Footprints
Half Man Half Biscuit Lyrics


Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴  Line by Line Meaning ↴

Ethereal requiem mausoleum …Bert Royal
Harlequin tourniquet matricide …Adge Cutler
Earlier shepherds came and talked about …The Shend
Concubine mortuary Daktari wallpaper

One night, a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonged to him, and the other to the Lord. When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand, and he noticed that many times along the path of his life, there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times of his life. This really bothered him, and he questioned the Lord about it: "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you would walk with me all the way. Yet I have noticed during the most troublesome times of my life, there's only one set of footprints. I don't understand why, when I needed you most, you would leave me."

The Lord replied: "My precious precious child, I love you, and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, that must have been when I was appearing on…
Junior Kickstart…
Junior Kickstart…"

The teenager awoke at mid day. He walked into the back garden. Everything was peaceful except for the complaining note of the woodcrest dying in the leafy thickness. He walked up to the patio chair where his father sat.
"Father?"




"Yes son?"
"I want to borrow your golf clubs."

Overall Meaning

The lyrics of the Half Man Half Biscuit's song Footprints are a surreal assemblage of seemingly unrelated phrases, which in reality follow a logical pattern of association. The band creates a collage of words that evoke a sense of mortality, with references to funerals, mausoleums, and mortuaries. The first verse mentions names of deceased celebrities: Bert Royal, a British comedian who died in 1971, and Adge Cutler, a musician and founder of a British country-rock band who died in 1974. The second verse makes a reference to the shepherd in the biblical parable of the lost sheep, who symbolizes Jesus Christ's mission to save the lost souls. However, in the song, the shepherd is represented by The Shend, the lead singer of the alternative rock band The Cravats. Finally, the last verse adds another layer of weirdness to the song through the juxtaposition of "concubine" and "Daktari wallpaper" (Daktari was an American TV series set in an animal reserve in East Africa in the 60s).


The last lines of the song, "Junior Kickstart," appear to be disjointed from the rest of the song. However, they bring a surprising twist to the song's interpretation. The lyrics quote the opening lines of a British TV show for children titled Junior Kickstart, which aired from 1979 to 1988. The show featured young motorcycle riders competing in stunt performances. The lyrics implicitly suggest that the singer of the dream sequence, who is worried about the one set of footprints in his life, is not alone at all, but in the company of someone who has a "wild side." Hence, the single set of prints during his darkest moments belongs not to the Lord, but to the "Junior Kickstart" figure, an antihero who guides him through the difficult moments of his life.


Line by Line Meaning

Ethereal requiem mausoleum …Bert Royal
Bert Royal's funeral was beautiful and ghostly


Harlequin tourniquet matricide …Adge Cutler
Adge Cutler is a fool for wanting to kill his mother and his crazy plan will fail


Earlier shepherds came and talked about …The Shend
The Shend has a mysterious and intriguing reputation, talked about by many before


Concubine mortuary Daktari wallpaper
The wallpaper at the mortuary looks like it belongs in a tent for keeping concubines and is reminiscent of a TV show about a vet in Africa


Junior Kickstart…
This is where the Lord was during the troubled times in the man's life


The teenager awoke at mid day.
The beginning of a new day


He walked into the back garden.
The teenager went outside


Everything was peaceful except for the complaining note of the woodcrest dying in the leafy thickness.
The only sound was the unpleasant noise of a dying bird


He walked up to the patio chair where his father sat.
Approaching his father sitting outside


"Father?"
Direct quote of what the teenager said to his father


"Yes son?"
Direct quote of the father's response


"I want to borrow your golf clubs."
Direct quote of the teenager's request




Contributed by Elena E. Suggest a correction in the comments below.
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Comments from YouTube:

@jasonmarshall9941

"Includes one of the funniest lines in the history of popular music". Stuart Maconie, BBC 6Music 2/5/2020. JUNIOR KICK START!!!

@roberttrombetta6566

This is great stuff, and one of the best and most apt title and cover photo combinations ever.

@Cavitation68

They’ve only gone and done it…..again !
😂
Homage to VU - Lady Godivas Operation…

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