Hurt Myself
Dark Lotus Lyrics

Pain is sexual
The pain that is inflicted upon oneself is stimulating in a sexual way

And I'm horny
The pain that is being inflicted upon oneself sexually arouses them

I jump in the mosh pit, but I'm alone
The singer is participating in an activity which is meant to be enjoyed with a group of people, but they are alone

Between four trees, I get it on
The artist is engaging in self-harm between four trees

My brain is hemorrhaging, it's them or me
The artist is experiencing severe pain in their brain, and feels like they have to choose between themself and the cause of the pain

It ain't easy knocking over a tree (I pass out)
The singer is attempting self-harm by knocking over a tree, but passes out in the process

I wake up the room is padded
The singer wakes up in a padded room, likely due to their previous self-harming behavior

But hold up
The artist pauses their story

Close rip, wrap them around my neck
The artist tightens ropes around their neck

And choke myself to death, no breath
The artist is attempting to kill themself by asphyxiation

Now I'm out, I'm strapped down
The singer is unconscious and strapped down

Wait, I can still move my head around
The artist realizes they are not dead and can still move their head slightly

But I got about four inches between the back of my head And the metal gurney bed
The singer's head is only a few inches away from hitting the metal bed they are strapped to

BOOM!
The singer suddenly experiences something

Slamming it, retraction BOOM
The singer is experiencing painful sensations in their head

I feel the back of my skull is cracking
The artist feels like their skull is breaking

A broken bone is piercing my brain
The artist feels like their broken bone is piercing their brain

And BOOM, I just hammered it in...
The singer hammers something into their brain, likely resulting in death

Ahhhhh Ahh I hurt myself God I hurt myself Stop me Pain, pain pain I hurt myself Stop me
The singer is in pain and experiencing self-harm, calling for someone to stop them

I'm sitting in the dark, talking to myself
The artist is alone and talking to themself

Why does everybody tell me that I need help?
The artist is questioning why others believe they need help

I'm in love with pain
The artist enjoys experiencing pain

I take a needle or a knife And drive that mother fucker through my windpipe
The singer inflicts self-harm by stabbing themself in the throat

Just might Take a razor blade Dip it in some gas See if I can take a little skin off the calf
The artist considers inflicting self-harm with burning and cutting their skin

Grotesque I'm a walking body bag And when it all heals, I pick the scabs
The singer's body carries evidence of their self-harming behavior, and they pick at the wounds after they heal

Alone in the casket, buried in the earth Self-inflicted wounds, blood stains on my t-shirt
The singer envisions their own death, with self-inflicted wounds and blood on their shirt

Kick out the door till my legs fall off Try to use my head, but my skull too soft
The singer attempts to break down a door and continue to hurt themself, but their head is too injured

The pain overwhelms shooting through my kidneys Blood rushes out when I stick a shank in me Keep stabbing and sticking And pulling all the blood spitting I cut off oxygen Take my own life again
The artist is experiencing extreme pain, and continues to self-harm to the point of taking their own life

Cut and slice away with a steak knife Hit myself in the ankle with PVC pipe Exacto blade underneath the fingernail Bleed and make another cut, fuck it might as well Tablespoon of Morton's salt in the open wound If it don't burn, you don't know what you doing If you fail, just return to start Self defecation is a beautiful art
The artist describes various methods of self-harm, showing a willingness to continue despite the pain

STOP ME!
The singer is urging someone to stop them from continuing to harm themself

Is it sexual?
The singer questions whether their self-harming behavior is related to sexual desire

Haha
A laugh, possibly indicating that the artist finds humor in their own self-harming behavior