Psycho Street
Richard Thompson Lyrics

A man sits down to write a letter,
A man decides to write a letter to someone, but ends up detailing his thoughts and emotions about that person in a book format.

But instead he writes a book
Though the man intended to write just a letter, he couldn't stop writing and ultimately ended up writing a short book that exposes harsh truths about the recipient and his wife.

A man gets on a train and proceeds
A man enters a train and denudes himself, proceeding to masturbate in the open while telling onlookers in a smug tone that such behavior is acceptable in his country.

To take all his clothes off
The man deliberately removes all his clothing to expose his naked body in front of his co-passengers.

He begins to play with himself, and he says
He commences physical self-gratification while telling co-travelers it is not offensive, without caring about their discomfort.

"In my country, this is definitely not offensive"
The man creates an excuse for his lewd behavior by citing cultural differences and blatantly disregards the sensibilities of his fellow passengers.

A man pours petrol through his neighbour's letterbox
A man maliciously pours gasoline through his neighbor's letterbox to set their house ablaze.

And throws in a match
He adds a lit match that immediately sets the house on fire, endangering the lives of his neighbors.

The house is engulfed in flames
The neighbor's house is set on fire and fully consumed by the flames.

As the neighbours jump from the upstairs window
The neighbors have no choice but to jump from their upstairs room to escape the inferno.

He films the whole thing on video
The culprit records the entire incident and thinks nothing of it.

He plays it back to them later in hospital
He has the gall to play the video back to his neighbors when they are in the hospital recovering from their injuries.

"Things have been pretty dull at home without you" he says
He is sarcastic to his injured neighbors and makes a heartless comment about how things were quite lifeless while they were absent.

A man pushes a lawn mower
A man pushes a lawn mower for two hundred miles on his knees as a form of penance.

Two hundred miles on his knees
The man painfully crawls behind his mower for hundreds of miles to repair a karmic debt.

To the tomb of the unknown gardener
He travels all this way to pay his respects to the gravesite of an anonymous gardener.

"Great one" he cries "I've done my penance.
He declares he has paid back his debt and entreats for pest-free roses.

I bring my offering.
He presents his gift (of the perfectly cropped lawn) before the flowers he has religiously tended to.

Grant me, grant me, grant me, pest-free roses"
After performing his penance, the man requests pest-free roses, hoping that all his hard work will lead to a bountiful outcome.

Psycho Street, friendly people down on Psycho Street
The song title refers to a street full of demented people with bizarre and dangerous behaviors.

Good neighbors down on Psycho Street
The people living on the street are the only ones who think they are friendly and normal, although their actions show the opposite.

And if you need a hand, need a friend, we understand
Despite their strange behaviors, they claim to offer assistance and support to anyone who requires it.

And if you need a pal, we'll be there, anyhow
They promise to be available whenever needed, as they consider themselves good neighbors.

A man stakes his neighbour's cat
A man cruelly stakes his neighbor's feline pet firmly to a barbecue and threatens to hurt it.

To the barbecue and turns on the gas
He turns on the gas, actively endangering his neighbor's cat.

"Now are you going to talk" he says
He threatens to harm the helpless animal and demands information from his neighbor.

"Or am I going to have to get nasty?"
He warns his neighbor that he's willing to do anything to force him into revealing sensitive information.

A man has an inflatable doll made
A man has a replica of his wife made in the form of an inflatable doll.

That looks exactly like his wife
The likeness between his wife and the doll is outstandingly precise.

He murders his wife, dissolves her body in acid
The sinister man kills his real wife and disposes of her body by dissolving it in acid.

And marries the doll
He replaces his murdered wife with the inflatable replica and thinks nothing of the moral or legal ramifications of his actions.

Three years later, he leaves her for another doll
After three years of being with his inflatable wife, he decides to divorce her to be with another inflatable doll.

A man hands his son a brick and says
A father hands over a brick to his young son with nefarious intentions.

"Son, throw this brick through the greenhouse next door"
He commands his son to throw the brick through the neighbor's greenhouse and cause damage to their property.

The boy does
The young boy carries out his father's orders without knowing they are wrong.

The boy next door throws one back
The neighbor whose greenhouse has been attacked retaliates by throwing a brick back at the man and his young son.

It hits the man on the head and mortally wounds him
Unfortunately, the man is hit on the head and meets his untimely end.

"Ah well" he says, as his life blood trickles away
The man accepts his fate as he dies from the injury inflicted on him.

"Boys will be boys"
Before he dies, the man tries to justify his actions and those of his son, claiming that they were simply 'boys being boys'.

A thoughtful woman sends her best friend a parcel
A woman sends a parcel to her best friend that is supposed to contain a sample of a full body beauty treatment.

Inside, it says, is a free sample, full body beauty treatment
The package is labeled as having free samples of a full body beauty treatment, which the woman believes is what's inside.

But really it contains acids and chemicals
Instead, the package contains harsh acid and chemicals that have the opposite effect of stated.

When her friend tries it, her hair falls out,
When the best friend takes the beauty treatment, her hair starts falling out as a result of the harsh chemicals included.

Her face is wrinkled and her body scarred
The treatment causes a wrinkled complexion with unsightly scars on her skin, ruining her appearance.

The thoughtful woman turns to her husband and winks
The package sender slyly winks to her husband as she watches her friend suffer from the effects of the harmful substances she sent her.

And says "Pre-emptive strike"
She calls this act of cruelty a pre-emptive strike, as if her friend had done something wrong previously to provoke this violent response.