12 Days of Christmas
Bob & Doug McKenzie Lyrics


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Okay, good day, this is our Christmas part of the album
And you can play this at your Christmas parties, uh
Or to yourself on Christmas Eve, if there's nothing else to do
Good day, eh? (Yeah)
In case you thought, like, I wasn't on this part
Oh, I guarantee ya, you'd be on

Okay, so, good day, this is the Christmas part
And we're gonna tell you what to get, uh, your true love for Christmas

Look out the window
Where? What are you doing?
Snow, hosehead
Wha? Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing
'Cause it's Christmas time

Hey, hoser
What?
Here's a quiz, quiz for Doug
Okay, I have my thinking toque on
Yeah, right
What are the twelve days of Christmas?
'Cause, figure it out, right Christmas is when? (Um)
Uh, the 25th
Right, and what's the 24th, Christmas Eve, right?
So, that's two and then, what's after that? (That's two)
Um uh, Wrestling Day (Boxing day)
No, get out (Boxing Day, yeah, yeah)
That's three (I knew)
Then what's after that? Nothing
New Year's
Four and what's
New Year's Eve
Five, where do you get twelve? (Okay)
Uh there's two Saturdays and Sundays in there, that's four
That's nine and three other days, which I believe are the mystery days

Okay now
This is our Christmas song
In case you don't know what to get somebody for Christmas
There's lots of ideas in here, so, listen, and don't get stuck
Okay
By the way, that's me on the organ
Aw, Jeez
You start
Okay

On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me, a beer

On the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Two turtlenecks and a beer (okay, good)
On the third day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer (okay)

That should be more there, eh?
Where? On, go

Fourth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer
In a tree, see you need more (oh, yeah)

The fifth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Five golden toques
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, what was it? In a tree

Okay, on the sixth, go
Christmas, my true love gave to me
Six packs of two four
Five golden touques (beauty)
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree

Okay (kay)

On the seventh day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Seven packs of smokes
(Nice gift) oh, six packs of two four
Five golden touques
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree

Right, I keep forgetting
Phew! This should just be the two days of Christmas
It's too hard for us

Um
Go, hoser
Oh

On the eighth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Eight comic books
Seven packs of smokes
Six packs of two four
Five (five golden toques)
(Four pounds of back bacon)
(Three French toast)
(Two turtlenecks)
And a beer on my tree

Yeah, That beer's empty
Okay, day (twelve), uh, twelve
Good day, and welcome to day twelve

Five golden toques
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, in a tree

Beauty, eh?
Where'd you learn to do that?
Uh, albums
Boy, so, like, that's our song, merry Christmas
Merry Christmas
And good day
Good day, everybody
Hap-happy New Year, too

Okay, you know what you left out?
What?
Donuts
I told you to get me donuts (oh no)
Either on the ninth day or the tenth day
Or the eleventh day, I wanted donuts (okay, the song's over)

But I want (merry Christmas, everybody)
Or on the twelfth day, you coulda got me a dozen donuts
So, go out to the stores, and get some presents
You coulda gone down to, like, the good donut shop
Where if you buy a dozen, you get another one free
And then, been thirteen for the thirteen days of Christmas

Well, next Christmas, get me a chainsaw
Take off
Boy, that song was a beauty, it, it moved me




Yeah, I think it ranks up there with Stairway to Heaven
What?

Overall Meaning

Bob & Doug McKenzie's "12 Days of Christmas" is a comedic take on the traditional holiday song, featuring humorous lyrics and a unique Canadian twist. The song starts with Bob and Doug introducing their Christmas album and then discussing the twelve days of Christmas. They proceed to sing about each day, with each successive day's gift building on the previous day's gifts, which include beer, turtlenecks, French toast, back bacon, touques (a Canadian winter hat), and packs of cigarettes. As the song progresses, they struggle to remember the gifts from previous days and eventually give up, suggesting that the song should only be "the two days of Christmas."


The song is a parody of the traditional song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" and was first recorded by the Canadian comedy duo Bob & Doug McKenzie, which consisted of comedians Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas. The song was released in 1981 and was a hit in Canada, reaching No. 3 on the Canadian singles chart. The song has become a holiday classic in Canada and has been covered by other artists, including Canadian singer Alan Frew and American comedian Jeff Foxworthy.


Line by Line Meaning

Okay, good day, this is our Christmas part of the album,
Bob and Doug welcome their listeners to the Christmas segment of their album.


Good day, eh?
Doug greets the listeners in a friendly Canadian manner.


Oh, I guarantee ya, you'd be on.
Bob reassures Doug that he is included in the Christmas segment.


Wha? Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing, cause it's Christmas time. Hey, hoser!
Bob realizes it is snowing outside as they are in Canada during Christmas time and greets Doug using their slang term 'hoser.'


What are the twelve days of Christmas?
Doug is quizzed on the meaning behind the song.


That's three. Then what's after that? Nothing.
Bob corrects Doug's guess of Wrestling Day and reminds him that there is nothing after Boxing Day but New Year's Day.


Okay now. This is our Christmas song, in case you don't know what to get somebody for Christmas.
Bob and Doug introduce their Christmas song and the purpose of its lyrics.


On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a beer.
Bob sings about a beer being a gift on the first day of Christmas, as granted by his true love.


There should be more there, eh?
Doug expresses his opinion that there should be more than just a beer as a gift on the second day of Christmas.


Fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: four pounds of backbacon,
Bob sings about receiving four pounds of backbacon from his true love on the fourth day of Christmas.


Right, I keep forgetting.
Bob admits to forgetting a gift that Doug reminded him about earlier in their song.


Eigth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me:
Bob begins singing about gifts on the eighth day of Christmas from his true love.


Where'd you learn to do that?
Doug asks Bob where he learned a certain skill they were discussing.


Okay, you know what you left out?
Bob brings up something that Doug forgot to include in their song.


So, go out to the stores, and get some presents.
Doug encourages their listeners to get some Christmas shopping done.


Take off!
Doug playfully tells Bob to leave as their Christmas song has ended.


Yeah, I think it ranks up there with Stairway to Heaven...
Doug jokingly compares their Christmas song to a popular rock ballad.




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Written by: Traditional

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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

@tristanchan4949

Since this goes up to eight, I thought of four other ones for this song (followed by their lyrics)
Twelve hockey players
Eleven beaver tails
Ten caribou
Nine ice skates (and then of course)
Eight comic books
Seven packs of smokes
Six packs of two-fours
FIVE GOLDEN TOQUES
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree



All comments from YouTube:

@chris_wizzudz

If they could replace "All I Want for Christmas is You" on the radio with this absolute masterpiece, the Christmas season would be 100x better.

@aclark903

Are you Mariah’s ex or something?

@chris_wizzudz

@@aclark903 Nah, just don’t like her music

@aclark903

@@chris_wizzudz #butterflyMariah

@65coupestang

WHAT THEY NEED TO PUT ON THE RADIO TO MAKE THE CHRISTMAS SEASON 100 TIMES BETTER IS SOME JEFF FOXWORTHY'S TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS

@DoobieFerguson

Funnily enough, I found this song from my local radio station. Shout out DC101

4 More Replies...

@entr3_nou5

Something about the dead silence after β€œand a beer” and how off time everything is has me wheezing

@butfl1der

I'm nursing my baby to sleep and so can't laugh, which, on top of that, makes it ten times funnier! I am having the hardest time not bursting out laughing!

@TheBrannagan

Lovin your screen name!

@davidlafleche1142

Even better: Green Christmas by Stan Freberg

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