Mama
Jessica Lyrics

I don't know if you know this, so I have four kids.
I have four children.

I am I do I have four kids, I have two baby mamas.
I have four kids with two different mothers.

I'm like a rapper. I'm like a Jewish rapper. I'm a japper.
I have a lot of kids and multiple baby mamas like some rappers do.

And I didn't have any of them because I didn't want to ruin this temple.
I didn't have kids before because I wanted to protect my body.

So I have a 13 year old with my ex and I have three I have three young kids at home.
I have a teenager from a previous relationship and three young children living with me currently.

I've a four year old and twin eight month olds. Can you fucking believe this?
I have a four-year-old and twin eight-month-olds, which is a lot.

I know it's a lot. It's a lot for a very selfish person. And I never wanted kids.
I recognize that having kids is a lot of responsibility, and I never really wanted them.

I'm being honest like that sounds horrible.
I'm being honest about how challenging it can be to be a parent.

I was never the one to walk in and be like, where are the kids? I want to sit and play with the kids.
I was never really interested in babysitting or playing with kids.

You know, it's a lot. Because they're honest. You know, they'll just yell out your fat, your hairs frizzy go make some money bitch. You know, I mean.
Kids can be brutally honest and say hurtful things like 'you're fat' or 'go make money' without thinking about how it affects others.

And it's a lot. It really is. And the crying all day. Ahh ahh
It can be overwhelming to deal with crying and tantrums from kids all day.

It's it's I have such anxiety. I'm, my daughter, keeps whining, my four year old Isabella.
Parenting can cause anxiety, especially when dealing with a whining child like my daughter.

It's I try to be patient because of what I went through. So I don't want to redo the things, I know some of you relate to this.
I try to be patient with my daughter because I don't want to repeat the mistakes my parents made with me, and I know others can relate.

I don't want to keep the pattern going. So I try to talk myself out of it when she's like.
I'm trying to break the cycle of negative behavior by not repeating it with my own kids.

This was yesterday. I want pizza for lunch, I want pizza. So the whole time I'm like, don't yell at her, don't yell, you were yelled at and it made you fat, Don't, don't make her an addict. Don't make her have problems. Just be patient.
Recently, my daughter wanted pizza for lunch, and I had to remind myself to be patient and not yell at her like I was yelled at as a child.

So I get, I make her. So I don't want pizza, I want chicken nuggets. You don't give me..ahhhh.
My daughter changed her mind about pizza and wanted chicken nuggets instead, but it was frustrating because I had already made the pizza.

I feel that in my asshole. Do you understand like that causes me to be so anxious. It goes through my body. I'm not even kidding. It's like raping me with those fucking ahhhhh.
The frustration and anxiety from dealing with my daughter's tantrums can be a physical sensation and feels like it's attacking my body.

So then it kept going. I swear to God she kept changing her mind. I want grilled cheese mama, I want grilled, I'm like, I wanted a boy, you know, I'm saying. Shut the fuck up. It's so it's so much.
My daughter kept changing her mind about what she wanted to eat, and it was overwhelming and frustrating.

I remember my first Zoey, my first born, my mother would sit with her. I swear to God she was too weeks old, two weeks old. And she would be like, can you say, mama?
When my first child was just two weeks old, my mother would try to get her to say 'mama.'

Can you say, mama? Can you say, mama? Who can say mama, who can say, two weeks old. Who can say mama, Who
My mother kept trying to get my two-week-old baby to say 'mama.'

You want to see my daughter's response? She was brilliant. I knew she was brilliant from 2 weeks old, I swear to God. Ahahahh. Can you say, mama? Can you say mama? Can you say mama? Ahah. Can you say anything? What's wrong with you?
My daughter didn't say 'mama' at two weeks old, and I found it amusing and impressive that she wouldn't say anything at all.

I was afraid she was just gonna turn around and be like, I can't say mama bitch. I love yelling because I'm so angry. I'm so, my mother wasn't around a lot. It's why I eat more. I just feel like I'm trying to fill this hole. This mom hole, it sounds so bad.
I was afraid my daughter would say something sassy like 'I can't say mama, bitch,' and I know that I can be prone to anger because of issues with my own mother. This has led to overeating and feeling like I'm trying to fill a 'mom-hole' in my life.