The Contest
Sacha Baron Cohen Lyrics
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Da king of da barbers,
Da barber of kings,
E buon giorno, good day,
I blow you a kiss!
And I, da so-famous Pirelli,
I wish-a to know-a
Who has-a da nerve-a to say
Who says this?!
I do I am Mr. Sweeney Todd of Fleet Street. I have
Opened a bottle of Pirelli's elixir, and I say to you
That it is nothing but an errant fraud, concocted fr om
Piss and ink. And furthermore Signor" I have
Serviced no kings, yet I wager I can shave a cheek with
Ten times more dexterity than any street mountebank
You hear zis foolish man? Now, please, you will see
How he will regret his folly!
Who's for a free shave? Will Beadle Bamford be
The judge?
Glad, as always, to oblige my friends and neighbors.
Th e fastest, smoothest shave is the winner.
Now, signorini, signori,
We mix-a da lather
But fi rst-a you gather
Around, signorini, signori,
You looking a man
Who have had-a da glory
To shave-a da Pope!
Mr. Sweeney whoever
I beg-a your pardon'll
Probably say it was only a cardinal
Nope!
It was-a da Pope!
To shave-a da face,
To cut-a da hair,
Require da grace,
Require da fl air,
For if-a you slip,
You nick-a da skin,
You clip-a da chin,
You rip-a da lip a bit
Beyond-a repair
To shave-a da face
Or even a part
Widout it-a smart
Require da heart.
Not just-a da fl ash,
It take-a panache,
It take-a da passion
For da art.
To shave-a da face,
To trim-a da beard,
To make-a da bristle
Clean like a whistle,
Dis is from early infancy
Da talent give to me
By God!
It take-a da skill,
It take-a da brains,
It take-a da will
To take-a da pains,
It take-a da pace,
It take-a da grace
The winner is Todd
The lyrics above are from the song "The Contest" in the musical adaptation of Sweeney Todd, written by Stephen Sondheim. The scene features two rival barbers, Adolfo Pirelli and Sweeney Todd, who are contesting to see who can give the smoothest shave. Pirelli, who is flamboyant and boastful, sings his praises as the king of barbers and accuses anyone who thinks otherwise of calling his elixir a fraud. Sweeney Todd, on the other hand, bluntly states that the elixir is a sham made of piss and ink. As the competition begins, Todd shows off his skill, claiming that he can shave a cheek with ten times more dexterity than any street hawker. The two barbers engage in a sing-off, each demonstrating their shaving abilities, and Todd ultimately emerges as the winner of the contest.
The song, "The Contest," contains several themes and motifs that run throughout the musical. The first theme is that of deception, particularly in reference to Pirelli's elixir. Throughout Sweeney Todd, characters deceive each other and themselves, leading to tragic consequences. Pirelli's elixir serves as a symbol of this deception, as it is a bogus product designed to prey on people's insecurities. The second theme is that of skill and artistry. Both Pirelli and Todd consider their shaving abilities to be an art form, requiring grace, passion, and skill. The contest between the two barbers is a demonstration of their artistry, and the winner is the one who can best demonstrate their mastery.
Overall, "The Contest" is a lively and theatrical number that showcases the contrasting personalities of the two barbers while adding to the dramatic tension of the musical.
Line by Line Meaning
I am Adolfo Pirelli,
Introducing myself as Adolfo Pirelli
Da king of da barbers,
I am the king of barbers
Da barber of kings,
Barber chosen by Kings
E buon giorno, good day,
Greeting with Good Day
I blow you a kiss!
Sending a kiss to show respect
And I, da so-famous Pirelli,
I am the famous Pirelli
I wish-a to know-a
I want to know
Who has-a da nerve-a to say
Who has the audacity to say
My elixir is piss!
That my elixir is worthless
Who says this?!
Who said this?!
I do, I am Mr. Sweeney Todd of Fleet Street.
I did. I am Mr. Sweeney Todd.
I have opened a bottle of Pirelli's elixir, and I say to you
I have opened Pirelli's elixir and to me it is nothing but a worthless fraud made of urine and ink.
That it is nothing but an errant fraud, concocted from Piss and ink. And furthermore Signor" I have
I claim that it is a fraudulent creation, made from urine and ink. Moreover, I would like to add that I have not served any kings, but I am confident that I can give a shave far better than any street vendor.
Serviced no kings, yet I wager I can shave a cheek with Ten times more dexterity than any street mountebank
I did not serve any kings but I bet I can shave better than any street seller
You hear zis foolish man? Now, please, you will see How he will regret his folly!
Do you hear this foolish man? Now you will see him regret his mistake.
Who's for a free shave? Will Beadle Bamford be The judge?
Anyone want a free shave? Beadle Bamford will be the judge?
Glad, as always, to oblige my friends and neighbors. The fastest, smoothest shave is the winner.
I am happy to help my friends and neighbors (by shaving them). The person who gets the fastest and smoothest shave will be the winner.
Now, signorini, signori, We mix-a da lather But first-a you gather
Now gentlemen and ladies, we'll mix the lather. But first, gather around.
Around, signorini, signori, You looking a man Who have had-a da glory To shave-a da Pope!
Let me tell you ladies and gentlemen, that I'm the one who had the privilege to shave the Pope once!
Mr. Sweeney whoever I beg-a your pardon'll Probably say it was only a cardinal Nope! It was-a da Pope!
Mr. Sweeney, whoever he is, might apologize that I actually shaved a cardinal and not the pope. But, Let me assure you it was the Pope who had to receive my razor.
To shave-a da face, To cut-a da hair, Require da grace, Require da fl air, For if-a you slip, You nick-a da skin, You clip-a da chin, You rip-a da lip a bit Beyond-a repair
Shaving the face and haircutting require skill and style. If you make a mistake, you can cut skin, clip the chin, or rip the lip.
To shave-a da face Or even a part Widout it-a smart Require da heart.
To shave any body part smoothly without causing pain requires not only skill, but also courage.
Not just-a da fl ash, It take-a panache, It take-a da passion For da art
It is more than just skill, it also takes flair and passion for this art.
To shave-a da face,To trim-a da beard,To make-a da bristleClean like a whistle,Dis is from early infancyDa talent give to meBy God!
Shaving the face and trimming the beard to make it whistle clean have been my talent since early age, and I believe it is God-given.
It take-a da skill, It take-a da brains, It take-a da will To take-a da pains, It take-a da pace, It take-a da grace
The art of barbering requires skill, intelligence, willpower, patience, pace, and grace.
The winner is Todd
The winner is Sweeney Todd.
Lyrics © Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Written by: STEPHEN SONDHEIM
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Shutter Authority
Real genius! Would love to see all the Who is America characters have a discussion together.
Mild Misanthrope
Erran Morad would waterboard Dr. Nira Cain-N'Degeocello.
Dom Thomas
@Life to Fullest really living ‘life to the fullest’ going on each comment reply ‘nah’ 😂
Life to Fullest
Nah
R0DiCUL0US
This was gold! Please make another Bruno movie! It would be wunderbar
Di P.
Macht schnell
IbokRock811
How could I forget just how many genius characters this dude has created?!? I feel like he really is all those people 😅☺️ Lifelong fan and 100% deserved
HF Trust
@Dom I think they meant Cohen eats Dee's Nuts.
david vickers
If he wasnt famous and on tv, he would be locked up in a mental ward talking to himself.
Dom
@Life to Fullest we appreciate your input