The band consisted of Scott Spillane, John D'Azzo and Will Westbrook, college roommates in Ruston, LA. Along with sometimes-cellist Penny Burbank, they released a couple singles on a variety of record labels from 1996-1998 before recording an album (which included the four previously-released songs) in 1998 on Hidden Agenda Records.
Spillane's Neutral Milk Hotel bandmate Jeremy Barnes eventually joined as drummer, which drove the somewhat twee pop sound of the band's first album towards a more energetic hard rock. The members of the band decided to unofficially call it quits with a farewell show in 1999 in Athens. While D'Azzo pursued interests in California, Spillane and Westbrook (with the help of members of Of Montreal, Elf Power, and Neutral Milk Hotel) finished mixing the album that was completed with Chris Bishop prior to their separation. Once The Battle of Electricity was finished, the Gerbils did a national tour with Elf Power before again separating.
Once again, the band has reformed, playing regularly and becoming fully active. A third Gerbils album was in pre-production before December 11th, 2006, when guitarist Will Westbrook passed away, after which the band disbanded.
Crayon Box
The Gerbils Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
How could you go out and watch the show without me
You know that Portastatic is still my favourite band
Am I alone or are you with me
Me with you, what ever
Could you tell me just one more time
I just don't understand
Look what you've done
How could you do it
You left me behind again
I feel so empty
Should I think that something is wrong
Should I try to do a thing about it
As the band plays on
Look what I've done
How could I do it
I left you behind this time
Even though I know that Sebadoh is still your favourite band
I'm not laughing but I thought I would be
Wouldn't you be laughing at me
As the band played on
The Gerbils' "Crayon Box" is a song about the complexities of a relationship and the sense of abandonment that sometimes occurs between partners. The song begins with the singer expressing their dismay at being left behind while their partner went to see a concert of their favorite band, Portastatic. The singer wonders if they are alone or if their partner is with them, and expresses frustration at not understanding the situation. The tone of the song is plaintive and questioning, with a sense of vulnerability that suggests the singer feels somewhat powerless.
As the song progresses, the singer turns the narrative around, reflecting on a time when they themselves left their partner behind to see Sebadoh, another favorite band. The song ends with a wistful sense of longing, as the band plays on and the relationship remains unresolved.
Overall, "Crayon Box" is a song about the give and take of relationships, and the ways that partners can feel both hurt and guilty for leaving one another behind. It highlights the importance of communication and understanding, as well as the fragility of human connections.
Line by Line Meaning
Look what you've done
You've hurt me with your actions.
How could you go out and watch the show without me
You went to watch the show without me, which hurts me.
You know that Portastatic is still my favourite band
I still love Portastatic and you should know that.
Am I alone or are you with me
I need to know if you support me or not.
Me with you, what ever
Regardless of what you say, I'll still be with you.
Could you tell me just one more time
I need to hear it again from you to believe it.
I just don't understand
I'm having a hard time comprehending the situation.
Am I a child or just a crayon in your filthy hand
I feel like you're manipulating me like a child's toy, and it's not right.
Look what you've done
You've hurt me again.
How could you do it
You've done something to hurt me.
You left me behind again
You abandoned me and it makes me feel worthless.
I feel so empty
I'm left with nothing after you left me behind.
Should I think that something is wrong
I'm not sure if you're intentionally hurting me or not.
Should I try to do a thing about it
I'm not sure what to do to fix the situation.
As the band plays on
Despite our situation, the music continues to play.
Look what I've done
I've made a mistake.
How could I do it
I'm questioning my own actions and how they affected you.
I left you behind this time
I abandoned you and I'm sorry.
Even though I know that Sebadoh is still your favourite band
I still remember your favourite band even if I made a mistake.
I'm not laughing but I thought I would be
I expected to find some sort of humor in the situation, but I don't.
Wouldn't you be laughing at me
I wonder if you would find it amusing if our roles were reversed.
As the band played on
The music continues to play, despite our mistakes and differences.
Contributed by Ellie W. Suggest a correction in the comments below.