Human
N.e.m.e.syS Lyrics

Walk into the courtroom feeling like I have returned from the warzone
I feel worn out and battle-weary as if I've faced a great deal of hardship and conflict.

Had a rough day so Imma keep my face low Having no say, cuz all of em said so SHUT UP
I'm going to keep a low profile today since I have no control over anything; there's no point in speaking up when others are making all the decisions.

Better get lost thoughts, Imma sit and take notes Better get a new lens, nah Imma break those Better let my friends in, nah the doors closed Find a back door, psych that's a joke
I need to clear my mind and focus on observing and learning; I refuse to see things from a different perspective or open up to others since I'm feeling rejected and insecure.

Tripping to thinking like I'm walking to the end of it Lying like I'm independent of it Though I shouldn't wander, I wonder if I wanna be uncovered By the shame and covet the confidential
I'm questioning my direction in life and deceiving myself into thinking I'm self-sufficient; I'm hesitant to face the truth about my shameful secrets and desire to know others' secrets as well.

On that condition, I question the intention My reason for living, is met with indifference I'm feeling the pain and I'm feeling no different If I carry the shame, I don't show He's risen so smile
Given my current state, I'm doubting why I exist, since no one seems to care; I'm feeling nothing but misery, and even though I believe in a higher power, I'm refusing to show any joy or peace.

Kept with the offset, I'm about to upset the offense Who we got next Step into the office Gonna get to talking, while my hearts beating like a drumset Outta my chest
Despite being off-kilter, I'm determined to disrupt the status quo; I'm anxiously anticipating a confrontation; I'll be discussing things in private at a high emotional level.

Lock it in a box, gonna get to tossin I ain't about to let my heart out for others to profit Call me a prophet, Heads gonna pop and Flying in the air and never good at poppin
I'm going to keep my emotions under wraps instead of letting others take advantage of me; people will be shocked by my actions and react strongly, but I'm not used to handling such situations well.

Flying off the rails and never gonna stop it Can we please drop it This is for your benefit Gotta be held accountable to everything you ever said and did Let it settle in for the betterment of your adrenaline Lemme in, Lemme in, Lemme in
I'm about to go berserk and can't control it; please let go of this matter since it's in your best interest; you must face the consequences of your past actions and change for the better; let this realization sink in and allow me to participate in resolving it.

Playing pretend and He's playing the therapist Gonna end this now to save embarrassment Hiding the care and telling me to carry it Tearing me to shreds and calling me terrible, I'm hiding
I'm pretending to be someone I'm not while struggling with my mental health; I'm going to put a stop to this charade to avoid further humiliation; I'm concealing my emotions and being told to handle them on my own while being attacked and degraded, so I'm keeping a low profile.

Don't wanna be involved, don't wanna see the charge Don't wanna hear the call, of everything I'm not The higher that I stand the longer that I fall I play perfection like a barbie doll
I don't want to take responsibility or face the consequences of my actions; I don't want to acknowledge my flaws or change who I am; the farther I rise, the harder the fall; I'm trying to be flawless and unattainable like a toy doll.

So close to love, yet I feel so far I'm looking for applause and looking for awe I'm look for applause and looking for awe Tell me, is this really what I want
Despite being close to love, I'm still unfulfilled and distant; I'm seeking admiration and inspiration from others; I'm in search of applause and cheers, but I'm unsure if this is truly what I desire.

I walk as a complicated man Distraught as something I'll never comprehend So lost I'll never understand My thoughts are bringing me to the bitter end To the bitter end
I'm a complex and troubled individual; there are things that will always elude me and that I'll never make sense of; I'm completely uncertain and without direction; my thoughts are pushing me towards an unpleasant conclusion.

Sentenced as you guess it You played your part and now you listen I'm back from the grave with a vengeance I'm not hearing you say that you missed me
You guessed right; you're facing the consequences of your actions and must listen; I've returned with a grudge; I don't want to hear that you regret losing me.

Oh, your feelings hurt you can't ditch me Check what you learned and you will see No need to be so discreet I'm apart of you and you apart of me
Your emotions are hurt by the idea of losing me, but you can't leave me behind; reflect on what you went through and discover the truth; there's no need to hide anything since we're connected and inseparable.

You may have dug up your graves Released all your slaves Does not mean you need to be confident Don't even think for a second that you are unstoppable Hope is impossible, you are a prodigal son Prodigal son, feeling he's done
You may have corrected your past mistakes and let go of your burdens, but that doesn't mean you should be complacent; don't believe for a moment that you're invincible; your hope is gone, and you're like the biblical prodigal son who feels defeated.

This is your testament Failing to see that your feelings are desperate You are so out of your element I be the only one that you can level with Endangerment of the mental statement I'm slow to embrace it cuz I'm talking in phases And I'm facing the faces Saying and playing and pushing the blame And painting the same picture of pain on the window pane That I'm wanting to break Can never be safe Asserting to dominate Certain to say that I'm the one who states It's not for debate I'm a stay in my own lane Don't care if I wind up a sucky no name
This is your declaration of faith; you can't see that you're in dire emotional straits; you're out of your comfort zone and can only confide in me; it's mentally dangerous; I'm hesitant to accept the truth since I'm taking things one step at a time, and I'm encountering many individuals who are shifting blame and causing pain; I want to break free from this monotonous cycle of suffering, but it's impossible to be safe; I'm confident in my ability to prevail and declare my thoughts with certainty; there's no need to argue; I'll stick to my path regardless of the outcome.

Ran outta fire so its time to get the propane It's no game, though shame Pulls up telling me I'm so fake And I just might break Cuz I'm gonna be human for the rest of my days I'm gonna be human for the rest of my days I'm Human
I've lost my enthusiasm, so it's time to ignite my passion through other means; it's not a game, but my sense of shame keeps telling me I'm a fraud; I might break down if I continue trying to be perfect and flawless; I must accept my faults, as I'm only human and will always be.