So Am I
Lana Del Rey Lyrics

I left my city for San Francisco
I decided to leave my hometown and move to San Francisco.

Took a free ride off a billionaire's jet
I hitched a ride on a billionaire's private jet without having to pay for it.

L.A, I'm from nowhere, who am I to love you?
Being from nowhere, I question my right to love and connect with the city of L.A.

L.A, I've got nothing, who am I to love you when I'm feeling this way and I've got nothing to offer?
Feeling empty and lacking, I wonder if I have any right to love and yearn for L.A in this state.

L.A, not quite the city that never sleeps
L.A isn't exactly the city known for its non-stop activity and restlessness.

Not quite the city that wakes, but the city that dreams, for sure
It's a city that's known for its dreams and aspirations rather than being awake and lively.

If by dreams you mean in nightmares
However, these dreams can sometimes turn into nightmares.

L.A, I'm a dreamer, but I'm from nowhere, who am I to dream?
As a dreamer without a specific origin, I question my right to have dreams in L.A.

L.A, I'm upset, I have complaints, listen to me
Feeling upset and dissatisfied, I want L.A to hear and understand my grievances.

They say I came from money and I didn't, and I didn't even have love, and it's unfair
People falsely assume that I had a wealthy background, but the truth is I lacked both money and love, which is unjust.

L.A, I sold my life rights for a big check and I'm upset
I'm disappointed and regretful for selling the rights to my life story for a substantial sum of money.

And now I can't sleep at night and I don't know why
I find it difficult to sleep at night without understanding the reason behind it.

Plus, I love Zac, so why did I do that when I know it won't last?
Despite my love for Zac, I question why I made certain choices that I know won't have a lasting impact.

L.A, I picked San Francisco because the man who doesn't love me lives there
I chose to move to San Francisco because the man I'm in love with resides there, even though he doesn't reciprocate my feelings.

L.A, I'm pathetic, but so are you, can I come home now?
Feeling pathetic, I find solace in the fact that L.A has its own flaws and weaknesses, and I seek to return home.

Daughter to no one, table for one
As someone without parental figures, I often dine alone.

Party of thousands of people I don't know at Delilah where my ex-husband works
I find myself in social gatherings with countless unfamiliar individuals at Delilah, the place where my former spouse is employed.

I'm sick of this, but can I come home now?
I'm tired of this situation, and I desperately want to return home.

Mother to no one, private jet for one
Being without children, I have a private jet all to myself.

Back home to the Tudor house that borned a thousand murder plots
Returning to my Tudor-style house that has been the setting for numerous murder plots.

Hancock Park, it's treated me very badly and resentful
My experience in Hancock Park has been negative and has left me feeling bitter and resentful.

The witch on the corner, the neighbor nobody wanted
Referring to an unpleasant individual living nearby who is disliked by everyone.

The reason for Garcetti's extra security
This person's presence is the cause of additional security measures taken by Garcetti.

L.A, I know I'm bad, but I have nowhere else to go, can I come home now?
Although I acknowledge my flaws, I have nowhere else to turn to and desperately seek to return home to L.A.

I never had a mother, will you let me make the sun my own for now, and the ocean my son?
Having grown up without a mother, I yearn for L.A to allow me to have a deep connection with the sun and the ocean.

I'm quite good at tending to things despite my upbringing, can I raise your mountains?
Despite my disadvantaged background, I possess the ability to care for things, so can I nurture and protect L.A's mountains?

I promise to keep them greener, make them my daughters, teach them about fire, warn them about water
I assure L.A that I will preserve the mountains' greenery, treat them like my own daughters, educate them about fire safety, and caution them about water hazards.

I'm lonely, L.A, can I come home now?
Feeling lonely, I implore L.A to allow me to return home.

I'm writing from the Golden Gate Bridge
I'm currently writing this from the iconic Golden Gate Bridge.

But it's not going as I planned
Things aren't unfolding according to my expectations.

I took a free ride off a billionaire and brought my typewriter
I hitched a ride with a billionaire and brought my typewriter along.

And promised myself that I would stay but
I had made a commitment to myself to remain in San Francisco, but...

It's just not going the way that I thought
The circumstances are not unfolding as I had imagined.

It's not that I feel different, and I don't mind that it's not hot
The issue isn't that I feel out of place, and the cooler weather doesn't bother me.

It's just that I belong to no one, which means there's only one place for me
The underlying problem is that I don't have a sense of belonging, which leaves me with only one place that truly feels like home.

The city not quite awake, the city not quite asleep
I refer to L.A as a city that is in between being fully awake and fully asleep.

The city that's still deciding how good it can be
L.A is a city that is still exploring and discovering its potential for greatness.

And also
In addition to the previous thoughts, I want to express...

I can't sleep without you
I find it difficult to sleep when you're not with me.

No one's ever really held me like you
No one has ever embraced me in the same way that you do.

Not quite tightly, but certainly I feel your body next to me
Although not holding me tightly, I can still sense your physical presence beside me.

Smoking next to me
We smoke together in close proximity.

Vaping lightly next to me
We enjoy vaping together in a gentle manner.

And I love that you love the neon lights like me
I adore the fact that you, like me, appreciate and enjoy the vibrant glow of neon lights.

Orange in the distance
We both appreciate the orange hues visible in the distance.

We both love that
Both of us share a fondness for that aspect.

And I love that we have that in common
It brings me joy that we share this common interest.

Also, neither one of us can go back to New York
Both of us are unable to return to New York for various reasons.

For you are unmoving
You have no intention or desire to go back.

As for me, it won't be my city again until I'm dead
In my case, I don't consider New York as my city anymore unless death separates me from L.A.

Fuck the New York Post
Expressing disdain or disregard for the New York Post.

L.A, who am I to need you when I've needed so much, asked for so much?
Considering all the needs and demands I've had, I question my right to require anything from L.A.

And what I've been given, I'm not sure yet
Uncertain about what I have received so far and its true value.

I may never know that either until I'm dead
The complete realization of what I've been given may only come to me after death.

For now though, what I do know
However, for the time being, I am aware that...

Is although I don't deserve you
Despite not feeling worthy of L.A's presence and love,

Not you at your best and your splendor
Not experiencing L.A at its finest and most magnificent state,

With towering eucalyptus trees that sway in my dominion
Including the majestic eucalyptus trees that dance harmoniously within my realm,

Not you at your worst
Nor encountering L.A at its lowest and most difficult moments,

Totally on fire, unlivable, unbreathable, I need you
When the city is ablaze, uninhabitable, and the air is unbreathable, I still yearn for L.A to be by my side.

You see, I have no mother
It's important to understand that I grew up without a mother figure.

And you do
In contrast, L.A has the privilege of being a mother city.

A continental shelf
L.A represents a vast continental shelf, symbolizing its grandness and foundation.

A larger piece of land from where you came
A bigger territory that nurtured your existence.

And I?
On the other hand, I am...

I'm an orphan
An individual without parental care or guidance, like an abandoned child.

A little seashell that rests upon your native shores
A small and insignificant seashell that finds solace on the familiar shores of L.A.

One of many, for sure
Among countless others who share a similar condition.

But because of that, I surely must love you closely to the most of anyone
However, because of my unique circumstances, I am capable of loving L.A more intensely than anyone else.

For that reason, let me love you
Due to this justification, please allow me to express my love for you.

Don't mind my desperation
Please disregard any sense of desperation in my affection.

Let me hold you, not just for vacation
Permit me to hold you not solely for temporary pleasure but for a deeper connection.

But for real and for forever
In a genuine and everlasting manner.

Make it real life
Transform our interaction into a substantial reality.

Let me be a real wife to you
Allow me to fulfill the role of a dedicated wife for you.

Girlfriend, lover, mother, friend
I aspire to become your romantic partner, lover, confidant, and nurturing presence.

I adore you
I hold deep affection and admiration for you.

Don't be put off by my quick-wordedness
Please don't be bothered or discouraged by my tendency to speak rapidly or impulsively.

I'm generally quite quiet
In general, I tend to be reserved and silent.

Quite a meditator, actually
Furthermore, I am an avid practitioner of meditation.

I'll do very well down by Paramhansa Yogananda's realization center, I'm sure
I am confident that I would thrive in the vicinity of Paramhansa Yogananda's spiritual center for self-realization.

I promise you'll barely even notice me
Rest assured, you'll hardly be aware of my presence.

Unless you want to notice me
Unless, of course, you desire to acknowledge and pay attention to me.

Unless you prefer a rambunctious child
Unless your preference leans towards an energetic and lively individual.

In which case, I can turn it on, too
If that's your preference, I can adapt and display a more vivacious personality.

I'm quite good on the stage as you may know
As you may already know, I excel in performing on stage.

You might have heard of me
You could be familiar with my work or reputation.

So either way, I'll fit in just fine
In any case, I am confident that I will integrate well into the environment.

So just love me by doing nothing
Instead of actively showing love, simply allow your love to manifest naturally without any deliberate actions.

And perhaps, by not shaking the county line
Additionally, refrain from causing any disturbances or disruptions in our relationship.

I'm yours if you'll have me
If you are willing to accept me, I am fully dedicated to you.

But regardless, you're mine
However, regardless of the circumstances, you will always belong to me.