kermode: The Boat That Rocked, 03 Apr 09

18Kermode: The Infidel, Kick-Ass, Clash of the Titans & Remember Me, 2 Apr 10

19Kermode: Marley And Me, 13 Mar 09

20Kermode: Where The Wild Things Are, 11 Dec 09

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Kermode: Angels & Demons 15 May 09
BBC Radio 5 Live Lyrics

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The lyrics are frequently found in the comments by searching or by filtering for lyric videos

Comments from YouTube:

joe mcnab

3y↑116

Classic Kermode. Who's still watching this from the good doctor 11 years on?

Tony Castle

3y↑3

David Nash

3y↑9

I go through these classic videos every few months.

Alisaurus 42

2y↑2

*prequels Obi-wan voice* Hello there

drdarkeny

2y↑2

I'm re-watching it just for the sheer joy of a prime Kermodian rant.

Ale Chats

2y↑3

me too, this is amazing

1 More Replies...

Tymbus

5y↑110

Ewan McGregor's helicopter parachute jump over the Vatican is one of the funniest scenes I have ever seen, well worth the price of admission. I am laughing even as I write this.

Grainne Mhaol

I watched the movie thanks to these reviews and the phrase "parachuting pontiffs" that came up somewhere. I can't tell you how stupider the movie was than I expected

Andy G

8y↑295

This review was so powerful with righteous fury that it revived a man from a coma - I'm not even joking, look it up.

Stabot

8y↑39

+Andy G I just looked that story up and I still can't believe that it's real.

Tom Jones

7y↑21

I think it was The Da Vinci Code review that supposedly brought about a bloke from his coma. He shouts a bit louder in that one.

Andy G

Chazbot obvious bait

Andy G

7y↑6

Lol I misread "Trot" as "thot" 😂 my apologies

Sheepception

6y↑6

Thought he was a Christian...

3 More Replies...

Marc George Stewart

5y↑24

Ten years since this review came out and it's still fun to listen to

Steven

14y↑174

Dan Brown writes sentences like "The famous man looked at the red cup."

Keith Fraser

6y↑15

For anyone who thinks this is a joke, the opening sentence of The Da Vinci Code is like this.

Wamblecropt

5y↑30

'The man's hand hit my nice face'.

metalthrashingmatt 2814

4y↑15

Steven “the 75 year old man died a painful death on the green table”

Happy SpaceInvader

4y↑12

Keith Fraser It is also a Stewart Lee joke.

RC 591

@Keith Fraser I have the book
next to me and it doesn't say that.

3 More Replies...

Sarah S

9y↑71

We've got a film review AND a literary critic for the price of one. Brilliant.

allaboutdmagic

12y↑113

Love Ewan MaGregor's Irish-Polish-Spanish-Russian accent there.

TheKamikazenaz

4y↑19

All of them living within a mile of Perth.

Arishok Qunari

As far as I can tell he didn't speak with any accent there.

L W

3y↑1

Bit of American thrown in for a second too.

drdarkeny

McGregor obviously got his Italian accent from the same place Bill Scott got his Boris Badenov one.

Matt7895

11y↑7

Ewan McGregor's accent in this still makes me grin like a madman every time I hear it.

StopTheMadness

7y↑24

Listening to your wonderful rant is a lot more interesting than watching the silly movie.

Steven

15y↑43

"You are a man of great faith. You believe, though you have not seen." Genius!

Richie

4y↑5

I've seen this film, and Mark is right. The smoke up the chimney bit is proper slapstick and Tom Hanks trying his best to look serious while he's doing it. Its proper mission impossible, we must keep this smoke going up the chimney at all costs. It's hilarious. And that joke at the end of the video was really funny

SIGNIFYING NOTHING

10y↑30

I liked the movie, solely for the fact that we got to see Tom Hanks in a speedo.

Tom A

The cuts back to an increasingly dumbfounded Simon are gold.

azz06urro

11y↑5

Brilliant!!..the best Kermode rant of all time, cuts me up every time :)

JamesOhGoodie

13y↑10

In that clip Ewan McGregor is still deciding on his accent WHILE delivering his lines!

Sean Organ

9y↑21

Antimatter is identical to the matter that we see around us. However, the only difference is that antimatter is oppositely charged. Therefore, when matter and antimatter come into contact with each other they will cancel each other out and thus cause an annihilation. This would produce photons.

drdarkeny

5y↑1

Which asks the musical questions - how the HELL do you store it?!?!?!?!??!?!? I know the book comes up with a bit of Using Pym Particles to Reverse the Polarity of the Neutron Dilithium Crystals, but I gather the movie (I tried watching it on cable & nodded off partway through) doesn't do a very convincing job of explaining....

NovaStalker

13y↑5

I'm amazed how few views this has had. It's a classic review.

sunside7

2y↑1

I love coming back to these reviews to hear Mark's hilariously engaging rants!

Richard

11y↑13

I fuckin love this film , in the future this film will be held up as the zenith of unintentional comedy. Its pure gold.

Mike Gloady

3y↑5

I'm in the future. It is.

Meinderd de Vries

14y↑2

Good review. I loved the book a couple of years ago, as I loved The Da Vinci Code before it, simply by forgetting how silly the whole plot is. It's also amazingly exciting. Trying to realize all this into a movie just won't work since you can actually see and hear how silly it all is. The book at least told the silly story at a decent pace and i was able to go with it. Stuff like this should be read, not seen, as you would believe even less of it.

John 9

15y↑2

This guy is freaking great. Nobody this right on and entertaining in the states.

wayne henriksen

7y↑30

"It's Mission Impossible Goes to the Vatican with Star Trek and Thunderbirds thrown In." Genius.

Kevon

2y↑1

Great video. The Da Vinci Code is one of the funniest movies ever made. A&D isn’t as “good” but still a fun ride.

Tactictoe

8y↑57

oh, Ewan McGregor's accent is bloody priceless.

pete lawd

8y↑3

I've heard worse Northern Irish accents to be fair, but it's still not great lol

Grainne Mhaol

@pete lawd It makes no sense given that he was raised largely in Italy.

Luvie1980

12y

Kevin Kline is very good actor, completely under rated in my opinion.

estd1759

2y↑2

Still funny 13 years later

Treblaine

15y↑1

Kermode later (or was it earlier) mentioned in a podcast that though A&D was utterly stupid, it was still passably entertaining and alluded that it was not films like this that were pushing him towards retiring from his film critic career but another film called "Bride Wars" or something.

Anthony Bradley

2y↑2

Armin Mueller-Stahl being described as an actor hired to fufill a "non-specifically european character" i just laughed out loud, it's just so true.

Steinar Christensen

15y

I think the movie was great. A perfect mix of symbols and ancion and overall very good. I know it is very unlikely for this to happen, but it's a movie! What do we have movies for!?

LR Buxton

8y↑1

I actually quite enjoyed this, it was a bit more pacey & thrilling than The Da Vinci Code. But Mark is right, the accents are bizarre and the plot like something out of Star Trek. Not a classic, but diverting enough.

David Simpson

4y↑27

i would watch angels and demons if Tom Hanks character was called Robert Dingy-Dong

Michael O'Neill

10y

For whatever it's worth, I also could not get through the first 40 pages of The DaVinci Code, but I sped through the Angels and Demons book, and thoroughly enjoyed it.

matafuko

12y

I've read three Dan Brown books precisely because they were terrible. I just couldn't believe it, I couldn't put them down - they're just hilarious in their ineptitude!

Ezra Sky

7y↑34

"The first hour is as boring as ever... even though they're doing the running and explaining.. with the less bad haircut, the little bit after that snore inducingly bad..but the last forty minutes are laugh out loud funny."

psionicman

13y↑9

"the unknown illuminati master?" has got to be the most cumbersome phrase i've ever heart

pussycat niffums

15y↑1

I remember when kermode was reviewing Atonement he said he'd read and loved the book. In terms of dumbness Brown takes Mcewan hands down.

Robert Slaughter

I feel like people who hear this stuff on the radio are missing a lot.

Elliot Newton

13y↑2

I feel better already, this rant really can create miracles

Elliot Newton

4y↑2

Nine years later im revisiting this after actually watching the movie

Vivek Iyer

@Elliot Newton how have these 11 years been?

Elliot Newton

@Vivek Iyer Aye, it's been alright. I managed to survive the deadly plague that ravaged the Earth. Little did 19-year-old me know what was in store. How about you?

Tessmage Tessera

3y↑2

Well, The Da Vinci Code was a fun movie. I especially loved the 100% adorable Audrey Tatou. This sequel, on the other hand, was pure brain rot. Just milking the cow... and the milk was sour.

Gary Cheshire

7y↑57

"The Mullet Of Robert Dingy-Dong", somebody please make that film

Tal Moore

11y↑1

What I meant is that if we had the equivalent mass of anti-matter to matter that would normally be required for a small nuclear weapon (i.e. about a basketball size ball of Uranium 238) the size of the matter/anti-matter explosive would dwarf the nuclear explosion by orders of magnitude. Far more than double or triple the size.

slimjimpui

15y

Never get Ewan to do a different accent, unless it's a comedy

Andy G

8y↑63

5:52 "Are you saying this is not a true story?"

godlessfather

15y

I agree with everything the guy said about Dan Brown... He has as much talent as Heather Graham has... And that's saying something... They both write like 13 year-olds...

KruppaF

13y↑8

bless ewan mcgregor, i love him but this monologue is hilarious:D

jaydy71

10y↑15

I thought the 'running and explaining' thing was already done much better in The Terminator.

Appolo Bozec

9y↑12

jaydy71 What about pointing?

crypto hodler

@Appolo Bozec this is great comment, hahahaha, revolutionary pointing concept

Mac Intosh

fun that mark alludes to “mission impossible goes to the vatican”, a plotline that was featured in mission impossible 4 a couple of years later!

Team Bombersports

10y↑31

Anyone else get a Father Ted vibe from the Ewan McGregor clip with the pictures of the priests and so forth?

Humble Scribe

3y↑1

He DID kick me up the arse!

Ciaran Irwin

14y↑2

Very well observed by Mayo, Kermode's description was a bit Izzard-esque

Hapax legomenon

"I'm gonna play you another clip." - "Oh good." 😄😅😂

Ed F

14y

0:37-0:46 is just flat out hilarious

Joe Smythe

15y

He got through more of The DaVinci Code more than I did, I couldn't get through twenty pages of that literary excrement.

The Howler

15y↑1

i agree with him....i was furious after seeing the movie....i couldn't stop ranting for like an hour....i think the only reason they tampered with the story of the book is so that the church wont get offended...and it was funny...the end was shocking and funny!

Andrew Page

3y↑4

I've seen these films. Mark Kermode's reviews of Dan Brown films are much more entertaining than the films. And they are a lot shorter.

Lucy Ingram

8y↑45

'The running and explaining with the less bad haircut' :-D

Freshedmupdates Edm

6y↑1

I feel it quite helpfull to have the plot explained basicly if i'am stupid.... wich I AM. hahahahahahahahahahhahahahaahha Simon Mayo is abseloutly brilliant

Mark Roberts

13y

@sulijoo I believe in the book he explains that the anti-matter is being held in place by two opposing magnets or something, and as the canister has been stolen from the CERN labs it had limited battery power for the magnets, and once they ran out, ka-boom etc.

Nick L

This film sounds amazing

Neon Radar

14y↑1

It's quite awkward WITHOUT Mayo, he sorta represents the not-so-literate moviegoing public.

Liam Goodenough

The plot sounds like something out of the mind of Alan Partridge

Arishok Qunari

Ewan McGregors character grew up in Italy since the age of 9. So he wasn't around any Irish people since then. No surprise that he doesn't speak with the accent you want from him. Actually it is surprising that he doesn't sound more italian. But irish accent is clearly misplaced here

uz1l0v3r

12y

I can't. I fell asleep after about 30 minutes and then deleted the movie, which I'd downloaded. I want to see it again, just for the ending.

JoviAlways98

15y

Tbh I thought Ewan wasnt doing an accent lol. I knew he was supposed to be Irish even though the original character was Italian or whatever but in the the film it was just Ewan's normal accent except when he said "senori" or whatever. Don't get me wrong, I'm not criticising him, I adore Ewan McGregor, he's my favourite actor, that's why I was like grrrr when Kermode brought his accent up lol. At least he was doing his normal accent rather than a bad Irish one lol..

minimalist34

14y↑8

"it is intergalatically stupid" hahahahahaha

azz06urro

11y

I was a bit down today, but this has picked me right up!! The Ewan McGregor clip (6.03) is hilarious...what accent is he using lol

David Rennie

Ewan sounds sometimes like the Eric Liddell character in Chariots of Fire

RamBam3000

11y

Antimatter wouldn't explode in any conventional sense. What happens is that it would annihilate an equal amount of matter in a flash of gamma rays.

David P

4y↑3

I want a Dr. Bob Dingydong mullet for my upcoming adult photoshoot.

Tin Machine

3y↑1

Dr Robert dingy dong, always cracks me up

Tin Machine

Ditto

Ben Bacharach

4y↑2

“Its mission impossible going to the vatican”

...but Mission Impossible did go to the Vatican

Arishok Qunari

He is very funny and entertaining, but I have to disagree. I like the movie very much. It's fast paced, thrilling, has a surprising twist at the end (which wasn't necessary), great music and some interesting facts about caatholic Rome

dananddanfilms

15y

Thing is, I rather like the sound of his voice too. So it's clearly just a matter of taste.

TheHappydead

14y

I was once ranting about the awful shit dan brown is allowed to call writing only to be told by not 1 but 2 good friends that 'nah it aint that bad mate , its actually pretty good' I couldnt bring myself to point out the gaping flaws in there argument, now instead i keep a little bit of secret hatred for them at the back of my mind . i hate mayo but 'the kermode/ mayo' combo is rather charming

NPA1001

50w

I believe this is the review that revived a dying man.

Zulu Romeo

3y↑1

Put 0:26 on the poster

"Dan Brown is brilliant!" - Mark Kermode, BBC radio 5 Live

D Wnright

I watched this treating it more like a Batman or Spiderman film. If you take it for what it is (a load of old non-sense), it's actually quite enjoyable. Agree on the explaining part. But doesn't annoy me too much.

ladylilith06

15y

GI priest funnist part in a movie i have seen in years, random and stupid, movie over all laugh most of the time through it ^ - ^

Drew Campbell

3y↑11

I live quite near Crieff, where Ewan is from. We all speak like that up here, after six or seven drams.

theyetidude

14y↑7

"This movie is so The Thunderbirds" - lol

Anti-Nihilist Entertainment

not knowing what is antimatter is bad enough but also not understanding that the whole plot was LITERALLY planned by someone in the story makes me think he didn't watch the movie but only the trailer. Why didn't he consider that everything in the movie WASN'T happening by sheer coincidence?

Mark Sieving

8y↑3

Well, if the plot of the movie was planned by a fictional character, that's generally a bad sign. It's better if the plot is planned by the writer.

The Howler

12y

hoping this can save more lifes

Anna Henderson

2y↑1

I agree with everything Mark is saying, it is the stupidest film ever. However, I must have watched it 10+ times and I will absolutely be watching it another 10 times. Ewan jumping out that helicopter floats my boat every time!

Redswipe

15y

I thought the novel was far better than Da Vinci Code.

pricklyphlox

8y↑13

Any combination of words turns out to be a post punk band. Watch: Dirty Carrot. Canteen Purple. Dog Algebra.

Gary Cheshire

7y↑3

Ambidextrous Whisk

Not Dave's Channel

4y↑2

Pleistocene Overkill Hypothesis. Salient Mountain. 27 Hours of North Korean Television.

Widespoon

3y↑1

I'd say Fiat Lux are more new wave/synth pop

James Luby

Some fine actors do their best with Dan Brown's arse gravy, but the last half an hour or so is worth waiting for, idiotic and hilarious... 🤣

steve matis

15y

the best part of this review is reading the comments of people who defend hack writers like dan brown, not to mention people so insecure about their own half pined opinions that they will take it all out on the good doctor, who is, AS USUAL, completely correct in his assessment of an obviously vapid and mindlessly stupid movie. KERMODE FOR THE WIN, YET AGAIN.

Veeevo28

12y

Love that this got a guy from a coma.

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Kermode: Angels & Demons 15 May 09BBC Radio 5 Live Lyrics

joe mcnab

Tony Castle

David Nash

Alisaurus 42

drdarkeny

Ale Chats

Tymbus

Grainne Mhaol

Andy G

Stabot

Tom Jones

Andy G

Andy G

Sheepception

Marc George Stewart

Steven

Keith Fraser

Wamblecropt

metalthrashingmatt 2814

Happy SpaceInvader

RC 591

Sarah S

allaboutdmagic

TheKamikazenaz

Arishok Qunari

L W

drdarkeny

Matt7895

StopTheMadness

Steven

Richie

SIGNIFYING NOTHING

Tom A

azz06urro

JamesOhGoodie

Sean Organ

drdarkeny

NovaStalker

sunside7

Richard

Mike Gloady

Meinderd de Vries

John 9

wayne henriksen

Kevon

Tactictoe

pete lawd

Grainne Mhaol

Luvie1980

estd1759

Treblaine

Anthony Bradley

Steinar Christensen

LR Buxton

David Simpson

Michael O'Neill

matafuko

Ezra Sky

psionicman

pussycat niffums

Robert Slaughter

Elliot Newton

Elliot Newton

Vivek Iyer

Elliot Newton

Tessmage Tessera

Gary Cheshire

Tal Moore

slimjimpui

Andy G

godlessfather

KruppaF

jaydy71

Appolo Bozec

crypto hodler

Mac Intosh

Team Bombersports

Humble Scribe

Ciaran Irwin

Kermode: Angels & Demons 15 May 09
BBC Radio 5 Live Lyrics