When Did I Become Such A Bitch?
Nerina Pallot Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

In Sears and Roebuck in 1957
In my last life, all good girls would go to heaven
But I've a strangeness, a queer propensity
For twisting the knife too easily

When I think I'm getting better
I'm just getting worse
When I think I've got it made
I am impossibly cursed

When did I become such a bitch?
And how did I let this happen?
I don't know
When did I become such a bitch?
I used to be so nice

It's like a sickness
I'm powerless to stop it
My boring life, my little heart made misanthropic
Don't give me reasons, just give me therapy
But really, just give me what I want

When I think I'm getting better
I'm evil again
When I think I've got it fixed
I have familiar refrains

When did I become such a bitch?
And how did I let this happen?
I don't know
When did I become such a bitch?
I used to be so nice
Well I used to be alright

But I hate everyone and everything all of the time
And being so cruel
'Cause all the pleasure that I get
My wicked tongue helps me forget
Myself and all my foolish ways
'Cause being good is just so fucking boring
La la la it's boring

When I think I'm getting better
I'm just getting worse
When I think I've got it made
I am impossibly cursed
When I think that I'm better
I'm worse, yes I am
When I think that I'm better
I find that I'm cursed

When did I become such a bitch?
And how did I let this happen?
I don't know
When did I become such a bitch?
I used to be so nice once upon a time

When did I become such a bitch?
And how did I let this happen?
I don't know
When did I become such a bitch?




I used to be so nice
Well I used to be alright

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of "When Did I Become Such A Bitch?" by Nerina Pallot are a personal and introspective reflection on the singer's own personality and how it has changed over time. The song starts with a nostalgic reference to a bygone era, where being a "good girl" was expected and rewarded. However, the singer acknowledges that she is, in fact, quite different from that ideal. She has a "queer propensity" for hurting others, and she seems almost addicted to the power she feels when she twists the knife.


As the song progresses, the singer becomes increasingly aware of her own dysfunctionality, but also more resigned to it. She feels like an addict who is "powerless to stop" her own self-destructive behavior. At the same time, she seems to revel in her own wickedness, finding pleasure in her cruelty and dismissive attitude towards others. She even suggests that being "good" is just too boring for her, and that she prefers the excitement and unpredictability of being a "bitch".


Overall, the song is a complex and nuanced exploration of the singer's own psyche, and it raises broader questions about the nature of personality, identity, and personal responsibility. It acknowledges the difficulty of changing oneself, but also the dangers of complacency and self-absorption. By confronting the darker corners of herself, the singer reveals a deep vulnerability and raw honesty that is both difficult and rewarding to listen to.


Line by Line Meaning

In Sears and Roebuck in 1957
A time and a place from a past life where good girls were expected to go to heaven.


In my last life, all good girls would go to heaven
In a previous life, women were expected to be good and go to heaven.


But I've a strangeness, a queer propensity
There is something inside the singer that makes her think and feel differently than others.


For twisting the knife too easily
The artist has a tendency to exacerbate problems or situations.


When I think I'm getting better
The artist believes they are making progress towards being a kinder person.


I'm just getting worse
However, the singer's behavior is actually deteriorating.


When I think I've got it made
The singer believes they have achieved personal growth.


I am impossibly cursed
But they are actually stuck in an unchanging, negative behavior pattern.


When did I become such a bitch?
The artist is questioning when her negative behavior became her defining characteristic.


And how did I let this happen?
The artist wonders how she became such a mean person.


I don't know
The singer is uncertain of the answers to her own questions.


I used to be so nice
The artist believes she was once a much kinder person.


It's like a sickness
The negative behavior is a compulsion or addiction.


I'm powerless to stop it
The singer feels unable to change this behavior on her own.


My boring life, my little heart made misanthropic
The singer's mundane life and small-hearted nature have led her to dislike humanity.


Don't give me reasons, just give me therapy
The artist doesn't want reasons for her behavior, she wants to fix it with therapy.


But really, just give me what I want
Ultimately, the artist wants what she desires, not necessarily what is best for her.


But I hate everyone and everything all of the time
The singer's negative behavior includes hating most things, most of the time.


And being so cruel
The singer takes pleasure in being cruel to others.


'Cause all the pleasure that I get
The artist enjoys the rush of being mean to others.


My wicked tongue helps me forget
The artist's insults and hurtful words distract her from her own flaws and problems.


Myself and all my foolish ways
The artist acknowledges her behavior as foolish, but is still compelled to act that way.


'Cause being good is just so fucking boring
The singer sees kindness as unexciting and unfulfilling.


La la la it's boring
This phrase reinforces the idea that being a good person is not interesting to the artist.


When I think that I'm better
The singer still believes she can improve herself.


I'm worse, yes I am
But in reality, the singer's behavior is still negative.


I used to be so nice once upon a time
The singer again reflects on how she used to be a better person, but can't seem to change back.




Contributed by Julia D. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

Cannonfodd

really love her music. have followed her since the first album

Rachel curlylocks

I remember being obsessed with Fires. Love this song! Never knew she released a new album. Thanks for posting. =)

osvanessa

I love this song! Thanks Narina!

Em Anne

Love this song!

headturner411

One of my fave Nerina songs.....most terrifying picture of her ever though.

Amanda Hugnkiss

This. Is. Totally me! I love it!!!!!!

TheHollyVlogs

this song is the story of my life......

Tiddums

Looking forward to seeing Nerina in Manchester in November

DistantDreamer93

@rachelsnape Hello ! No problem at all :) Yeah her third studio album 'The Graduate' was released in October 2009 =)

anne clerigo

Do you have a link to "Jump" recorded version? Can't find it anywhere

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