Funkoars members are Mr Trials (Producer/MC), Uncle Sesta (Producer/MC), Sketchy Hons (MC) and DJ Reflux (DJ)
Funkoars were founded on the unique personalities of four individuals. These larger than life musicians were drawn to each other not just from a love of music, but their light hearted and jovial outlook on life.
It’s these personalities coupled with their prodigious talent that has brought Funkoars their success. The energetic and humorous nature of their lyrics is not something that can be emulated. While they may sometimes walk the thin line between disgusting and ludicrous, it's been this cutting edge mix that has brought their music so much attention.
The Oars’ achievements extend beyond their works as group. Trials is also a prolific producer, having crafted tracks for the likes of Hilltop Hoods, Cross Bred Mongrels, Vents and most recently Drapht‘s album Brothers Grimm. Both Vents and Drapht have had massive success with their respective Trials produced singles, 'Love Song' and 'Jimmy Recard', added to high rotation on Triple J.
Now one of the country's most sought after producers, Trials has his plate full for the immediate future with a new Vents album on the books and a side gig as a dispenser of no-nonsense advice in rhyme form in his regular column for Ralph magazine.
Not happy to rest on their past achievements or be pigeonholed by critics for their inimitable style, the Oars have evolved yet again and will bring a brand new sound to the table. The Hangover is poised to be the most talked about hip hop album from Australia in 2008, hands down.
Kidney Shifters
Funkoars Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
"Here we go here we go...",
"I got the funk flow to make your jaws drop",
"I got the funk flow, I got the funk flow",
"I got the funk flow to make you... make you kidney shift".
[Verse 1 - Trials]
Give me a stage,
The name's Trials baby, professional home wrecker.
I got this license to step inside ciphers,
And cum tighter than vaginas with four fingers inside 'em.
So step to a battle, but take the cowards route,
I'ma power house destroying rhymes until the power's out.
What the fuck made you think that these toys were dope?
I was flippin' twice as nice before my VOIce had broke.
You better gift-wrap my nuts, suck the shaft to the bottom,
When I'm rocking mics random lives just start dropping.
We're top of this shit like garnishes, every time I test ya,
You're like fat chicks on a jetty - under peer pressure.
Try your heart out, become a dope rapper,
I'ma still die hard like overdosing on Viagra.
Now that's what happens when the Funkoars rip ya,
We stomp the break, and shake your place is richter.
[Chorus - Trials]
If your name's Mila Kunis,
(You're getting kidney shifted).
After ten rounds of schooners,
(You're getting kidney shifted)
Blonde girls with fake hooters,
(You're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted.)
[Hook]
[Verse 2 - Sesta]
Check it, when I'm live on the mic,
Replies are about as tight as a hooker on a loooooong night.
Your verses post-mortem,
Battle Funkoars then you might as well release Martin Bryant and live the battle.
Semi-autos, 'cause we at it again,
The crowd we packing 'em in while you panicking friend.
So take your man and make like a manikin,
Shut the fuck up, sit down, don't talk, (Don't move)
Shake it like your mothers arm after she's waving me,
Late in the morning, after I double dated her with your sister,
Say Sesta eventually, got sick of faggots having to mention me.
Man I could sit and babble about back stabbers and faggots,
Spitting them ones, tag-alongs think they're rappers.
If I'ma rapper who claims he's ahead of his time,
Well fuck it, I'm going back to the future and racking his rhyme.
[Chorus 2 - Sesta]
If your name's J. Lopez,
(You're getting kidney shifted)
If you don't deep throat then,
(You're getting kidney shifted)
Even over phone sex you're,
(You're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted)
[Hook]
[Verse 3 - Hons]
Fuck the weasel in my books, it's pop goes the virgin,
Get trashed and crash strip clubs instead of rehearsin'.
My flow worsening the more schooners I have,
I'd rather be boozing than rap and kick losers off tracks,
So, pump your fists if you feel this.
Hons will show Christina how to get dirty in a film clip.
I bomb tracks like Pearl Harbor,
Sometimes people take it the wrong way like smacking up marijuana.
Hard on that and throw your best raps and mack kid,
There's no turning back like knockin' up a Catholic.
I need to keep my raps tight like gaps that's slight,
Or Joe Cusumano on a honeymoon night.
I like to roll play with fantasies, get kinky with our bed,
Long legs, thick breasts, I'm as shallow as Hals head.
Think you're better than me? Fucking get your facts checked,
I ain't hostile, I just sit there when I got no cash left.
[Chorus 3 - Hons]
If your name's Kylie Minogue,
(You're getting kidney shifted)
If you bite when you blow,
(You're getting kidney shifted)
Babies sitting home alone,
(You're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted)
The opening hook of Funkoars’s song “Kidney Shifters” invokes the proclamation “Here we go” and a string of references to the power of the group’s “funk flow.” The rap verses that follow are an extended boast session highlighting the group’s ability to dominate both the mic and the competition. Rapper Trials, for example, brags about his ability to “cum tighter than vaginas with four fingers inside ‘em,” while Sesta boasts about verses that render his opponents “post-mortem.” Hons makes references to Pearl Harbor and Joe Cusumano on his honeymoon night, bringing his own particular brand of swagger to the song. Throughout all three verses, the theme of dominance and conquest is vividly present, with the chorus repeatedly stating that anyone who falls afoul of the Funkoars is apt to “get kidney shifted.”
Line by Line Meaning
Here we go here we go...
The song is starting, get ready for some sick rhymes.
I got the funk flow to make your jaws drop
My rap skills are so good, they'll leave you in awe.
I got the funk flow, I got the funk flow
I have an amazing ability to spit rhymes.
I got the funk flow to make you... make you kidney shift
My rhymes are so powerful, they'll make you feel like your kidneys are shifting inside your body.
Give me a stage,
A mic, three pints of dope nectar.
All I need to perform is a stage and a mic, and I'm fueled by my love for music.
The name's Trials baby, professional home wrecker.
I'm Trials, and I'm so good at what I do that I can break down any competitor's rhymes.
I got this license to step inside ciphers,
And cum tighter than vaginas with four fingers inside 'em.
I have the skill and permission to enter freestyle rap battles, and my rhymes are so tight that they're like a vagina with four fingers inside it.
So step to a battle, but take the cowards route,
I'ma power house destroying rhymes until the power's out.
If you challenge me to a rap battle, don't even bother trying to compete, because I'll keep going and going until you give up.
What the fuck made you think that these toys were dope?
Why did you think your rhymes were good enough to take on me and the Funkoars?
Now that's what happens when the Funkoars rip ya,
We stomp the break, and shake your place is richter.
If you try to step to the Funkoars, we'll take you down and leave a lasting impact.
If your name's Mila Kunis,
(You're getting kidney shifted).
Even famous people like Mila Kunis aren't safe from our vicious rhymes.
Check it, when I'm live on the mic,
Replies are about as tight as a hooker on a loooooong night.
When I'm performing, the responses from my audience are as positive and enthusiastic as a prostitute's tight grip on a client all night long.
Your verses post-mortem,
Battle Funkoars then you might as well release Martin Bryant and live the battle.
Your rhymes will be dead on arrival when compared to ours, and you might as well let convicted killer Martin Bryant out of prison and let him fight instead.
If I'ma rapper who claims he's ahead of his time,
Well fuck it, I'm going back to the future and racking his rhyme.
If someone thinks they're a cutting-edge rapper, I'll go back in time to when their style was relevant and do it better.
Fuck the weasel in my books, it's pop goes the virgin,
Get trashed and crash strip clubs instead of rehearsin'.
I don't care about following the rules or being polite - I'd rather get drunk and party at strip clubs than practice my rhymes.
I bomb tracks like Pearl Harbor,
Sometimes people take it the wrong way like smacking up marijuana.
I destroy beats and tracks like the bombing of Pearl Harbor, but some people interpret my rhymes in the wrong way, like someone getting aggressive with marijuana.
Think you're better than me? Fucking get your facts checked,
I ain't hostile, I just sit there when I got no cash left.
Don't think you're better than me until you check the facts; I'm not trying to start trouble, I'm just broke and can't do anything about it.
If your name's Kylie Minogue,
(You're getting kidney shifted).
Even famous singers like Kylie Minogue can't escape our rap onslaught.
Babies sitting home alone,
(You're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted, you're getting kidney shifted)
Even helpless infants at home alone wouldn't be safe from the wrath of our rhymes.
Contributed by Andrew B. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
CH3353N1NJ45
Gotta love the classics
Jack Doig Collinw
The memories 😍
Jake Whwhrvd
Legend!
DENTALplan
Bro they took it down from Spotify and it doesn't exist on SoundCloud, I hate today's society
DENTALplan
Official - C L U D O E W S. It's all good mate I uploaded the song onto SoundCloud about a year ago, not many listens but atleast people could find it
Graeme Vaporama
Greatest track
Quads Quadsone
Ahh the memories
Donna Tebble
I'm a Funkoars Virgin 😮 no, seriously!!! Pomie girl lived in Adelaide for 24yrs ffs .... Fuckingggg love em 🤙👌 Dirty filthy and just god dam Sweet as fuck 😜 ok, so first time I heard this was last week 29 June 2023 , "Kitty Shifted" .... Wow....they are soooo bad they're Good ay 😉🇦🇺🐨