I Tried to Die Young
Melanie Lyrics


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I tried to die young
Really I tried
But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
I laugh at the things I've done
When I tried to die young

I took a plane through the dawn
Threw myself on the tracks
But the train didn't come and I had to walk back
I jumped into the whirlpool thought I get sucked in
I just kept spinning around 'til I learned how to swim

I tried to die young
Boy, did I tried
But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
And I laugh at the things that I've done
When I tried to die young

My heart kept on breaking
And the crack sought the edge
Where the hand of a shadow grabbed the hand in my head
There where demons, I know them
And they still come by
But we've become friends, my demons and I

I tried to die young
Really I tried
But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
And I laugh at the things that I've done
When I tried to die young

I took a razor to the wrist of reality
Hell bent on my way toward futility
I got a reason to believe that it won't go on forever
But reason to the heart is a message undelivered

I tried to die young
Really, really I tried
But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
And I laugh at the things I've done
When I tried to die young

Now I'm the old girl I never thought I'd become
Does it get any better asks the little girl in my song
I'm still learning the answers so I make up things, you see
She laughs, you're still the same and you never kill me

I tried to die young
Really I tried
But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
And I laugh at the things I've done
When I tried to die young

Oh, I laugh at the things I've done
Oh, I laugh at the things I've done
I laugh at the things I've done
When I tried to die young





I tried to die young

Overall Meaning

In "I Tried to Die Young," Melanie reflects on her past attempts to end her life at a young age. She admits to trying multiple methods, such as taking a plane through the dawn, throwing herself on the tracks, and jumping into a whirlpool. However, despite her efforts, she couldn't bring herself to succumb to death because of a voice deep inside of her. She describes her heart as constantly breaking and seeking the edge, where the hand of a shadow grabs the hand in her head. The demons that haunted her became her friends, and she learned to live with them.


In the latter part of the song, Melanie takes a razor to the wrist of reality and spirals towards futility. But she finds a reason to believe that it won't go on forever, even though the reason to the heart is a message undelivered. As she becomes older, she realizes that things don't necessarily get better, and she's still learning the answers. But the little girl in her song reminds her that she's still the same, and that she never killed her.


Line by Line Meaning

I tried to die young
Melanie tried to end her life early


Really I tried
Melanie put in a lot of effort to try and die young


But the voice deep inside would not let me succumb
Melanie had a strong inner voice that prevented her from taking her own life


I laugh at the things I've done
Melanie finds it amusing and ridiculous that she tried to end her life


I took a plane through the dawn
Melanie took a plane ride at dawn, possibly hoping it would crash


Threw myself on the tracks
Melanie attempted to kill herself by jumping in front of a train


But the train didn't come and I had to walk back
The train never arrived, so Melanie was forced to walk back home


I jumped into the whirlpool thought I get sucked in
Melanie jumped into a whirlpool, thinking she would drown and die


I just kept spinning around 'til I learned how to swim
Melanie eventually learned how to swim and survived the whirlpool


My heart kept on breaking
Melanie's heart was constantly hurting and in pain


And the crack sought the edge
Her emotional pain was pushing her towards self-harm


Where the hand of a shadow grabbed the hand in my head
Her depression was taking over and controlling her thoughts


There where demons, I know them
Melanie is aware of her inner demons that cause her pain


And they still come by
Her demons still affect her to this day


But we've become friends, my demons and I
Melanie has learned to live with her demons and accepts them as part of her life


I took a razor to the wrist of reality
Melanie harmed herself by cutting her wrist, trying to escape reality


Hell bent on my way toward futility
She was determined to reach a hopeless and meaningless end


I got a reason to believe that it won't go on forever
Melanie found hope and a reason to believe things will get better


But reason to the heart is a message undelivered
Although she knows things will get better, she still struggles to believe it in her heart


Now I'm the old girl I never thought I'd become
Melanie has survived and grown older, something she never thought would happen when she tried to die young


Does it get any better asks the little girl in my song
The inner child in Melanie wonders if life gets any easier or happier


I'm still learning the answers so I make up things, you see
Melanie is still figuring life out and sometimes makes things up to cope with her struggles


She laughs, you're still the same and you never kill me
The inner child finds humor in the fact that despite Melanie's attempts to end her life, she is still alive


Oh, I laugh at the things I've done
Melanie finds humor in her attempts to end her life




Contributed by Ella P. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

Patrick Colucci

DEAD MAN's CURVE - Eiler Lane and Taxter Road East Irivngton NY. Recntly I drove back to my home town from Philadelphia and past a spot on Taxter Road where I had left some blood and tears so many years ago.

It was late at night one June night in 1970 a week before my wedding. I had way to much to drink. I was sitting in Neil's Bar in North Tarrytown with my good buddy Larry . We flipped a coin. He won the car I got the bike.

We decided to race through all the red lights in Tarrytown New York on our way back to to that winding strip of roadway in East Irvington called Taxter Road. By time I made it to Sunnyside lane I was way ahead so I slid up to cement steps of the East Irvington corner store where I waited, revving my throttle until I heard the roar of Larry's engine.

Just then I pointed my machine toward the roadway. With an extra twist of the throttle amid sparks and flying gravel the bike straightened out, and I continued snake-like up Taxter Road.

I was fast approaching the first curve at the schoolyard with the telephone pole on the corner which jutted toward the road. I headed straight for the telephone pole and didn't ease up on the gas. I laughed madly as I rapidly approached the pole, as I had done on prior occaisions playing a deadly game of tag.

All of a sudden sparks flew as my handlebar struck nail heads buried in the pole. The force of contact hurled the bike toward the opposite lane as I instinctively regained control and continued to fly up the twisted roadway at incredible speed, even though blood trickled down my right arm from several splinters, which had lodged in my shoulder.

I was going flat out when I reached the tight corner at Eiler Lane. That's when I lost control as the back tire hit the gravel. I did my best along the bumpy shoulder as the bike flipped and I landed on top of it, my two hands outstretched still holding the handlebars as my twisted legs dragged behind.

The eerie sound of metal sliding quickly over pavement filled the night as sparks lit up the road. The pavement was hot and unforgiving as it burnt and scraped the parts of my body, which spilled over the machine as it slid with incredible force.

For a few seconds my fate was uncertain. Then with sudden impact I struck the pole, crumbling the machine and causing my face to spew hot blood, as I and the bike were finally separated and flung in opposite directions.

I could hear the screeching of Larry's car as it stopped some distance behind me. I didn't know how badly I was hurt until I tried to raise my twisted body from the roadway. As I sat up blood spewed from my face. As I raised my hand my finger passed right through the gash in my nose. I began to see flashes of white light, It was like an opera as I vacillated between the horror of my condition and the peaceful defense that only the state of shock could offer.

There was a loud sound of rushing wind in my ears as I felt myself being drawn toward the light and feelings of immortality. There was no pain, only tremendous energy.

And then there was the voice. The desperate voice of Larry calling out to me, imploring me to "hold on!.....

Larry picked me up from the pavement and drove me toward Phelp's Memorial hospital. I had lost so much blood that when we arrived I looked up at the lights of the emergengency room and asked why he had taken me there? It wasn't until I looked down at my blood soaked shirt that I rememebered the tragic incident earlier on that hot summer night.

I often wondered why the Lord din't take me that night. I now realize that there is so much work yet left undone...

Lord have mercy on me a sinner.

Patc



All comments from YouTube:

Melanie - Official Page of Melanie Safka

But I always wanted to be a woman with a past~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZIXLDZn5V8

Melanie Mergen

Hi Melanie! Lovely name... ;) I just love your songs. So full of wonder, honesty, pain, joy... songs like this are rarer than they should be! Thx for inspiring the folk songs I write πŸ’œ

Bruce Levitan

Melanie has always been the purveyor of great music that actually means something.

TheHappyHeart

Your son Beau inherited your talent. How beautiful, that such talent will go on through the ages.

nia 34

Ohhh, Melanie you are a beautiful soul!! I've listened to your songs since "baby day"!! And tonight I heard your chorus in Ren Gill's "patience"πŸ€— So glad you are both here + I'm alive to listen!!!

Beatles❀Girl

So cool to have your son play & sing along with you!!

3636lk

Love you so much Melanie, you made music so much more interesting and meaningful. You were one of the biggest highlights in my life. XXOO

Sir John Anthony Miller, EACA

Like no other, you touched me with this one. Really. I am now also the β€œold” man I thought I’d never become. You are awesome - as ever. Timeless. Maybe β€œold” is just a state of mind. Maybe. ❀️

Melanie - Official Page of Melanie Safka

+Sir John Anthony Miller, EACA... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZIXLDZn5V8

Tm 96

I marvel at the strength and will power of this beautiful young lady. I am certainly glad you are still with us. The strength you give people
is keeping many of us alive. Thank you

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