My Never
Blue October Lyrics

Will you think of me in time
Asking if the receiver will remember the singer in the future.

It's never my luck so never mind
The singer has never been lucky, so they don't expect the receiver to remember them.

I want to say your name but
The singer has feelings for the receiver but is hesitant to express them.

The pain starts again
Thinking of the receiver causes emotional pain for the artist.

I had a dream that you with me and
The artist is reminiscing about a dream they had where they were with the receiver.

It wasn't my fault you rolled me over
In the dream, the receiver took control of the situation.

Flipped me over a somersault and that
The actions of the receiver in the dream were unexpected for the singer.

Doesn't happen to me I've never been
The artist is not used to being pursued like that by someone.

Here before I saw forever in my never
The artist experienced something truly special and unique in the dream.

And I stood outside her heaven
Even though the artist had this incredible experience with the receiver in the dream, they are unable to fully be a part of their life.

Will you wait for me in time
Another plea to the receiver to remember the singer in the future.

I lost a lot of what I don't expect to ever return
The artist has lost something significant in their life that they don't believe they'll be able to get back.

I tend to push til the pushing' goes from hurting' to burnt
The singer has a tendency to push people away when they get too close.

I always take them to that place
The singer's behavior always leads to a certain outcome.

I thought they wanted to go
Despite knowing that their behavior causes harm, the singer still believes that others want to be pushed to that point.

Then end up dancing 'around this
Even though the artist knows it's wrong, they still derive satisfaction from their behavior.

Clown commands applause at his show
The artist feels like a clown, performing for others and seeking approval.

I can only dream of you and
The singer is not able to have a real relationship with the receiver, so they can only dream about it.

Sleep that I never see sunlight
The singer is so consumed by thoughts of the receiver that they struggle to sleep and feel like they're constantly in darkness.

Again I can try to be with you but
The artist is aware that their behavior is harmful to the receiver but still yearns for a connection.

Somehow I'll end up just losing a friend and
The artist is afraid that their behavior will result in the loss of another person from their life.

I can only reach for you relate to you
The artist is limited in the ways they can interact with the receiver and can only relate to them on a surface level.

I'm losing my friend where did she go where
The singer is aware that they are pushing the receiver away but is searching for a way to stop it.

Wont you let me into your heaven
A final plea to the receiver to let the artist into their life fully.