Calling You
Guilty & The Orientals Lyrics

We have lyrics for 'Calling You' by these artists:

Amanda Perez I keep calling you. Tell me, was it something I said? Callin…
Angel City Life ain't easy, let the sun shine through Let me hear…
Anna Soares Delightful lies, they make you mine (Until you make me crawl…
Aqua C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you Calling you now C-A-L-L-I…
ave;new feat. 羽月達也 A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
Barbra Streisand A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Blue October There's something that I can't quite explain I'm so in love…
Bob Telson Desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wher…
Busker busker 버스커 버스커 거리에 쌓인 수많은 눈빛이 날 이상하게 봐 모두 날 피해가 이상한…

C-C-B Callin' on, calling on you I be callin' on, calling…
Céline Dion A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Celine Dion A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wh…
Celine Dion & Lara Fabian A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Christian Falk A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
Cole Holly A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wh…
Dave Kimball Your fading fast your feeling helpless and alone, some how y…
Deasonika A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than w…
Deena Love A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wh…
Deninger Blasmuski A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
dj combo & sherman de vries ft. tony t & alba kras The Wrath of God came pouring down on Saint John and…
Dorota Osińska A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Edyta Górniak A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better…
Ele Sadness is resting On my blue soul The longing and tears of…
Falk Christian A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
Gal Costa A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wh…
George Michael and Queen Calling You (George Michael and Queen) A desert road fro…
George Michael and Queen with Lisa Stansfield A desert road From Vegas to nowhere Some place better than w…
George Michael Feat. Queen A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than w…
Gerry Beckley A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better…
Grace Deeb Always in my head. You were never too far .I know it…
Hank Williams When you've strayed from the fold And there's trouble in you…
Holly Cole A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wh…
Holly Cole Trio A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than w…
Jai You're amazing You are awesome You are worthy Oh so worth…
Jai feat. Lecrae You're amazing (yup yup yup) You are awesome (ah ah ah…
Jai Feat.Lecrae You're amazing You are awesome You are worthy Oh so worth…
Jeff Buckley a desert road from vegas to nowhere some place better than…
Jevetta Steele A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
Juju A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Julie Desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than wher…
Juliette Schoppmann A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Jully Black I don't know why you told me lie after lie Better…
Justin Furstenfeld Theres something that I cant quite, explain I'm so in love…
K.Will Oneuldo nae nunapeul seuchinda mae-iri shi-gan seuchyeo chin…
Kanon Calling you A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace b…
Kari You've got a story to tell And a place to come…
Kari Rueslåtten you've got a story to tell and a place to come…
Kasia Klich A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Kat DeLuna I'm feeling like I got the world in the palm…
Kate Ceberano Kate***************************** Ceberano - Calling You A *…
KB It must have been 3 A.M. when the text came…
KJ-52 feat. J.R. Each and every time I call Each and every time I…
Kj-52 [feat. J.R.] I don't care what you do You don't care what I…
Lara Fabian Un chemin dans le désert entre Las Vegas et nulle…
Love Psychedelico Love you 夜明けまで I miss you, baby まだ生まれない不安にただ dancing alone 好…
M.I.G. The heat is up Can you come closer now Got my mind…
Machiavel Calling you by Machiavel (Thierry Plas, Roland De Greef, Mar…
Matt Fuze Walk thru da path, Seen da light demons ima fight, how…
Midnight Generation Im calling you Don’t hang up the phone Im not a fool,…
Miss Dominique A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better tham…
MY FIRST STORY I didn't know why I came so far Was I blind…
Natalie Cole Desert road from Vegas to nowhere Somewhere better than wher…
October Blue It's something I can't quite explain I'm so in love with…
Our Mirage I can’t be with myself and all I am is just…
Paloma San Basilio A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Paul Young A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better…
Phil Keaggy Inside, peering through my mind's eye Looking to another tim…
picci You Watch it Long it and crave it The world is a…
PIERRE DE CHARMOY Never like me to wonder why Children of the world, black…
Pixxie ลองมาคุยกันไหม ไม่ต้องเล่นแล้วมั้ง ตอบไวไม่ผิดหวัง ถ้าเราคบก…
Princessa This is a message from the city of love... You told…
Queen & George Michael & Lisa Stansfield A desert road From Vegas to nowhere Some place better than w…
Queen ft. George Michael A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Someplace better than w…
Queen/George Michael A desert road From Vegas to nowhere Some place better than w…
Radio Killer Let me hear you say "I love you" Let me hear…
Ralph Stanley When you've strayed from the fold and there's trouble in…
Ravi For jeg ensa ikke bladene for bare trær men så kom du du-du …
RED HOT AND BLUE It's something I can't quite explain I'm so in love with…
Reset You came into my life When I was so confused You made…
Restless Spirits Calling You (Music: Tony Hernando-Victor Díez, Lyrics: Tony …
Richard Marx I had a dream that you stood right in…
Rigmor Gustafsson and radio.string.quartet.vienna WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME NOW LEAD SINGER & BASS: Jason…
Roll Days 流れ行く雲と広がる空に希望だけを抱きしめて出発(たびだち)の日には涙見せずに笑顔で別れを告げる I'm call…
Shy FX & T Power A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Sissel (Bob Telson) A hot dry wind blows right through me The…
Sissel Kyrkjebø A hot dry wind blows right through me The baby′s crying And…
Soul & Spirit Calling You (Music: Tony Hernando-Victor Díez, Lyrics: Tony …
Steele Jevetta A desert road from Vegas to nowhere, Some place better than…
Superbus Calling you to say hello I ain't gonna do that I ain't…
Sylvain Luc A desert road from Vegas to nowhere Some place better than…
Tally Koren I Am Calling You …
The Cut CALLING YOU Verdict are based upon a T shirt Logic is acid…
The Yale Red Hot and Blue It's something I can't quite explain I'm so in love with…
This Boy I've never really needed Someone to love I guarded myself No…
U-One 희미하게 들려 날 부르는 소리가 So I'm walking, I'm walking to…
Williams Hank When you've strayed from the fold And there's trouble in yo…
Yale Red Hot & Blue It's something I can't quite explain I'm so in love with…
~ Lara Fabian Un chemin dans le désert entre Las Vegas et nulle…
刘蕴晴 Friday morning we kissed the rain and said goodbye Monday mo…
矢野顕子悲しいことがあった日は早くひとりになりたい手をにぎってほしい時はいつもいつもひとりきり声がみえるからでんわを…
대국남아(The BOSS) Calling you Ku mй so nu nel te myon Ga jang mon…
버스커 버스커 거리에 쌓인 수많은 눈빛이 날 이상하게 봐 모두 날 피해가 이상한…

We have lyrics for these tracks by Guilty:

Guilty Wow-oh-oh-oh-oh Wow-oh-oh-oh-oh, yeah Kiss! 飛ばして連れ去りたいから返事…

II Counting cards cause I'm out of luck I gotta bring down…

The lyrics are frequently found in the comments by searching or by filtering for lyric videos

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01Every Breath You Take4:41

02With or Without You4:03

03Purple Rain5:11

04Careless Whisper5:25

05Live To Tell3:15

06Save A Prayer5:13

07Take My Breath Away3:09

08Time After Time2:58

09I Will Always Love You3:24

10Calling You3:19

PT3M19S

Guilty & The Orientals

11My Heart Will Go On5:32

12What A Feeling4:50

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Most interesting comment from YouTube:

Perry H.

Yep....Parents need to understand that they are not in control. I have a 15 yo daughter...and she is completely free to make her own choices without any punishment or consequences from me.

I have never told her to do anything, she does it if she wants to. Like...she hates cleaning...so I don't make her....I clean everything!

If we have a disagreement about something...we both sit down and talk about it. I never get angry or annoyed, I want to know what she has to say. And MOST times I side with her.

Whatever her choice is, IF I can fulfill that choice for her, I give it to her....its not my place to make choices for her!

All comments from YouTube:

Asha Jacob

3y↑41

If you'd like to uncover, process, and heal childhood wounds so that you can find your natural leadership and confidently express yourself, book a short call with me here to see if we'd be a good fit for working together: https://www.ashajacob.com/chatwithasha

Fenris-amatus Nc

My fogey is obsessed with junks, my mother doesn like but wouldn argue or dare to throw his stuff, plus she wld keep complaining abt how unhappy she is. Instead of seeking help she would just go to church, and Yes all the guilt tripping!

Veer Mehta

Can you do message one? I am a teen, should I apply?

PeachesCourage

2y↑1

My precious son died suddenly from stroke at 47 years old 2 years ago You are so right though Guilt is a feminine roll and I have been there so long and still feel it
I cannot feel the reality until I shake the guilty roll I was given all my life as a child
Which is the truth so you are correct here very much so guilt will take you down though and this world doesn't help too Guilt is ONLY fear of what happened and If I dwell there ISN"T healthy and certainly NOT responsible You know? Your what i needed and still do many thanks honest I'm only human like everyone else Not God This life doesn't allow death you know and well you feel your all the more responsible for something that wasn't my fault or my son's

Spooky Business

1y↑98

26 and can't wait to move out. They're trying to keep me here, but it won't hold much longer. I've been reading the comments here and I know we're all gonna make it, no matter what. Great video, really needed to hear it. Thank you so much. God bless you all.

Rita Gomes

How are they trying to keep you there?

Niecy Wake Ya Up

1y↑2

Same 26 and my eyes have opened even more to the emotional manipulation I’ve been dealing with these folks. I can’t wait for God to Bless Me Majorly, beyond my Wildest Imagination.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

What a lovely comment. The fact that you're looking up videos and trying to grasp the situation shows that you're on the pathway to healing and creating a life you love. Hugs.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

Lavanya, my heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Try initiating a gentle conversation with them. If it doesn't work out after a few times, you have to think of hard decisions to make to respect your own wants and needs in life. You don't want your entire life to be taken away by controlling parents.

Lavanya T

1y↑7

I’m 22 and I work a 9-6 job, my parents won’t let me hangout with any of my friends. They give me silent treatment all the time, try to make me stay at home whenever possible. Since they don’t like me hanging out, now they are planning for my marriage.

Countless days I’ve cried my heart out in the bathroom. I don’t want to hurt then with my words or actions or disrespect them in any way; however I cannot just take this anymore. It’s taking a troll on my mental health.

1 More Replies...

Sean Morrison

3y↑489

This is why I dislike the 'I live for my kids' parents because they never had a great life, mission or tasks before they had children. They'll want their children to be successful and take care of them.

Amaiya Kavachery

My life. My exact father.

Diana Kasongo

@Sam Tavoosian Meaning ?

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

@Tea LaRee Thank you for being a wonderful parent who respects their child's independence!

CovidFart

1y↑1

Sounds like jealousy

Amar Andrade

1y↑4

@Tea LaRee wow I wish I knew what it was like to have a parent so supportive and understanding, my mom would use phrases like "I am not your friend" "I am your parent" to validate behaviors that serve no one but their own ideologies. Thank you for existing, I'd say the hardest part is loving someone despite their lack of self- reflection and improvement which leads to toxicity because it is harder to have boundaries for your own well being with people who feel like you owe them something because I am their child...

6 More Replies...

T M.

2y↑268

This. I never asked to be born. My parents chose to bring me. If I had kids I would raise them my way but never dislike them for not turning out as the exact cookie cutter I favor. Kids are humans not copies of you.

Fenris-amatus Nc

Same i din ask to be born too, whenever my mother wants to argue she would say something rude, i know the trigger i say i know their shit. Then she wld just shut down, dun acknowledge. I hate that

INX -XSKULL

bro I wanna share one thing to u is I wish I would never born

Militica

2y↑2

Finally someone understands

Kosi Ejeckam

2y↑6

@R reyhan lemme shine it real quick before it touches his/her head lol. beautiful!

R reyhan

2y↑18

here, you dropped this 👑

Rls

3y↑138

My mother constantly told me that I wasn't appreciative enough.A lot of your ideas expressed here were really good and really insightful. You skillfully articulated a lot of this that is often difficult to express precisely in words.

Asha Jacob

Thank you so much, Ris!

1 More Replies...

Sara's space

2y↑110

I am 29 yo and I am physically sick because of this guilt trip and feeling of never being good enough...it's horrible, tiring and no matter what I do I am always the bad person ..

Phoenix Mount Studios

Just say no. Or I'm done. It's time like this you need to cut that chain and tell them you dont need them if they are not going to respect you.

Amber

You are not by yourself but keep doing things to make you happy and feel independent. The situation is temporary always remember that

Asha Jacob

1y↑3

Ugh, I'm so sorry you're going through this. Please maintain an emotional distance from them and find a good support network. Hugs.

Jungkook

2y↑7

some ppl dont change. address the problem kindly to her if she rejects wut she has been doing distance yourself from her if its affecting ur mental health. keep doing you you are doing great :)

1 More Replies...

Blitz Krieg

1y↑5

My elderly mother is a SAINT!!!!! She only gave true love. Never guilt. I love you mama. I love you so much for the rest of your life.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

That's so sweet ❤️

I likes what I likes

3y↑140

I'm trying my best not to be like my dad and the family. I'm always the mean one to them. I'm always the asshole to them. I'm always a problem to them. He always guilt trips me and it honestly makes me want to cry as a 25 year old man. I honestly just want to be left alone. I've never been the family oriented type. I'm never the favorite. I never seem to do anything right. I just want to move away and never come back.

Happy dad

1y↑1

@Shine baby shine amen to that

Shine baby shine

1y↑2

I totally understand, you sound like the black sheep of the family aka the one who noticed how toxic things were. They couldn't break you then and don't let them start now. Make a plan and move accordingly - find good roommates if need be, enroll in online courses to advance your education, put yourself first and make it happen for yourself. You can do it. ❤

MK

@I likes what I likes Dont mind the trolls...its awful and you deserve to be treated with respect...please heal and try to forget..God Bless You

r

1y↑3

@Asha Jacob I am about to run away. Yes to a new life and no more misery.

All my parents did to me is worthy of legal punishment but I can't even avail that.

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

@I likes what I likes I know this comment is way overdue but I am so incredibly proud of you! You're amazing and the resilience and introspection you've built for yourself is genuinely inspiring. Not to mention, the way you supported yourself in this comment thread is wonderful. I appreciate you.

19 More Replies...

Nemo

1y↑11

Many parents just genuinely resent seeing their children move out however, some keep quiet and deal with the sadness alone, that also triggers a sense of guilt in the child moving out if they are empathetic

Asha Jacob

1y↑4

Absolutely. Unhealthy reactions swing from resentment to self-pity and guilt. The latter can be especially hard to deal with, since we love our parents and want to be there for them. But they're neglecting the necessity of our independence. Oftentimes they're so much more capable than they realize, but have formed a dependence. Gradual, gentle steps of tough love works best here!

Jasper

3y↑68

this is incredible, more people need to hear and say this. i have so many friends whos parents guilt trip them, and its so horrible and toxic. this means so much keep up the good work <3

Emmanuel Tabe

2y↑53

i’m 16, my parents literally tried to guilt trip me because I didn’t call my mom after she was not home for hours at a time which they usually aren’t😭and my mom calls me a disappointment, they think I gaf💀manipulation at it’s finest

Asha Jacob

1y↑4

Ugh, they honestly have no idea what the impact of their words are. Glad you're letting it roll off your shoulders. Hugs.

Mr P

3y↑40

As a Christian and Asian , it is a culture that once a child finishes school it is now your turn to take care of of your parents even if they are still able to work. I have done this for 2 years but decided to stop after I got married and move to another country. I could tell my parents are not happy even if my brother took over this responsibility. Since I was a child , my parents tend to fight bout money and all I hear my mother say is Money. I feel guilty because they are my parents but I am so sick and tired of their treating their children like their slave or retirement fund. It is so bad that my dad had a mistress and had a kid and still expect help financially from us kids. Up to his dying breath , he still demands money from everyone. The sad part is I just want to live my remaining life in peace. I have terminal cancer.

Succulent Queen

1y↑1

My Asian friend's mother guilts her and tells her it is her dream for her (daughter) to buy a house so they (her parents) can move in.
I told her to tell her mother the truth... that it is her nightmare to buy a house and have her parents move in.

Succulent Queen

Listen, I've heard this culture stuff before. When your parent tells you (an adult child) that that's what your culture does...
Stand up for yourself and tell your parents... "This is America!" That's not how it is in America.
Tell them they have to take care of themselves financially like the rest of America and start saving up their own retirement fund. & They need to get their finances together.
Besides, when you move out of your parents house, they will be in a better financial position because there is one less mouth to feed. And if for some reason they can't make it without you... let them know in advance, so they can figure it out.

CJ

1y↑1

Oh gosh this brought tears in my eyes because I am North African and we have the same culture here. I'm in my middle tweenties and I don't think I am right or I would be right and healthy if I stay living with them. Too much accpectations, which means too much stress and pain and I have been stuggle with that since childhood basically. I already devoloped some health problems, my stomach and head and heart have started to weakend and that's scared. I wish you a long healthy life where you can reach your goals and dreams my friend.

Su W

❤️❤️❤️

Asha Jacob

I hope you're doing alright, placed some boundaries, and have been able to find happiness in your days. Hugs.

4 More Replies...

V M

2y↑59

I told my mom she only wants to have kids so that someone will take care of her when she's old. Now, my sister, whom she used to hate is forced to take her in because no one wants her because of her attitude.

She only wants to take your side if that person has money. She will only love you if you have money.

Leanna Mctier

How i feel

A N G E L

2y↑3

lolllll sound like my modda

Nyakhan Chap

1y↑6

I’m the oldest of 7 siblings and so much of the house work falls on me. I told my parents I want to move out and my mom cried and said she wouldn’t be able to manage if I left. I don’t want to live anymore. I will always be jealous of people who had parents who let them have lives, and I feel like my happiness doesn’t matter and that I’m just a caretaker. Your kids, your responsibility.

Asha Jacob

1y↑4

Gah, my heart hurts so much for you. You had your childhood ripped away just like that. And even now you're burdened with guilt that you never should have ever had. I know it's going to be so hard, but please, move out. It's going to feel like absolute hell at first, but I promise you'll soon come to realize it's the best decision you've ever made. It also shows your parents that they're more capable than they realize. You need to give them some tough love and show that they can be independent. Hugs.

Andrea Hernandez

3y↑46

I’m pretty sure more than half on my childhood traumas are a result of this. And, even if you really don’t want to, these are the kinds of relationships you keep attracting in the future. God, it’s hard.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

Very well put. If you're not careful it's so easily to find yourself around people who display the same unhealthy dynamics as those at home, since that's what familiar. It takes a lot of effort to be aware of this. I hope you're doing alright, Andrea. Hugs.

A Random Cat

1y↑6

My dad always pulls the “You owe me” whether it be love, affection, respect, physical belongings, etc.

I would ALMOST understand if I’d been an accident and he gave birth to me but… I’m adopted 💀

CJ

1y↑1

I can't be mad at adopting larebts but he shouldn't say that for sure. I wouldn't be surprise if an adopting parent get mad at a big ass misbehaving teenagers or adults but he can't use that against them. It would be better to just let you go than say that and waiting for something in return of his adoption.

A Random Cat

@Asha Jacob Thank you 💜 I really appreciate that

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

Ugh, what a pain. It's like a power-trip for them. I'm sorry you're dealing with that.

和樂HeLe

2y↑28

My mother would tell me how I'm wo ungrateful and could never get anything done on my own, while simultaneously pushing me away constantly from her personal space and making me feel how unwelcome I am.

A N G E L

my mom too shes fake af

zxth

Same I just fee trapped around my parents I can’t even move back with my sisters because it’s “bad” and “my sister can’t take care of me” even tho they are like my guardians they treat me better than my parents do and I have to stay at a school that I don’t like

Karinaboo13

2y↑4

Same here, I remember how much she didn’t like me helping her clean as a kid. It would always be annoying to her. Now she constantly talks about how I don’t ever help around the house or how I don’t treat the family well. She literally told me to go away every time I was around her. Luckily I found an apartment :)

Caffenation Overdose

2y↑49

Im always yelled at saying I owe them so much because they do things for me. I dont know what to do. They guilt trip me so much and I want to cry.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

I'm so sorry. Please understand that it's not healthy or acceptable behavior on their part. Hugs.

Jungkook

2y↑6

u can cry in the bathroom let it out... it helps

RubyStarlight

1y↑5

I’m about to send my mom a message about guilt tripping us, but I don’t know if it’ll get me in trouble but I want her to understand

Asha Jacob

1y↑3

I'm proud of you for initiating this! It's alright if it doesn't turn out well in the beginning. Keep trying, phrase your words in a neutral and non-accusatory way (this can be quite hard).

Praimet Jainaja

3y↑47

The bad thing is that I'm stuck with my parent due to covid19, so I was forced to stay home and not being able to put space between me and them

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

I hope you've been able to create some emotional detachment to protect yourself. Hugs.

samuri2011

2y↑10

You don't know how much good this video did for me .... My mom has cancer. And I'm so scared about loosing her. But she refuses to do some of the necessary healing in her journey. And she keeps guilt tripping us into feeling responsible for her decisions and being, as you said, an emotional dumping ground for her trauma... It's really fuqn me up and now I'm trying to heal this in me and my heart.

Simply. Patsy.

Stay strong

Phillips Juan

2y↑1

Same

star squad

3y↑12

Thank you for this video. My parents often cited other more grateful children to justify the guilt trips, and lately I've puzzled through the exact distinction you made. We came to the same conclusion, which is reassuring in itself, and you stated it clearly and concisely.

Thinking through the opposite dynamics between love and indebtedness regarding my own life spiraled around for hours til I was sick whenever I puzzled through it, so a clear explanation in 5 minutes makes a big difference.

Charmayne Joseph

3y↑9

Thank you for your to the point and informative commentary. This video has helped to console me after just now having an explosive exchange with my mom about my parenting choices and her imposing guilt on me for not doing things the way she would have me do them. I had to stand my ground and assert my boundaries and walk off and it didn’t feel good, it felt uncomfortable and shameful but it was necessary for my own self worth and mental stability

Trevor Olson

3y↑23

I like doing nice things for my parents but the guilt tripping bull when I’m close to 49 is not acceptable and I won’t heed them at all.

birdieculture

3y↑14

Absolutely agree.
Side note: I have a (ex)friend who I once said hi to, she asked if I have kids, I said no, and she immediately ignored me since.
I really think some parents really are so scared these days that their guilt tripping from previous generations won't work anymore, they immediately have to cut people who are non parents off their circles.

Mr. Sensual Education

1y↑1

As a parent of 2 now, my take of this is either your ex friend is drowning in their kids and they forgot to get back to you or assume because you don’t have kids you won’t want to be close with them. Until you have kids, you will never get it. No one without kids does. Don’t take it personally. The simplest things like waking up in the morning, brushing your teeth, getting in the car all takes 10x more effort with kids. I forget to get back to people, and if those people decide to take it personally, then I’ll forget about them too. Not grudge-fully, just because I got way too many other things going on to give a shit.

Jayla Tee

2y↑4

Currently going through this. I come from a low class family of poverty. It’s constantly “I paid all the bills and no one want to help me, I’m a single mom this,” yes I do want to give my mom money and pay rent” even since a young child that’s all I heard. I’m barley making ends meet myself I can’t even think about saving for college bc she wants money. I do plan on helping w rent as soon as I get this second job, I’ve been living check to check and cut down all my expenses so I can have more left over and start giver her money, it’s just to shut her up until I move out on my own. I feel like such a burden to her honestly. I constant have to hear “u don’t pay bills” as if I’m not trying to figure it out and increase my income. It definitely put a damper on our relationship but she won’t see it that way. She has nothing to offer her kids but wants help from them.

MJ Mori

1y↑1

It's not about whether i owe them or not. I want to see them happy, but it seems like i am the one who has to make plans to make sure they are enjoying their life. I feel guilty for spending time with myself when i see them getting stuck in similar routine for days and months. This guilt trio is draining me and i truly hate this feeling

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

I completely know how you feel. In these types of situations it's so important to strike a balance between taking care of them and giving them a bit of tough love to teach them how to be independent. Oftentimes they're so much more capable than they realize and it's on us to show them that. In a way, it's our turn to parent them :)

Amber

I needed this smh I’m 29 my dad keeps trying to have control over me but I am an adult . I enrolled myself into a new career I am working an in school working towards my degree. My time to shine. You Said That “They Chose To Have Us”, We don’t owe them anything! say it again!

Asha Jacob

Absolutely. When parents show decent respect and love towards their child, the child will always feel like they "owe" them everything. That's just natural love that is created from good parenting. Controlling and disrespectful parenting on the other hand...

Kim Storm

2y↑2

Thank you for making this video.
I now know that My guilt is rooted in the deep love I have for My mother ❤️

SoundWave

2y↑7

That's how I feel with my mum and step-dad. Yesterday I was domesticly violenced by my step-dad and it happened before and my mum has sugar coated his actions for so long now and now I don't feel safe around from my own parents anymore. I'm having mixed emotions of what to do and I need advice.

Cylas Walker

Sometimes you just have to look at the bright sides get strong to defend and one day you might get what u want just keep being strong

Billliona

Thank you for creating this video!
This topic should be more talked about so that those guilt-tripping parents learn from their actions and do what's right...
and I hope the young parents who are watching this would be aware of it

Nxth

1y↑1

My parents love to guilt trip me and I told them this once and they just laughed at me and got back to guilt tripping

Brianne Bush

I really needed to hear this because for years I had a parent borrowing money from me. They downplay that I have helped them and act like the money I chose to give wasn't enough. I had to set boundaries this year especially because my goals are behind due to their financial irresponsibility.

Lilly Yana

3y↑24

My mum will curse me if I dont do what she wants me to do.

Joseph Stalin

2y↑5

Gtfo of that house and get away from them that’s some some advice I can give u

1 More Replies...

Chai H

2y↑4

My mom is the sweetest human being, she is so caring and cares for animals ect.
However; so many things didn’t add up growing up in the way she was always expecting me to worship her goodness and what a wonderful person she is and the sacrifices she made to offer me the life she did. As I grew up and went to live on my own whenever I was visiting her (because she lives in another city) she will love bomb me with cleaning and taking care of me, when all I asked for is to have a normal relationship with her with laughter and NOT so much effort from her side. Because mind you whatever she does for me (cleaning cooking even making a cup of tea) she will have to explain me in details all the lengths and effort she went through to do it, and I was kind of over it, because I didn’t asked for these things and I could take care perfectly fine for myself. Years went by and I took care of her financially spoiled her in any way possible to see that it wasn’t enough and she always wanted more from me especially emotionally which kind of set me off and made me distanced from her especially on the emotional side.

Now she is visiting me and my husband in a different country. All she does is cleaning and “taking care “ of us and she went into great length to clean my bedroom, and I felt as of my privacy was violated and told her to please enjoy her time and not have to do that much because it was really unnecessary and made me and my husband feel a bit uneasy.
Ofcourse she was hurt and wanted to guilt trip me with her “goodness” and took it to such extend by making a sad lie and involving other’s (her sister) into it that she has to go back to her country and if I could book her ticket ASAP. I confronted her gently with the fact that her excuus wasn’t true and asked if she really wanted to go that fast because the tickets now are so expensive but they will be less in 10 days from now, which she replied I can give you my golden bracelet (that I gifted her when she arrived here) to sell and by her the ticket, I told her to keep her bracelet and that the message was well received and bought her the ticket and she is leaving in 2 days.

Despite the fact that it feels like such smack in the face the way she is playing the victim role and wanting to end her trip on such a sad note I feel relieved by finally understanding the dynamics of this relationship. Because I always felt guilty on why I couldn’t feel her genuine love when at the surface she is doing all the right things!

Cloud831

Thank you for this video...I so needed to hear your words at this point in my life💞

Aljaž Kolar

2y↑3

I think i actually knew i was guilt tripped very early in childhood and i even got resentful toward my parents for it but after i would get humiliated, punished even beat so i had to learn to conform. I didn't know just how far can i be punished for resenting, maybe next time i'll just be left to starve and as a helpless child i did only thing i could i gave in to guilt trip. When got guilt tripped later as financially stable adult they were so suprised their eyes were popping out. They thought they "won" using guilt trips when in reality i felt literally choked for two decades.

Ruth Nk

3y↑11

Great video, Looking forward to that next video on controlling parents!

GrumpyBoomer

1y↑4

First part of life is destroyed by parents, second by kids. 😆😆😆

Gforu81

1y↑1

Omg hilarious

Jmarie ._.903

2y↑1

I graduated highschool just recently and was gonna go down to NM for college reasons and my mom basically begged me not to go and I felt guilty and I didn't go. I honestly really regret not going, I've been really depressed staying with my mom.

Militica

2y↑2

Thank you. i was born unplanned i guess i have never had my own room because my parents don’t really care, atleast I don’t think so but 3 days ago I asked my mother if I would ever get a room and then she started guilt tripping me and i honestly got so sad because I feel like she didn’t want me. I still feel that way.

maijab

Me too. I was a "mistake". Emotional blackmail is a tool well-used.

Leah Kabea

2y↑1

I really resinate with your content. Did you ever make a video about the side case parents who are controlling?

Olga Amir

2y↑7

Guilt tripping favorite horse of my mom😂 She start from very beginning, from moment I was born, I already owe her so much 😱

Jungkook

lmao😂🤦🏻‍♀️

Michael De santa

2y↑5

I followed my parents blindly now I am a failure and they say I am responsible for it because I never listened to them

Rick M

1y↑1

You are spot on. Thank you!

Jevon Tommy

I might not owe my parents anything for giving the basic necessities but I for one am so dang grateful to them for just loving me so much. Especially my mom. Wouldn't replace them for the highest rewards in existence and beyond. Parents need us kids to give back to them, not because we owe it to them exactly but rather it is an honour and a huge privilege to see them have an easy life after working so hard to keep me stable. I regret nothing concerning them , only that I wish I was born in a better era. Love you Ma and Dad !!! 🤗🤗🤗🤗

Asha Jacob

Yes exactly!!! Loving and respectful parenting naturally leads to a child wanting to give everything and more back to their parents. But it should never come from a place of a parent guilt tripping and letting the child know that they "owe" them. So happy to know your parents are filled with love and respect for you.

1118moonlight

2y↑1

Thank you for your wisdom during such a changing world

Gabriela Dey

My mother is like that. She always wants me to help her financially, meanwhile she refuses to get a job. She refuses to seek help for her emotional issues. Ive done more than enough for her for the past 12 years and I’ve finally set my limits with her.

Asha Jacob

So happy you're finally setting boundaries, Gabriela! With some tough love, she'll recognize she's more capable than she gives herself credit for. You've taken steps to look out for the both of you.

Rick Soriano

2y↑2

My Mom was sick last Wednesday when I went to her house. I usually go to her house on Wednesday's to put out her garbage, she's 80. Thursday I texted her to see how she was. She said she was much better. I didn't talk to her until Sunday when I happened to be in her neighborhood and stopped in. She was visibly annoyed. I said, what's the matter? She said, I'm sick and nobody called me, not you or anyone from your family. So I lost it because, a) she said she was better Thursday and b) because, like I told her, it's the same old s*it, nobody loves me, nobody appreciates me, you didn't call me (according to her I'm supposed to call her because she's older). Anyway, it still bothers me this week although, typing this makes me feel a little better, haha. If there's any good to come of her episodes over the last few decades, I don't in any way, shape or form behave that way to my kids. Anything they do, or don't do, if fine. It's better than creating bad memories/episodes and we have a wonderful relationship, we have a nice family, my wife, and three daughters but I always feel bad about not being in contact with my mom but once a week. I'm really not a contact type person either, I'm the one who you text and say, "you alive". My wife's mom is totally different in this way.

benzo_vamp

2y↑1

Thank you seriously. I feel like I was going insane . I’m glad I’m im normal

Kambria

Wow, I needed to see this. Thank you so much for this video.

David Goman

3y↑1

Wow. This video was Godsent if you ask me. Thank you, Coach Asha! To God be the glory!

Donna Daniels

2y↑2

Thank you for this video confirmation🎯 I always said I do not oh my narcissistic mother nothing, I have moved on , No scapegoating here 🐐 I remove myself from the dynamic because I want to see now they're going to be responsible for all their own🐂 it's funny I never show no type of love to my narcissistic mother🤣 supper empath HEYOKA Bulletproof 💪

skalawitz

1y↑1

I'm almost 40 and my parents are like this when I was in my youth. I had a very miserable childhood. And now I have a 4yo, Iwill make sure I will never repeat the same mistake they made.

Asha Jacob

Thank you for being introspective and being a wonderful, thoughtful parent.

Amanda

3y↑130

I stood up to my mom today and feel really bad. I yelled and than she guilt tripped me and like usual the guilt trip worked.

All she wants is to hang out together but I don’t like socializing anymore.

I used to end up getting slapped across the face, called names like bitch, loser, or slut. Now that has stopped I still remember and prefer isolating. No more getting getting bossed around, called down, manipulated, and devalued. I study 24/7 and just give people free answers it seems. They want to hang out for emotional sympathy and answers about why things happen. No more helping. I can’t without feeling used.

A N G E L

2y↑1

omgg this is my life atm! you go girl some people toooooo toxic its sad sometimes its the ones we love most

Gypsy Aspen

Remember they have a right is a human being to be disappointed or proud of how things turned out. But they are responsible

Charly Dat Duc Lai

2y↑2

Never feel bad for standing up for yourself, but you shouldn’t yell either. You need to speak to your mom and tell her how you feel, and if she doesn’t want to listen, set up the consequences and be really serious about them.

5 More Replies...

Simply. Patsy.

Thank you so much for this video, I appreciate you! 🙂👍

DiligentBoy 7

2y↑3

My mother always guilt trips me by dumping her failures as a parent onto me by making me feel guilty for moving out and not thinking of my siblings when my mental health comes first . It is not my job to raise her kids , I’m still growing myslef

carlaK

1y↑1

My mum guilted me because she’s a narcissist… it is crazy hard to not be there for her with alzheimers. But she has sucked so much out of me, I need to stay away, it exhausts me even imagining planning to be near her. even just the memory of it crushes me. I recommend you list qualifications when posting these kinds of videos.

NarcatasCor

2y↑1

That is EXACTLY how my mother spoke to me. Always guilt tripping me that I dont love her and now my sister has borderline and I think my mother doesnt even get that it is most probably mainly because of her.

NarcatasCor

@Asha Jacob Thank you. Kind of I guess

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

Almost always they don't realize how toxic they're being. They're just reacting to their own trauma. It's important for you to prioritize your mental health first. I hope you and your sister are doing alright.

Jade Blackwell

1y↑3

Parents do ZERO planning before the child is born. Like picking a good partner to raise kids with, being financially stable,being educated,being emotionally and physically healthy enough to raise a child…. And than blame the child for all the struggle they had to go through while raising them as if it is the child’s fault! 😂

Gforu81

1y↑1

So true

Lulu Interrupted

3y↑1

My Mom wasn't around much. I was taken away from her when I was 12. I missed her so much and remember crying myself to sleep at night every night wishing she was with me. She came back into my life when I was 17 I believe. It's been a good and bad experience. But now she constantly tells me everything I've done and do wrong. She blames me for how bad her life is. She makes me feel like I'm a mistake. I'm not even being dramatic, I feel like I'm nothing. I'm the problem. She says im horrible to her and treat her bad when I don't. I try so hard to just make her happy when she is around but all I really feel is that she hates me. She resents me and I don't know why or what I've done to her. I'm 33 and a mother now and I can't imagine making my little girl feel this way. It hurts so much to even imagine her hurting like this because me. How could a mother do that? I don't know what to do anymore.

Jenny

She sounds jealous of you

x-mess

2y↑26

Honor your father and mother to have long life. It doesn't mean "like, love, agree with". It just means respect. Learning to respect them will teach you to respect others. Sometimes, in order to remain respectful, you need to remove yourself from the situation. Never lower yourself to the level of disrespect.

Asunset

Great point!❤ I've been seeing that as well

SoulAudacity

2y↑2

🎯🎯🎯

Z Moses

2y↑20

If parents want respect from their children, they need to model it by respecting the latter. It's a two way street.

Eduardo Villanueva

Very helpful video , is there an email I can reach out to for further questions ?

howdoyoucomeupwithusernames😔😱

2y↑2

My mum fr accused me of purposefully trying to scare her when she barged into the toilet while I was in there and then proceeded to say "I'm not thin anymore, I could've had a heart attack! I CAN DIE (NAME)!!!!" and then I immediatly get defensive because wtf did I do wrong?? And then she screams at me saying "YOU DONT CARE!!!" my brother also stood up for but wtf, she always targets me because I don't listen to whatever she says

Mel Lo

My Mother would tell me that she wishes she would hit me. She did. A lot when I was a child. I've experienced being their emotional dumping ground and other problems.

sprooced

My mother had an affair, went into different troubles, and would always find someone to carry the guilt for her who usually happens to be me. I didn't like her parenting style but I was afraid of what the bible says so I tried so hard to be a good daughter. For years, I made sure to help her financially and emotionally. Whenever problems arise, she would always have someone to blame. ME. The last straw for me was when she told me not to set foot at our house until she dies. By the way, growing up, she was good at telling me I'm a demon, and I can still remember how her slaps hurt (especially that she does it in front of people). It took me decades to realize that I do not deserve everything she did to me and made me feel. My father, I thought, was the only family I had left. He would sometimes take short vacations at my house. I made sure he feels appreciated until he did something unimaginable. What infuriates me most, is how they both seem to not understand why I react the way I do. Are they blind not to see how bad they can be? Whenever they would do something (sometimes, really psychology disturbing), they seem to not understand why I get upset. I stopped talking to my mother and sister 7 years ago when they plotted things to harm my father. And I just stopped talking to my father recently because of that obscene thing he did at my home. But why in the effing world do I feel guilty thinking that they are old already and they don't have much time left? My father told me he can't imagine life if I get mad at him and avoid him like I did to my mother and sister. That makes me feel like he is torturing me mentally to feel guilty and still keep in touch with him despite what he did. I am so mad at my life. I am so mad that I had to bear the kind of parents that I have. I am so mad that I have a sister but I can't even count on her. I've been there for her but whenever our parents would cause another problem, she gets selfish. She would only care about herself. I asked her for help when our father needed it the most because I can't do it myself. She refused to help me and so I did it by myself which broke me. I am so broken. I need this guilt to go away because it's never mine to begin with.

Nisha Vasudevan

1y↑1

My parents are both narcissistic and i don't feel like spending time with them at all..they were never emotionally supportive and trying to emotionally control even though i am an adult with my own kid now

Asha Jacob

I'm so sorry, Nisha. I hope you've created strong boundaries and give yourself space to grieve the parents you needed, but never had.

Katnipkitkat (Cthülhu Kthûl'hu)

2y↑6

I don't even want to be here at all. Just becoming a parent is so incredibly selfish.

Bottoms Up Barmaid

I tell my children all the time that I am go grateful I get to take care of them and cook for them and do what I can to make them happy and healthy and loved. They already now as children say that they plan to care for us when they grow up. It’s so sweet, I don’t expect it but only hope that they want to have me in their life and their children’s lives so I can love them in the same way too.

Asha Jacob

Exactly! If you parent with love and respect, your children will naturally want to go above and beyond to take care of you as well. Guilt tripping is just a symptom of ineffective parenting.

Gforu81

I needed this!

LilacThePlant

2y↑1

Honestly atp guilt-tripping parents are just desperate to feel or look like they're good parents smh

cave man

I’m living with my wife and daughter in my own place. Spend pretty much most of my time with them and maybe see my mother once or twice a week for an hour or so. Recently my mother became very upset with me saying that I don’t spend enough time with her and same thing with my wife and my daughter. It makes me feel really bad to hear that from her. I told her that I want to try to make more of an effort to see her more often. After that she started pointing out all the things I did wrong to show I didn’t care about seeing her. What do I do? My mother has been an awesome one. I feel like I owe her that. At the same time I’m tired, and most of the time I just want to be alone or go do something else with my daughter and wife. I feel really bad. Any advice anybody?

Belle's Hairstyles

1y↑3

I just moved 2,000 away from my parents, and she sends me messages all the times saying "have you thought about this lifestyle you're living, I won't see you unless you come back to live here, you're with a scum bag" etc I don't answer and then she gets mad I don't answer her

Belle's Hairstyles

@Gforu81 I hope your family begins to be more understanding than my own

Gforu81

I moved away from my elderly mother. The whole family is pissed at me.

- Rin 1.O -

2y↑1

Off topic, but it took me a “million” times to realize that you have a mic right beside you 💀 Btw, I love your voice, it’s very calming and soothing :)

William The Creative

This is great content

Chain

2y↑1

I miss one thing in dishes, apparently I did nothing and they’ve asked many times, they’ve asked once, now I’m known to be the kid who plays video games and doesn’t help around the house. It’s just unfair

Moon Shine

Totally agree. My parents never tell me that I owe them or anything of that sort and I love them. They always support me and truly wish for my happiness. They really have sacrificed so much for me!

Sailor Popoy

Help, im feeling all you said right now 😢

Perry H.

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

Thank you for being a wonderful parent who respects their child, Perry.

Ash

Thanks dude this helped me a lot

David Arriaga

3y↑1

“Ok David, again we have to work hard to put a couple thousand dollars back into our account that was used to help someone who relentlessly tells us how much more we should, could , didn’t do for them . An adult wouldn’t even be having this conversation with their parent. Who the hell talks to their parents this way” my mother when it came to brow beating me in regards to not being able to get my life together in timely matter, after a pandemic, death of a friend, and getting thrown out and in a unfavorable living situation. The toxicity of “owe me” from parents makes me glad I’m gay and never ever want to have children. I see this as almost secret resentment because they had me young and Feel I owe them their damaged brand or “respect” when I do and have done the things they asked, I just am not submissive.

Mel Lo

1y↑1

My parents have guilt-tripped me into taking care of them because I owe them for being born. I'm struggling with the guilt-tripping and their physical and emotional abuse. My parents are also not fluent in English and I struggle with my Father sexualizing me and my Mother diminishing me. I wish I was not born into this family.

Asha Jacob

I'm so sorry you're going through this, Mel. I hope you can create some boundaries and find space to heal.

Chaleika Cyrus-Edwards

1y↑1

Hi my name is Chaleika & I am 22 but going on 23 like pretty much almost like in the next five months right until now which is actually going to be on the 9th of August. And plus I do feel like that I am constantly very ridiculous getting tased & even criticized my mom just literally because. She does not allow me to have my own privacy or by allowing to make messes & by making any mistakes 🤕 😭 💔 without being criticized, judged & even having to feel guilty either too. My mom would not allow me to go outside for a sleepover at a friend's house too as well. For how I would react when it comes to those most difficult types of situations, I would either get laughed at or even judged about the whole fact like that involves of getting told that I do walk very weird in a very negative way & plus most of the times I mostly do not like going out to the store with my mom that often just literally because she has once teased me once about the whole fact like that involves of getting some baby supplies that I do specifically purchase for my self while I am at the store sometimes. I do still get treated like a piece of crap for that too. And plus my mom would most likely treat my two siblings a lot nicer than me & plus I was born with "high" functioning autism in real life. I am actually the middle born child who is actually a full grown adult. And plus I was not allowed to express my emotions in a very healthy way for what on every single human being is actually supposed to do indeed. I do do take a bit of some time to limit my self to gain some freedom & as by making mistakes too like in the long term. And I do limit of being my true self from showing any type of emotions that are not linked of the joy of happiness. Thank you very much for sharing this amazing comment & very well said my friend. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

Mun Strum

3y↑3

PLEASE KEEP MAKING THESE VIDEOS

NorthStar371

2y↑3

My mom would threaten suicide so often, my sister and my reaction would be, here we go again, mom’s threatening kill herself again.

Fucked me up to this day. How do I overcome this?

Persephone P.

2y↑1

Run..save yourself

1 More Replies...

Alex Sanchez

For some reason everyone seems to have the answer for everything sometimes we ignore that a lot of times when such person have a particular profession is because most likely they went through it, is that true?. another thing we always seem to be looking for reasons on why our children do things there's always a reason To defend a child who never wants to follow House Rules responsibilities responsibilities well there are times when they do grow up when they turn 18 when they believe that they already adult, They accumulate huge amount of issues and problems when we from the beginning tried the beginning try to educate them on those of course no one can stop what the future might bring to us so they accumulate enormous amount of issues and guess what they come back to their parents expecting that their parents should Solved the problems that we in the beginning had a bison on to be careful when we as parent decide that we're not going to help because the past issues in the past ways that they behave when they were under our custody then they applied this guilt Tripping that That you are saying what you are my parents why you are not helping me you are my parents why you are not taking care of my kids you are my parents why are you helping me financially when I'm down. What I think what is happening based on my experience and everything that I have said is based on my personal experience it's that when we try to discipline our children when we are trying to educate our children every professional person steps in the government steps in and you no longer can say just about nothing to a child so a childhood does not have any kind of knowledge any kind of experience starts to make decisions for themselves and every decision that they most likely make is totally wrong and every time they make a wrong decision guess who's gonna have to solve those issues guess who's gonna have to pay for those issues guess who's gonna have to sacrifice for those issues We the parent why because we always have a professional person who's always Going to be on the side or those who are quiet them you're dumb thank you

Ross Ross

Can anyone help? My parents split when I was a baby due to my dads cheating. I grew up with my mum seeing my dad at weekends. I never formed much of a bond with my dad, I always felt awkward around him and didn’t want to spend time with him. This drove him nuts and he would often shout at me and also guilt trip me to try and get me to like him more. As I got older I felt like my dad had been a villain in my life and for all my teenage years and twenties I treated him as someone who I saw as worthless who I despised and the cause of much of my personal problems. I know this did significant damage to him and caused him much distress but I always thought he deserved it because the root cause of it all was him cheating on my mum and that’s why we didn’t have a nice family life. Now that I’m older (40s) I want to be finally over this. I still feel very hurt by lots of things he did (which he has never apologised for or shown any sense of accountability) but I’m not sure how much responsibility lies with me. I feel guilty for causing him pain but I still resent him for what he’s done and feel like he should have taken more responsibility and understood that he caused the whole thing in the first place. Can anyone relate to this or offer any advice on how I should feel? (Thanks for reading, I know this was loooooong!)

Asha Jacob

Ross, it looks like you've been holding a lot of resentment (understandably) and you've realized that it's too heavy of an emotion to carry for all these years. Resentment is a perfectly normal feeling to have when you are initially faced with a trauma, but it's easy to get stuck in it if there's not much support or guidance. The problem with resentment is that, if held too long, it keeps you focused on pain instead of growth.

I'm glad you've now come to realize that you need growth in regards to this situation - some people never realize that at all. In terms of where the responsibility lies, it's subjective and for you to decide on. However, you can't figure that out until you have a real, deep discussion with your dad. Someone needs to take control of the situation to make this happen, and that has to be you, since your dad never initiated it.

Write down a list of things you'd want to ask your dad, things about how you feel that you want to let him know, and what you hope to achieve in the relationship between the both of you. Make sure to phrase it in a non-defensive, accusatory way. I know it's hard, given that him cheating is the main focal point, but phrasing your questions and feelings in a neutral way allows for him to give you a well thought out response. Otherwise he'll just be giving you defensive responses that don't bring the conversation anywhere.

Regardless of how the conversation goes, I hope you find some inner peace from respecting your feelings and putting in the effort to confront a tough relationship that means a lot to you. Hugs.

KRISH Z4324

I am the one with the hooks in myself 😭

Phoenixz :D

2y↑1

Can I just say something.
Mother’s are honestly more aware about how they chose you get you so they’re more smarter then the average father.

Joseph Stalin

CAP where did u hear this

silence

My parents are more or less like what she said I just hope that one day I can be free😔

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

I hope you can set some boundaries and take care of yourself. Hugs.

Salaar Akbar

Anyone "blaming" parents for bringing you into this world is nothing but depressed with his own life and wants to point the blame at someone. Nothing more. Yeah parents make mistakes and sometimes it has lasting effects, but you learn from it and make sure you don't pass that on to your kids and believe me you'll make mistakes too no matter how much you try to avoid. That's how it is and that's how it should be. Get your life on track and see your relationship with your parents heal if you're willing to let it.

Salaar Akbar

1y↑3

@Asha Jacob look I understand that there are parents who are terrible to their kids. And certainly if it goes too far they ought to be held accountable too. But arguments like "we don't owe them anything" or "we didn't ask to be born" are unacceptable. And under no circumstances justifiable. Hold them accountable for real and intentional wrong doings, not mistakes that every human makes. For the most part every kid owes their parents their lives.

Asha Jacob

1y↑2

Salaar, I know it can be hard to grasp the severity of manipulation and abuse that can come from parents. Take a look at the comments of my videos, most are from people who go above and beyond for their parents. They end up neglecting their own needs and life from taking care of their parents, or tolerating toxicity. Some are choosing to initiate a conversation with their parents to create a healthy relationship with them, some realize it's not possible. Recognize we're not here to vilify our parents, we're here to hold them accountable and learn how to heal. You must be thinking of toxic children who are ungrateful. That is not the target audience if this video.

Kalpana deswal

2y↑3

Do you have grown children ? I have two 40 and 37 and I have a good relationship with them and we try to be as organic as possible . It's perfectly normal for a parent to teach/ expect a child to respect the parent and value a parent.and also a parent has to respect the children . Expectations have to be handled with care and maturity .
So did I understand you right when I hear you say that children owe nothing to their patent because they never asked to be born ? Wow ! it's perfectly normal for a child to be grateful and for a parent to expect respect and support when needed . And also be a good role model displaying the same towards their parents ( grandparents ) and it's not as though we will not have issues ...every problem.can be sorted unless there is addiction violence in the family . There is plenty of support available . And if it's too bad it's okay to stay away till he issues are sorted ..under reasonable circumstances any strife can be sorted . You cannot advocate arrogance and indifference ... Your advise is only going to bring long time damage to your clients or advise seekers . There are exceptions on both sides .

L A

Children do things for parents because they WANT to because the parents are loving and respectful. It should be a natural thing that happens which parents do not feel entitled to in a narcissistic way. This video is talking about parents who are unloving and disrespectful and still EXPECT their children to do for them even though they were terrible parents. There is a big difference

Kalpana deswal

2y↑1

@Asha Jacob I hear you Asha ..and definitely some of the explanation makes sense ...BUT a vedio like this can be misleading . .and most of the times this type of general advise can be misused by the human mind which is designed to manipulate go suit its own agenda .. .so every case is different ....it's better you post vedios of your one to one case studies....

Asha Jacob

2y↑5

Hi Kalpana, I completely understand what you're saying. I agree, It's absolutely normal and wonderful when children are grateful and respectful towards their parents so long as their parents respect them. However, this video is targeted towards those who struggle with parents who do not respect them and use guilt tripping as a tool to get their own needs met. These are the people I work with - those who have the unfortunate reality of having parents who emotionally abuse them and who look down on them. The reality is that it's far more common than you think. Take a look a some of the comments in this video. In situations like these, it's important to recognize when you're gaslighted, and when your needs as a child are not being met.

Very often, for their own mental health, these people will need to cut contact or go low contact with their parents. Worst off, there's often little to no support available. It can be quite hard to grasp the severity of such relationships. Of course, with parents who love and respect their children, this video wouldn't be relevant. However, this video exists for those who are caught in those unreasonable situations with unhealthy parents. There's barely any voice for them as all they're told is to tolerate abuse and neglect since it's their parents after all.

Kalpana deswal

Gosh type errors ..as long you get the drift ....lots of love to all .

Stevy Sass

I go through this stuff everyday!!!!. My mom would tell me to leave! Or say i have no use, because i didnt want to do a chore tht way she wants it or do something that i didnt even of thing

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

My god. When a parent gets upset and tells their kid to leave... it's just so painful. It immediately breaks the concept of "home". I'm so sorry you've been treated like that by someone who's supposed to make you feel loved unconditionally. Hugs.

Fionn Maguire O’Loughlin

2y↑6

This is not always the case. Guilt tripping parents can also be a result of Parents who feel owed something by their child due to the effort they have put in

L A

If you have a mentality this selfish you do not need to have kids. If you chose to have them then expect to sacrifice with nothing in return. I don't know why parents have this narcissistic viewpoint that because they take care of their kids, children HAVE to do for them. That is literally the bare minimum you are SUPPOSED to do as a parent.

A N G E L

left my mom today because she doesnt respect me she made me lose my job at a real estate company while owning her own. Before i had the job she told me get my own experience lol our trust just went down the sht hole

FormerFundie NowFree

There are plenty of kids out there that think their parents are an ATM, are allergic to work and remain self-centered and infantile well beyond when they should be. Videos like this enable everyone to now have a victim mentality and casually throw around the word narcissist.

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

There are definitely toxic children out there. My videos aren't made for them. Have a look at all the comments in my videos. Most are struggling with toxic environments and are giving up everything for their parents. In fact, if a toxic child stumbles upon my video and sees the comments, they'd realize they're not who I'm referring to in my videos.

FormerFundie NowFree

1y↑1

What happened to honor your father and mother? It doesn't have a qualifier such as them being the perfect parents

Sara Croft

This is really good video. I don't know why has so little likes.

Asha Jacob

Aw thank you! And it's because I'm absolutely terrible at posting regularly hahaha (Fixing that soon!)

Garima Bhandari

I think you are thankless. Parents are selfless and should be appreciated for what they do. I agree there are toxic parents out there but you cannot outweigh the sacrifices parents make for their kids. Yes bringing a child on this earth is a parent's choice, but they constantly make choices and difficult decisions to make a better future for their kids. I am not sure if you have kids but you will understand it if you happen to be a parent yourself.

Asha Jacob

1y↑1

Garima, I understand where you're coming from. There are many wonderful parents who do their best, who love and respect their child. These are not the parents I'm referring to in this video. Take a look at the comments in this video. Many people are sharing their experiences growing up with toxic, manipulative parents who disregard their wellbeing, despite trying to please them at the expense of their mental health. I work with many clients who come from emotionally abusive situations. This video is for them - to validate their experience.

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