That same year he teamed up with Detroit natives TnT and Mastamind and formed the group Natas, whose controversial debut Life After Death has been blamed for the suicide of a Tennessee youth. After another EP released in 1992 entitled Hellter Skkkelter dropped, Esham's most recognized and most controversial album 1993's KKKill the Fetus hit stores. The cover of this album depicted an unborn fetus and the title track was a song explaining why unfit, drug addicted mothers should chose abortion over birth. Esham followed up with Natas' Blaz4me and another solo Closed Casket. This was all a prelude to another controversial release, Doubelievengod. Tracks such as "Pop Pop", "Sunday School", and "Heaven" set an unprecedented mark for evilness in rap music. Esham later released his final album on RLP, Dead Flowerz. This was a transitional period into Esham's new Gothom label. Bruce Wayne/Gothom City introduced the world to the new age Esham. After this release the head nodding, trunk rattling Multikillionaire was released.
After a 2-year break, E hit the scene with the colorful Mail Dominance CD. This CD had everything from slow jams, retrospectives on lost ones, wickedness, to 50's samples. The next release is what many feel was the critically acclaimed WWW.com. In 2001, Esham released what would become his smoothest album, Tongues. Followed by Natas 6th release Godlike. Esham resume of albums includes 10 full albums, 4 EPs, 3 greatest hits compilations, and 6 releases with Natas. Not to mention working with and producing for Bone Thugs-N-Harmony, Ghetto E, Kool Keith, Insane Clown Posse, and the Dayton Family. From 1989 to 2005, Esham has given fans his heavy doses of Reel Life, Heavy Mental music. Esham truly revolutionized Detroit's rap sound and is a local legend.
Eminem has listed Esham as an influence, as he mentions on his debut album, The Slim Shady LP. Esham's next album, A1 Yola, was released April 19th, 2005 by Psychopathic Records. Included with the album was also a DVD with videos to every song, making Esham the first artist to make a music video for every song on an album. Towards the end of 2005 Esham could no longer be a part of Psychopathic Records. His last concert under the label was at the 5th Annual Gathering of the Juggalos. He contributed to the Soopa Villainz project and later left. The split was on bad terms according to acidrap.com. The reason, also according to acidrap.com, was that Psychopathic Records did not allow him to use the name The Unholy,The Black Devil or the group NATAS. Athough bitterness was expressed by both parties directly after the split, Esham and Psychopathic have since publicly apoligized to one another, and stated that any past grievances are water under the bridge.
On June 6, 2006 (6/6/06) Esham released the Judgement Day box set, Rap's first $100 box set, available only through the Natas website. This set includes Judgement Day Vol.1 and 2, the previously unreleased Judgement Day Vol.3 and 4, a new 6 track Esham EP, and a DVD featuring concert footage from '04. Only 1,000 have been produced.
Losin My Religion
Esham Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Things ain't the same, I'm goin' back down memory lane.
And as I travel, dirt roads of gravel,
Two sets of foot prints for me and my shadow.
The unholy speaks as I walk in my sleep,
And my speech makes you weak, means my words are too deep.
You see soceity's strung on a Bible and a man,
With the will of the devil to destory and he can.
Should I be a vegeterian, or die, eat swine.
Can I lose my religon, every day, it's a habit,
Is religon just for kids or am I a silly rabbit?
Am I lost in a book that says sins are forbiden,
Who am I to believe when the Bible was really written?
I don't know, will I die?
I can't live in a lie,
Cross my heart and hope to die,
I'm losin my religon.
Am I wrong or insane, using God's name in vain,
When the preacher sells cocaine, how am I to be sane.
See first he's a preacher, now he's slangin' ki's,
College educated from workin' at Mickey D's.
I got no say in the world today,
Livin' in AmeriKKK.
You call me the devil 'cause I refuse to pray,
But your religious games I refuse to play.
Bible study's not my buddy,
Shake the preacher, now my hand's all bloody.
Daily gossip, religious philosophies,
Nigga please, I'm losin my religon.
In Esham's song "Losin My Religion," the rapper takes a trip back in time to explore the notion of religion and its impact on society. As he travels down memory lane, he questions the role of religion in society and whether it is just a habit or a requirement. Esham initially contemplates the idea of being a vegetarian, showing that he is questioning his actions and choices. The idea of man destroying and society relying on the Bible is also explored in the song. Esham's words are "too deep," making his speech weak.
Esham then elaborates on the preacher who sells cocaine, questioning his sanity for using God's name in vain. Living in AmeriKKKA, where he feels he has no say in the world today, Esham expresses his disillusionment with the system. He doesn't play into religious games like Bible studies, and he even shakes the preacher's hand, leaving it bloody. The song speaks to the struggle of identity and religion, and the conflict between being oneself and following societal norms.
Line by Line Meaning
Let's take a trip, back into time, as I explain,
Let's take a journey back into my past, as I try to explain my struggles with religion.
Things ain't the same, I'm goin' back down memory lane.
Things have changed for me, and I'm reflecting on the past.
And as I travel, dirt roads of gravel,
As I reminisce, the path is rough and bumpy.
Two sets of foot prints for me and my shadow.
I walk with a constant companion, but even my shadow can't keep up.
The unholy speaks as I walk in my sleep,
My dreams are haunted by dark and negative thoughts.
And my speech makes you weak, means my words are too deep.
My words make you uncomfortable because they cut deep and reveal uncomfortable truths.
You see soceity's strung on a Bible and a man,
Religion has a hold on society and its beliefs.
With the will of the devil to destory and he can.
There are people in power who use religion for their own destructive purposes.
You see, time after time, have I made up my mind,
I have struggled with my beliefs again and again.
Should I be a vegeterian, or die, eat swine.
I question what is right or wrong, even in my dietary choices.
Can I lose my religon, every day, it's a habit,
I wonder if I can break free of religion, even though it's become a habit for me.
Is religon just for kids or am I a silly rabbit?
I question if religion is only for the naive, or if I'm foolish for still believing.
Am I lost in a book that says sins are forbiden,
I feel trapped by religious doctrines that forbid certain actions.
Who am I to believe when the Bible was really written?
I question the authenticity and reliability of religious texts.
I don't know, will I die?
I don't have all the answers, and I fear dying without figuring them out.
I can't live in a lie,
I can't continue to fake my beliefs and live a lie.
Cross my heart and hope to die,
I swear to tell the truth and face the consequences.
I'm losin my religon.
I'm struggling to hold onto my beliefs and faith in religion.
Am I wrong or insane, using God's name in vain,
I question if I'm sinning or being disrespectful to God by questioning religious practices and beliefs.
When the preacher sells cocaine, how am I to be sane.
I am confused and disillusioned by religious leaders engaging in sinful or unethical behavior.
See first he's a preacher, now he's slangin' ki's,
Religious leaders can appear to be righteous but can also have dark secrets and engage in criminal activities.
College educated from workin' at Mickey D's.
The education system and job opportunities can fail certain individuals, leading to a life of crime.
I got no say in the world today,
I feel powerless to the corrupt system and society that surrounds me.
Livin' in AmeriKKK.
Living in America isn't what it appears to be, due to systemic issues and racism.
You call me the devil 'cause I refuse to pray,
Others label me as evil or sinful because I don't conform to their religious beliefs.
But your religious games I refuse to play.
I reject the manipulative and oppressive tactics of organized religion.
Bible study's not my buddy,
I find little comfort or enlightenment in Bible study.
Shake the preacher, now my hand's all bloody.
I want to confront religious leaders about their wrongdoing, but it may result in harm or violence.
Daily gossip, religious philosophies,
Religious practices and beliefs can become trivialized and treated as mindless chatter.
Nigga please, I'm losin my religon.
I am fed up with religious hypocrisy and feel like I'm losing my faith altogether.
Lyrics © O/B/O APRA AMCOS
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind