Hail The Chap
Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer Lyrics


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One and a-two!

At the approach of the millennial malaise
There were blights with a need of a perennial braze
The age of the Corinthian, the plunderer and the dandy
Had given way to that of the prig and the bore
Just before boredom became a modus operandi
Some said stop the rot, I shall take no more
Society's floundering in squalid desperation
And what's wanted to save it was a savvy publication
Now, I've often wondered how best to dress for wrestling
Or between ties and cravats, which was the best thing?
Were there really seventy-three ways to doff one's hat?
There were! I'd rather suspected that
At last we were decanted knowledge sweet as sherry
The Chap was here, we were all so very
Glad of it. You can stay in standard evolution
Or come and join us in our dandy revolution

Give your pipe a tap
Park your rap or trap
Raise your hat or cap
As we say, all hail The Chap
All hail The Chap

Now we all know rules are there to be broken
But never have truer words been spoken
And in the code hereafter, hey presto,
Hear the ten rules of The Chap manifesto

Thou shalt always wear tweed
Is the only fabric you shall ever need
Thou shalt never not smoke
Pipes made from briar, booze aged in oak
Always be courteous to the ladies
Give an air of Zeus with a dash of Hades
Never ever wear PANTALOONS DE NIMES
Come on young scam there's still time to switch teams
Thou shalt always doff one's hat
If you're flanneur or simply like to stop and chat
Never fasten the lower button of one's WESKIT
Look, we don't make the rules it's just the best kit
Thou shalt always speak properly
Don't give the Westwoods a monopoly
Never wear plimsolls if not doing sport
Unless you're a chap-hop superstar sort
Always worship the trouser press
Good Mr. Corby, he knows best
Always cultivate interesting facial hair
But on the top, here, not under there

It's a call to charms, a design for living
Within a world so unforgiving
Where sloth and banality are the standard brew
Well, we've upped our standards
So up yours too!

Give your pipe a tap
Park your rap or trap
Raise your hat or cap
As we say, all hail The Chap
All hail The Chap
All hail The Chap
(One and a-two!)
All hail The Chap




(Once again for luck)
All hail The Chap

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer's "Hail The Chap" are a tribute to the lifestyle and philosophy of the "Chap" movement, which promotes elegance, wit, and refinement in an age of mass-produced banality. The song describes the decline of society into boredom and squalor, and the need for a savvy publication to save it. The singer then lists the ten rules of the "Chap" manifesto, which include wearing tweed, smoking pipes, being courteous to ladies, not wearing denim pants, always doffing one's hat, and cultivating interesting facial hair. The song is a call to charms and a design for living that challenges the standards of a world that is slothful and banal.


The first verse of the song sets the scene by describing the social and cultural conditions that led to the emergence of the "Chap" movement. The second verse introduces the ten rules of the "Chap" manifesto, which prescribe a code of conduct and a way of life that celebrates style, manners, and individualism. The refrain "give your pipe a tap, park your rap or trap, raise your hat or cap, as we say, all hail The Chap" is a call to action that invites the audience to embrace the values of the movement.


Line by Line Meaning

At the approach of the millennial malaise
As the new century approached, there was a growing sense of boredom and malaise among people


There were blights with a need of a perennial braze
People were looking for a cure to their boredom and dullness


The age of the Corinthian, the plunderer and the dandy
The era of wealthy, fashionable people who lived for pleasure and luxury


Had given way to that of the prig and the bore
But now, these people were replaced by those who were self-righteous and dull


Just before boredom became a modus operandi
Before boredom became a normal way of life for everyone


Some said stop the rot, I shall take no more
Some people wanted to put an end to this boring lifestyle


Society's floundering in squalid desperation
The society was struggling and in a state of hopeless despair


And what's wanted to save it was a savvy publication
What was needed to save society was a smart and knowledgeable publication


Now, I've often wondered how best to dress for wrestling
I have wondered about the ideal dress for wrestling matches


Or between ties and cravats, which was the best thing?
I have also wondered about whether ties or cravats are better


Were there really seventy-three ways to doff one's hat?
I had always suspected there were many ways to remove one's hat, and confirmed there are seventy-three


There were! I'd rather suspected that
And my suspicions were indeed true!


At last we were decanted knowledge sweet as sherry
We were finally given the knowledge that was as sweet and precious as a sherry


The Chap was here, we were all so very glad of it
The magazine called 'The Chap' was here, and everyone was very happy about it


You can stay in standard evolution or come and join us in our dandy revolution
You have a choice: continue living a plain life or join us in our fashionable and stylish revolution


Give your pipe a tap
Tap your pipe to get rid of any ash or debris


Park your rap or trap
Stop talking or shut up for a moment


Raise your hat or cap
Tip your hat or cap as a sign of respect and greeting


As we say, all hail The Chap
We encourage you to support and praise 'The Chap' magazine


Now we all know rules are there to be broken
We understand that rules are meant to be broken sometimes


But never have truer words been spoken
However, these rules are an exception because they are tried and tested


And in the code hereafter, hey presto,
And now, I will reveal the code of conduct


Hear the ten rules of The Chap manifesto
These are the ten rules that 'The Chap' magazine lives by


Thou shalt always wear tweed
Always wear clothing items made of tweed


Is the only fabric you shall ever need
It's the only fabric that truly matters!


Thou shalt never not smoke
You should always smoke, preferably pipes made of briar and drink aged whiskey


Always be courteous to the ladies
Always show respect and courtesy to women


Give an air of Zeus with a dash of Hades
Should have a godlike and authoritative presence, but temper it with a hint of danger


Never ever wear PANTALOONS DE NIMES
Never wear denim jeans


Come on young scam there's still time to switch teams
It's not too late for you to switch to smarter clothing options


Thou shalt always doff one's hat
Always respect others by removing and tipping one's hat


If you're flanneur or simply like to stop and chat
Whether you're a stroller who likes to talk to passers-by or just a friendly conversationalist


Never fasten the lower button of one's WESKIT
Always leave the last button of one's waistcoat or jacket unfastened


Look, we don't make the rules it's just the best kit
We didn't invent the rules, but we know they're the best


Thou shalt always speak properly
Always speak in a refined and educated manner


Don't give the Westwoods a monopoly
Don't give Vivienne Westwood the authority to dictate fashion trends!


Never wear plimsolls if not doing sport
Never wear sneakers or athletic shoes with casual clothing outside of an athletic activity


Unless you're a chap-hop superstar sort
Unless you're a rapper who specializes in 'chap-hop' music!


Always worship the trouser press
Always use a trouser press to ensure your trousers are wrinkle-free


Good Mr. Corby, he knows best
Mr. Corby, who invented the trouser press, is the best guide for us


Always cultivate interesting facial hair
Always grow elegant and distinguished facial hair


But on the top, here, not under there
But only on the top part of the face, not the bottom!


It's a call to charms, a design for living
This manifesto is more than just a list of rules, it's a way of living with grace and charm


Within a world so unforgiving
In a world that often lacks refinement and grace


Where sloth and banality are the standard brew
Where laziness and dullness prevail


Well, we've upped our standards
But not us, we've decided to lift our standards


So up yours too!
And we encourage you to do the same!


All hail The Chap
Praise and respect to 'The Chap' magazine


(One and a-two!)
It's time for celebration!


(Once again for luck)
Let's do it one more time for good luck!




Contributed by Savannah P. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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