Hell Of A Year
Francis Sage Lyrics

It's been a hell of a year, but I'm mentally prepared
Reflecting on a challenging year and acknowledging the mental fortitude to handle any future obstacles.

To do a dance around the next couple medical scares
Facing medical uncertainties with grace and navigating through them like Fred Astaire on worn-out tap shoes.

I'm Fred Astaire with the metal wearing quickly off my tap shoes
The singer is confident in his ability to dance around life's problems despite feeling worn down.

So I step quietly, the way that cat's move
Moving quietly like a cat, implying a sense of caution.

But I'm bear-like. My head trapped in dear lights
Describing feeling trapped and unable to break free from the fixation on certain issues, like a deer in headlights.

You can call me John, I'm writing letters to the dark side of the moon tonight
Referencing a well-known song, the singer is acknowledging his loneliness and isolation by writing letters to an unreachable place.

My lovely Jane, you went away but the pain stayed
Addressing a loss and the lingering pain that comes with it.

So I'm sending you a package to the address where you traded names
Sending a symbolic gesture of closure and healing to an unknown location.

I made no claims on the identity theft
Denying any responsibility for loss or damage.

I'm more concerned about the home with no amenities left
Prioritizing physical comforts over abstract losses.

And it's already a mess. The dust piles like your junk mail
Describing a disarrayed environment, possibly representing the chaos in the singer's life.

So I eat away depression and crush the scale
Using food as a coping mechanism and crushing the scale to avoid confronting personal struggles.

You find yourself on the opposite side of the spectrum
Contrasting the singer's coping mechanism with someone else's.

Emaciated on a strict diet of bed crumbs
Implying a lack of energy or motivation in someone's life.

Me? I choose to wallow and I'll just swim in my fat
Accepting and embracing one's own coping mechanism.

You...refuse to swallow so I see ribs from the back
Judging someone else's coping mechanism and the physical effects it has on them.

This isn't an attack, it's an admission of guilt
Expressing remorse and recognizing one's own faults.

I'm living in the past, kissing your ass, sipping your milk
Acknowledging a sense of regression by focusing on the past and yearning for someone who is no longer there.

But it's all bone and curdle. I saw stones in a circle
Metaphorically describing the deterioration of a relationship.

Stood in the middle. Told myself riddles in a robe that's purple
Perhaps referencing a moment of self-reflection, trying to decipher complex issues.

The murder weapon was an icicle
Describing a metaphorical killing blow, possibly symbolic of betrayal or heartbreak.

Is that the reason why I'm standing in this puddle with my eyes so full?
Wondering if the pain of loss has something to do with the current state of mind.

I fight feelings like a war on drugs
Drawing a comparison between the internal conflict and the war on drugs.

I'm a chemist with a test tube addiction born through coffee mugs
Using coffee as a metaphorical component of the coping mechanism.

Our baby now is all growed up
Describing the passage of time and change.

Your car is still dead in my driveway while I wait for the tow truck
Reflecting on unresolved issues and waiting for external help.

And you know what? I know I drove you away
Taking responsibility for the loss of a relationship.

I still don't think it was wrong so I don't know what to say
Feeling conflicted about one's actions and the consequences that followed.

You say that life ain't fair, well guess what, baby...life ain't. Thems the breaks
Acknowledging life's hardships, and that sometimes things just happen.

You say that life ain't worth it. But it is. You gotta work it. Nobody's life is perfect
Encouraging resilience and the effort to improve one's life, despite the challenges.

Yeah, you've been dealt a bad hand. Placed against a stacked deck
Acknowledging when someone has obstacles that are difficult to overcome.

Been through all the cat scans and bad checks
Physical and financial challenges are commonplace.

But I slashed your debt. Not your wrists
Taking responsibility for helping others in a meaningful way.

And I couldn't help with anything else that became cancerous
Acknowledging the limitations of one's ability to help others.

Halfway people with a full baby to bury
A metaphor for something being half-empty but filled with something that weighs heavy.

Took a flame to the papier-mâché sanctuary
Describing the destruction of something that was once sacred, possibly symbolizing the loss of innocence.

When the smoke clears...try not to stare into the light
Encouraging a sense of caution when looking ahead.

But, also, don't stay in the dark as if that's what life is like
Encouraging one to find balance and hope amidst darkness.

It's just a series of unfortunate events
A common phrase used to describe life's challenges.

But the messages we get are more important than death
Implying that the lessons learned from hardship are more valuable than life itself.

What's the rush? I've got a shortness of breath
Feeling anxious or pressured to live life a certain way.

What's the rush? Running from you...running from me
Reflecting on one's own life choices and how they affect relationships.

It's the rush. The crush. The lust. The love-trust
Alluding to various emotions and their interconnectedness.

So what's the trouble? The busted bubble? The unjust?
Expressing confusion and asking important questions.

That's just the way the cookie crumbles. It does suck
Accepting life's difficulties and acknowledging that they are not always fair.

But suck it up. We're all looking, but nothing's enough
Encouraging one to be resilient and persistent despite external limitations.

We used each other as a crutch. The clutch. The shift switches
Reflecting on a relationship where both parties relied on each other for support and comfort.

You couldn't just adjust. You combusted and ripped pictures
Acknowledging that not everyone copes with struggle in a healthy or productive way.

This is why I'm not considered a saint? Well, guess what?......I ain't
Addressing the moral expectations placed on individuals and acknowledging that he cannot live up to them.

It's been a hell of a year
Reiterating the challenges faced throughout a difficult year.

You said that I ain't there, I ain't care, and life ain't fair
Recalling the criticism received from others during this difficult time.

It's been a hell of a trip
Acknowledging the journey and the ups and downs it has brought.

You say my mind's unfit, I've been flip, and I ain't shit
Repeating negative feedback received from others.

It's been a hell of a life
Reflecting on the past and perhaps feeling a sense of dread about the future.

You say that I ain't like the way I write and that ain't right
Receiving criticism for one's creative output.

It's been a hell of an attempt
Perhaps feeling like the artist has tried and fell short.

You say that I ain't meant for promises unkept
Feeling like others doubt the ability to follow through on promises.

Well, guess what, darlin'..I'm a keep keep callin'
Despite feeling overwhelmed, the artist will continue to push forward and try to make things work.