Oleander was formed by Fred Nelson Jr. (drums), Doug Eldridge (bass guitar), Ric Ivanisevich (guitar) and Thomas Flowers (vocals, guitar) in the mid-90s. Their debut was Oleander, an EP released on Fine Records in 1996, which they followed with the full-length album Shrinking the Blob in 1997. The song "Down When I'm Loaded" became a regional hit, and Oleander signed with Universal Records.
During this time, Nelson left the band and was replaced with Scott Devours. Their major label debut was 1999's February Son which featured the hit singles "Why I'm Here" and "I Walk Alone." After supporting the album with a tour, they released Unwind in 2001. The song "Champion" became a hit, and a symbol of the sacrifice of firefighters during the September 11, 2001 attacks in New York.
Some time later, the band parted ways with Universal Records and moved to Sanctuary, where they released Joyride in 2003.
In November, 2003, drummer Scott Devours issued a statement announcing he was leaving the band to join Ima Robot. The decision was amicable.
The band is on an unofficial hiatus. No statement has been released by the band, however vocalist Thomas Flowers is currently collaborating with the band The Black Summer Crush. The Black Summer Crush have parted ways with front-man Thomas Flowers (ex-Oleander). As a result, the band will now be fronted by Jay Buchanan and have changed the band name to The Pleasant Return. Flowers is rumored to be reuniting with his former Oleander band-mates.
why am i here
Oleander Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
In a season to celebrate
I don't want to be full of hate
For anybody, but it's too late
Everyone has been in my face
Telling me that I'm a disgrace
Showing me things that I must face
I can't love you anymore
I'm scared of the sound of it
It's the reason why I'm down
I'm beaten been pushed around
Hit the ceiling without a sound
Everyone I know considers me a clown
I can't love you anymore
I'm scared of the sound of it
I can't love you anymore
Woman, I just wanted more
I can't love you anymore
Scared of the sound of it
And woman, I just wanted more
It's the reason why I'm here
The lyrics to Oleander's "Why I'm Here" acoustic version describe a person's struggle with love and relationships. The singer is in a season to celebrate, but they are in pain due to their failed relationships. They don't want to hate anyone, but they feel that it's too late to change their circumstances. The singer has been told that they are a disgrace and they must face their problems. They are hurt that everyone considers them a clown.
The chorus of the song, "I can't love you anymore, I'm scared of the sound of it," show that the singer is afraid of falling in love again. They have been hurt so many times that they are afraid to love again. The person they loved wanted more from them, and the singer wasn't able to provide it. The final line, "It's the reason why I'm here," indicates that the singer's struggles with love and relationships have led them to where they are now.
Overall, the lyrics of the song show the pain and struggles that come with failed relationships and the fear of falling in love again. The acoustic version of the song adds to the emotional depth of the lyrics.
Line by Line Meaning
It's the reason for my pain
The cause of my emotional distress
In a season to celebrate
During a time when people should be happy and joyous
I don't want to be full of hate
I do not wish to harbor negative feelings towards anyone
For anybody, but it's too late
It is too late to change the way I feel
Everyone has been in my face
Everyone has been bothering me and confronting me
Telling me that I'm a disgrace
Telling me that I am a shameful and disappointing person
Showing me things that I must face
Pointing out things that I need to confront and deal with
Telling me that they need their space
Asking for distance and privacy
I can't love you anymore
I am unable to continue loving you
I'm scared of the sound of it
I am afraid of the consequences and implications of loving you
It's the reason why I'm down
The cause for my feelings of sadness and depression
I'm beaten been pushed around
I have been physically or emotionally defeated and taken advantage of
Hit the ceiling without a sound
Reached a point of extreme anger or frustration without being able to express it
Everyone I know considers me a clown
Everyone in my social circle sees me as a ridiculous or foolish person
And woman, I just wanted more
I had greater expectations or desires in our relationship
It's the reason why I'm here
The motivation or circumstance that led me to my current situation or location
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group
Written by: DOUGLAS JAMES ELDRIDGE, FRED ROGER JR. NELSON, RICHARD C. IVANISEVICH, THOMAS ALLAN FLOWERS
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
@Karmy.
I first heard this song in February, shortly after my ex bf broke up with me and hearing this song made me cry because of how much I felt like I could relate to it
One of the few times a song ever made me actually cry
"Everyone has been in my face
Telling me that I'm a disgrace"
"It's the reason why I'm down
I'm beaten been pushed around
Hit the ceiling without a sound
Everyone I know considers me a clown"
I can relate to also because of being bullied online for being depressed
I felt like Flowers was talking to me with that opening speech in the Woodstock video
@eensomniac9441
It's the reason for my pain
In a season to celebrate
I don't want to be full of hate
For anybody, but it's too late
Everyone has been in my face
Telling me that I'm a disgrace
Showing me things that I must face
Telling me that they need their space
I can't love you anymore
I'm scared of the sound of it
It's the reason why I'm down
I'm beaten been pushed around
Hit the ceiling without a sound
Everyone I know considers me a clown
I can't love you anymore
I'm scared of the sound of it
I can't love you anymore
Woman, I just wanted more
I can't love you anymore
Scared of the sound of it
And woman, I just wanted more
It's the reason why I'm here
@ImbriumDream
This album has aged well. This music was LIFE when I was a teenager.
@kevincampbell5785
Great way to sum it up.
@thee4thdoctor
any port in a storm
@michaeldomino3334
Agreed!
@nicholasblalock1827
FreeThouhtStorm from
Nicholas Alan Blalock!!! ;-)
@nicholasblalock1827
FreeThoughtStorm
NO DOUBT, BABY GIRL
@twofry64
When a 57 year old grandma turns her 3 year old grandson onto a song and it becomes his favorite song... Yes favorite grandson you're Why I'm here. 💜💛
@HollyLengyel-gu4ht
I Also Am A 57 Years young Grandma of A Three Year Old Who Also
Really DIGS This Song !!
I Did A Double Take When I Seen Your Comment !!
Life Is Short.
Be Young And Have Fun!
Live It Like You MEAN IT!
@twofry64
@@HollyLengyel-gu4ht Thanks! Enjoy that grandchild. They're the best.
@Adino1
The summer of 99 feels like it was a life time ago.