In 1950, he scored a huge success with his first recording for Capitol Records, John and Marsha, a soap-opera parody that consisted of the title characters (both played by Freberg) repeating each other's names. In a follow-up he used pedal steel guitarist Speedy West to parody the 1953 country hit A Dear John Letter as A Dear John and Marsha Letter.
Throughout the 1950s he made a name for himself writing and performing both original songs (Tele-Vee-Shun) and parodies of popular tunes (The Yellow Rose of Texas, Day-O, Heartbreak Hotel). With fellow voice actors Daws Butler and June Foray he produced a medieval parody of Dragnet called St. George and the Dragon-Net. The latter recording was a #1 hit for four weeks in late 1953.
Freberg's brilliant, authentic-sounding musical parodies were a byproduct of his collaborations with Billy May and his Capitol Records producer Ken Nelson. His brilliant 1957 spoof of TV "champagne music" master Lawrence Welk, Wun'erful, Wun'erful was a true collaboration with May, a veteran big band musician and jazz arranger (known for his work with Frank Sinatra among others) who loathed Welk's corny style. To replicate that sound, May and some of Hollywood's finest studio musicians and vocalists worked to virtually clone Welk's sound. Billy Liebert, a first-rate accordionist copied Welk's own accordion playing. The humor was lost on Welk; Freberg later recalled the bandleader denying he ever used the term "Wunnerful! Wunnerful!" (later the title of Welk's autobiography).
Another hit song to get the Freberg treatment was the weepy Cry, which Freberg rendered as Try ("You too can be unhappy... if you try!") Ray was furious, until he realized the success of Freberg's parody was helping sales and airplay of his own record; Ray and Freberg actually became close friends.
Freberg continued to skewer the advertising industry after the demise of his radio show, producing Green Chri$tma$ in 1958 (again with Butler), a scathing indictment of the overcommercialization of the holiday. Freberg, the son of a church minister and very religious himself, made sure to point out on that novelty record "Whose birthday we're celebrating." Despite his Jewish-sounding last name, Freberg is actually a Baptist of Swedish heritage.
"Green Chri$tma$" also foreshadowed his musical review on LP Stan Freberg Presents: The United States Of America, Volume 1: The Early Years (1961) in that both combined dialog and song in a musical-like style. Stan Freberg Presents: The United States of America, Volume 2: The Middle Years was planned for a release during America's Bicentennial in 1976 but did not emerge until 1996.
Green Christmas
Stan Freberg Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
CHORUS: Good morning, Mr. Scrooge!
SCROOGE: Well, the meeting will come to order, if you please.
Are all the advertising people represented here?
CHORUS: Everyone except Amalgamated Cheese!
SCROOGE: Well, if they're not here for the Christmas pitch,
I can't help them find new ways of tying their product in to Christmas.
That's why I'm chairman of this board! Let's hear it for me!
CHORUS: Hear, hear!
SCROOGE: All right, Abercrombie, what are your people up to?
ABERCROMBIE: Ahhh, same thing as every year.
Fifty thousand billboards showing Santa Claus pausing to refresh himself with our product.
SCROOGE: Mmmmm, hmmm, well, I think the public has come to expect that and . . .
ABERCROMBIE: That's right. It's become tradition!
SCROOGE: You there, Crass, uhh, I suppose your company's running the usual
magazine ads showing cartons of your cigarettes peeking out of the top of Santa's sack?
CRASS: Better than that! This year we have him smoking one.
SCROOGE: Um-hmmm...
CRASS: Yes. We've got Santa a little more rugged, too.
Both sleeves rolled up and a tattoo on each arm. One of 'em says "Merry Christmas."
SCROOGE: What does the other one say?
CRASS: "Less tar!"
SCROOGE: Great stuff!
CRATCHET: But Mr.Scrooge...
SCROOGE: What? Who are you?
CRATCHET: Bob Cratchet, sir. I've got a little spice company over in East Orange, New Jersey.
Do I have to tie my product in to Christmas?
SCROOGE: What do you mean?
CRATCHET: Well, I was just going to send cards out showing
the three wise men following the Star of Bethlehem...
SCROOGE: I get it! And they're bearing your spices. Now that's perfect.
CRATCHET: No, no... no product in it. I was just going to say, "Peace on Earth... Good Will Toward Men."
MAN: Well, that's a peculiar slogan!
SCROOGE: Old hat, Cratchet! That went out with button shoes! You're a businessman . . .
Christmas is something to take advantage of!
SCROOGE: A red and green bandwagon to jump on!
SCROOGE: A sentimental shot in the arm for sales! Listen!
CHORUS: Deck the halls with advertising,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
While you can be enterprising,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
On the fourth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me
Four bars of soap,
Three cans of peas,
Two breakfast foods,
And some toothpaste on a pear tree!
On the fifth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me. . .
SCROOGE: Five tube-less tires!
CHORUS: Fo-ur quarts of gin,
Three ci-gars,
Two cig-ar-ettes,
And some hair tonic on a pear tree!
Chest-nuts roasting. . .
ANNOUNCER: Sayyyy, Mother, as sure as there's an X in Christmas,
you can be sure those are Tiny Tim Chestnuts roasting.
Tin-y Tim Chestnuts are frill-bodied . . . longer lasting!
This visible shell protects the nut! Now with X-K 29 added,
for people who can't roast after every meal.
GIRL TRIO: Tin-ee Tim! Tin-ee Tim! Chest-nuts all the way!
ANNOUNCER: Tin-y Tim's roast hot... like a chestnut ought! And.. . they are
(ECHO) mild, mild, mild, mild.
CHORUS: Deck the halls with advertising,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
'Tis the time for merchandising,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
Profit never needs a reason,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
Get the money, it's the season,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
SCROOGE: Words to live by, Cratchet!
CRATCHET: For you, maybe.
Can't you just wish someone merry Christmas, for the pure joy of doing it?
SCROOGE: Why? What's the percentage in that?
Let me show you how to make Christmas work for you!
CHORUS: We wish you a merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas,
We wish you a merry Christmas,
And please buy our beer!
SCROOGE: There you go, Cratchet! That's Christmas with a purpose.
CRATCHET: I know, but wait a minute.
Don't you guys make enough profit the other eleven months?
Christmas comes but once a year.
SCROOGE: Humph! Funny thing you should bring that up.
That's exactly the point I was about to make. Hit it, boys!
SCROOGE: Christmas comes but once a year,
So you better make hay while the snow is falling,
That's opportunity calling you!
CHORUS: Rub your hands, December's here,
What a wonderful time to be Glad and merry!
SCROOGE: Just so you're mercenary too!
CHORUS: Buy an ad and show all the toys,
Show all the toys up on the shelf
SCROOGE: Just make sure that you get a plug,
You get a plug, In for yourself!
SCROOGE AND CHORUS:
Christmas comes but once a year,
So you better cash in,
While the spirit lingers,
It's slipping through your fingers,
Boy! Don't you realize
Christmas can be such a
Monetary joy!
CRATCHET: Well, I guess you fellows will never change.
SCROOGE: Why should we? Christmas has two s's in it, and they're both dollar signs.
CRATCHET: Yeah, but they weren't there to begin with.
SCROOGE: Eh?
CRATCHET: The people keep hoping you'll remember. But you never do.
SCROOGE: Remember what?
CRATCHET: Whose birthday we're celebrating.
SCROOGE: Well, ....... don't get me wrong.
The story of Christmas, in its simplicity, is a good thing - I'll buy that.
It's just that we know a good thing when we see it.
CRATCHET: But don't you realize Christmas has a significance, a meaning.
SCROOGE: A sales curve! Wake up, Cratchet, it's later than you think.
CRATCHET: I know, Mr. Scrooge, I know.
CHORUS: On the first day of Christmas,
The advertising's there, with
Newspaper ads,
Billboards too,
Business Christmas cards,
And commercials on a pear tree. . .
Jingles here, jingles there,
Jingles all the way.
Dashing through the snow,
In a fifty-foot coup-e
O'er the fields we go,
Selling all the way. . .
Deck the halls with advertising,
What's the use of compromising,
Fa la la la la la la la la.
The song "Green Christmas" by Stan Freberg satirizes the commercialization of Christmas by highlighting the role of advertising agencies in promoting products around the holiday, ending with the message that Christmas has become a "monetary joy." In the song, Scrooge, the chairman of the advertising board, complains that the company Amalgamated Cheese is not present and emphasizes the need for advertising agencies to find ways of tying their products into Christmas. Abercrombie boasts that their company plans to show Santa Claus on 50,000 billboards, pausing to refresh himself with their product. Crass shares that his company plans on showing Santa Claus smoking one of their cigarettes with rugged image and tattoos to appeal to a younger market.
Bob Cratchet represents the only individual with a small company willing to highlight Christmas without including any product placement, instead sending out cards saying "Peace on Earth... Good Will Toward Men." Cratchet questions the company's greed that overruns the purpose of the season, but Scrooge disavows the religious significance of Christmas, only focusing on the sales curve. The song ends with a chorus singing Christmas carols that have been transformed into jingles to sell products.
Overall, the song reveals the commercial aspects of Christmas and the indifference of companies to the true religious and emotional significance of the holiday. It criticizes corporations for taking advantage of the sentimentality of the holiday to sell products and turning it into another business opportunity.
Line by Line Meaning
SCROOGE: Bah, humbug, everybody.
Scrooge is already in a bad mood and disapproves of something about Christmas.
CHORUS: Good morning, Mr. Scrooge!
The people are greeting Scrooge politely, but he does not reciprocate.
SCROOGE: Well, the meeting will come to order, if you please.
Are all the advertising people represented here?
Scrooge is starting a business meeting and wants to ensure all participants are present, specifically the advertising people.
CHORUS: Everyone except Amalgamated Cheese!
All the advertising people participants are present, except for Amalgamated Cheese.
SCROOGE: That's why I'm chairman of this board! Let's hear it for me!
CHORUS: Hear, hear!
Scrooge takes pride in chairing the board meeting and basking in the limelight.
All right, Abercrombie, what are your people up to?
Scrooge wants to hear about Abercrombie's advertising strategy.
ABERCROMBIE: Ahhh, same thing as every year.
Fifty thousand billboards showing Santa Claus pausing to refresh himself with our product.
Abercrombie's advertising strategy revolves around using Santa Claus drinking the product on billboards, which hasn't changed over the years.
CRASS: Better than that! This year we have him smoking one.
SCROOGE: Um-hmmm...
CRASS: Yes. We've got Santa a little more rugged, too.Both sleeves rolled up and a tattoo on each arm. One of 'em says "Merry Christmas."
SCROOGE: What does the other one say?
CRASS: "Less tar!"
SCROOGE: Great stuff!
Crass is excited about their new advertising strategy where Santa smokes their product and has tattoos which Scrooge approves of.
CRATCHET: Bob Cratchet, sir. I've got a little spice company over in East Orange, New Jersey.
Do I have to tie my product in to Christmas?
Bob Cratchet presents his spice company and questions whether they have to include their product in their Christmas advertising.
SCROOGE: I get it! And they're bearing your spices. Now that's perfect.
Scrooge misunderstands Cratchet's comment and assumes they were planning on advertising their spices with the three wise men, which he thinks is perfect.
CRATCHET: No, no... no product in it. I was just going to say, "Peace on Earth... Good Will Toward Men."
Cratchet's advertising strategy is to simply send out Christmas cards with a positive message.
SCROOGE: Old hat, Cratchet! That went out with button shoes! You're a businessman . . .
Christmas is something to take advantage of!
Scrooge thinks that Cratchet's Christmas advertising strategy is outdated and that Christmas should be leveraged for business purposes.
SCROOGE: A red and green bandwagon to jump on!
SCROOGE: A sentimental shot in the arm for sales! Listen!
Scrooge considers Christmas as an opportunity to drive business and profits.
CHORUS: Deck the halls with advertising, Fa la la la la la la la la.
While you can be enterprising,On the fourth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me,Four bars of soap,Three cans of peas,
Two breakfast foods,And some toothpaste on a pear tree!
The chorus promotes a holiday where people can be enterprising and encourages people to buy products as gifts.
SCROOGE: Five tube-less tires!
Scrooge's response to the fifth day of Christmas in the chorus is to provide a gift that he can advertise- five tubeless tires.
ANNOUNCER: Sayyyy, Mother, as sure as there's an X in Christmas,
you can be sure those are Tiny Tim Chestnuts roasting.
The announcer promotes Tiny Tim Chestnuts, highlighting their rich taste and X-K 29 protection, which allows them to last longer.
CRATCHET: Don't you guys make enough profit the other eleven months?
Christmas comes but once a year.
Cratchet questions why companies need to go all-out with Christmas advertising for one month, suggesting that they already earn enough profits during the rest of the year.
SCROOGE: That's exactly the point I was about to make. Hit it, boys!
SCROOGE: Christmas comes but once a year,
So you better make hay while the snow is falling,
That's opportunity calling you!
Scrooge agrees with Cratchet and promptly switches to advocating for Christmas advertising opportunities while it lasts.
CRATCHET: Can't you just wish someone merry Christmas, for the pure joy of doing it?
SCROOGE: Why? What's the percentage in that?
Cratchet suggests that people should say "Merry Christmas" without focusing on the profits, while Scrooge sarcastically questions the benefit of such an act.
CHORUS: On the first day of Christmas,
The advertising's there, with
Newspaper ads,
Billboards too,
Business Christmas cards,
And commercials on a pear tree. . .
The chorus recaps the various ways advertising companies market their products during Christmas.
SCROOGE: Christmas has two s's in it, and they're both dollar signs.
Scrooge sees Christmas as a way to make profits and a great business opportunity where "ss" sound like dollar signs.
CRATCHET: The people keep hoping you'll remember. But you never do.
SCROOGE: Remember what?
CRATCHET: Whose birthday we're celebrating.
Cratchet reminds Scrooge of the true meaning of Christmas, which he seems to have forgotten.
SCROOGE: Well, ....... don't get me wrong.
The story of Christmas, in its simplicity, is a good thing - I'll buy that.
It's just that we know a good thing when we see it.
Scrooge acknowledges the value of the Christmas story, but still focuses on the business opportunity it offers.
CRATCHET: But don't you realize Christmas has a significance, a meaning.
SCROOGE: A sales curve! Wake up, Cratchet, it's later than you think.
Cratchet believes Christmas has a deeper meaning, yet Scrooge only sees it as a financial opportunity.
CRATCHET: I know, Mr. Scrooge, I know.
Cratchet understands that Scrooge will never change his mind about the importance of Christmas.
Contributed by Charlie C. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
Ben Bryant
It's tragic that this brilliant comedian and social commentator has been virtually forgotten. Viva Freeberg!
kunekune
A comic genius!
MrUnidyne
He created many TV spots that have become classics, such as a literal big budget song and dance number for Great American Soups (with none other but Ann Miller!), and a parody of a Lark cigarettes commercial for Jeno's pizza rolls.
Al the Alligator
You misspelled his name
Al Williams
Beside being a composit genius, Stan Freeberg was doing the impossible task of heading off a blindly stampeding public who have become like a herd of cattle who've been feeding in a loco weed patch.
Sit DamnYou
Not everyone forgot him.
Diana Lee
What a trip down Memory Lane! This wonderful work was popular when I was in high school 60 years ago. What a brilliant talent was Stan Freberg!
Lonnie Bishop
Stan Freberg was truly the master of satire, and this record proves it!
louswire
ONE of my favorite Stan Freburg bits, including "I'm Getting Nothing For Christmas", "Christmas Dragnet", and so many more.
Abigail Wignarajah
We listened to this every Christmas on my dads record player. A classic. I’ve searched everywhere for it and finally, here it is!