In 2008 Sadistik made his name with the provocatively fearless debut album "The Balancing Act." This record has been heralded by many critics as "hip hop's answer for winter albums" (SputnikMusic.com) for its fearlessly emotional potency because "after you are done listening to [it] you feel as though you have the world's strongest drug in your veins." When this sound was combined with the collaborations with Rhymesayers recording artist Mac Lethal and Vast Aire from Cannibal Ox fame, it becomes clear why so many have considered this to be an underground classic. Following the release of "The Balancing Act" was the release of the music video for the single titled "Searching for Some Beautiful" which was accepted by MTVu and well-received by fans and new listeners alike.
Following the success of "The Balancing Act" was 2010's operatic opus "The Art of Dying" with Chicago-bred producer Kid Called Computer. Again displaying his relentless knack to stray from rap music's norms, Sadistik and Kid Called Computer opted to create a conceptually unique album more akin to progressive rock than what is accepted as hip-hop with "beautifully married gloomy progressions with [...] gorgeous chaos in the music" (RapReviews.com). Whether it be the grandiose live rock crescendo of "Save Yourself" or the nearly 8 minute epic tale of school violence in "Bed of Flowers," Sadistik showed that he was not aiming to meet expectations but to shatter them into as many pieces as possible with a sound that "goes inside of you and eats it's way out from the inside [...] by being beautiful and painful at the same time" (GutsandGrog.com).
Sadistik's efforts are not limited to recordings, however, as he can be found performing his intimate yet intensely energetic shows around his home of Seattle and around various cities in the United States as well as internationally. In 2011 alone, Sadistik has independently toured in nearly every region of The United States as well as nine countries in Europe including: Germany, Switzerland, Denmark, France, and Austria. Sadistik has also shared the stage with hip hop icons such as: Tech N9ne, Slaughterhouse, Bone Thugs N Harmony, D12, Cage, Eyedea & Abilities, The Grouch, Zion I, etc.
Currently, Sadistik is preparing his official follow up to "The Balancing Act" titled "Flowers for My Father" that will be released on Fake Four Records, as well as finishing a collaborative album with Emancipator and penning his first poetry book.
For all booking and press inquiries please contact: Sadistikpro@gmail.com.
Angel Eyes
Sadistik Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Try to find a place in lines that I embrace
While I strive to find a balance between a time and space
In a microphone.. When Im soundin intense
I feel like 'Pac on his hospital bed, countin his breaths
And they still say, Ill never blow on the mic
Unless I spit a gimmick with some clever jokes cuz Im white
Im forced to listen to critics just chatter they teeth
And my closest friends stumble as they mumble and doubt me
While I try to hold the world as it crumbles around me
Feel my lungs close, strain harder for breaths
As the broken dreams I have match the heart in my chest
And the pressure builds… But without a release
I know that ya hope floats, but its out of my reach
Im tired of the masks that we wear (if only)
You saw my true self youd be scared (to know me)
But now I finally see what I love is worthless
Beautys skin deep, but its just a surface
My shoulders are breaking and my focus is hazy
Plus my teeth are chipped from biting all the bullets that you gave me
In the form of lies, and I mistook it as honest
Took the good with the losses, til the good was just lost, its
Hard to hold the burdens until my shoulders bleed
I was forced to flee, until I learned to fly with broken wings
Across the visions of feelins and all this violent livin
Of a fucked up system insistin that I should try to fit in
But now I can see Im unrelated to you
Cuz I took off the mask that suffocated the truth
(If Life) could even worsen, (Then Id) release my burden
(And try) to be the person, (Who writes) and speaks in perfect
(Advice) for people hurtin, (Who cries) and fiends for nursing
(And time) would be asserted, (To find) a decent purpose
(But I) am weak and burdened, (I cry) and seek alertness
(In life) to be the person, (Whos lines) are seen as perfect
(I try) and seem so worthless, (That life) has demons lurkin
(That I) defeat the purpose, (And Life) is seen as worthless
Watch everyday just pass me by
Slowly corroding and acting fine
Suffocating on this mask of mine
Til I run out of breath and I cant survive (x2)
Through my angel eyes I see the devil's truth
Through my angel eyes I see the devil's truth
Through my angel eyes I see the devil's truth
Through my angel eyes I see… (x2)
I need to get a piece of inhibition (First!)
And speak another piece of bitter vision (Words!)
And get a better syndicate of vindicated few
And I better never let another mitigate the truth
Cuz Im the better, never get a flow with flaw
Better with the letters, veteran know it all
Talk a lot in a song, better hold em off
I thought I was lost, never fold or fall
If I could ever get a minute trying to be
My life independent when Im dying in peace
I might get a sentiment I write to a beat
My mind of a veteran, trying to see
That lifes beautiful, suitable to let go
Of anything and Ill just survive through it all
Inner lines intertwined, my mind is livin life
Grippin mics, livin life in trife its live and die
The first verse of Sadistik's song "Angel Eyes" is a deeply introspective and emotional reflection on the struggles the artist faces in his music career and personal life. Sadistik speaks to the pressure he feels to conform to critics' expectations, particularly because of societal expectations related to his race. He describes the burden of carrying broken dreams and the masks we all wear to hide our true selves from others. The verse ends with a powerful declaration of his commitment to self-discovery and self-expression, even in the face of life's challenges.
The chorus of the song is particularly poignant, with Sadistik using the metaphor of suffocation to describe the feeling of being trapped in a false self that is slowly killing him. He recognizes that he needs to break out of this cycle in order to truly live and see the world for what it is, including the dark and painful truths that are often hidden from us.
Overall, "Angel Eyes" is a powerful meditation on the struggle to be true to oneself and to find meaning and purpose in a complex and often painful world.
Line by Line Meaning
Try to find a place in lines that I embrace
I am searching for a comfortable spot in my struggles
While I strive to find a balance between a time and space
I am trying to harmonize between my past and future
In a microphone.. When Im soundin intense
I become passionate when I express myself through music
I feel like 'Pac on his hospital bed, countin his breaths
I feel near death, gasping for air like Tupac in the hospital
And they still say, Ill never blow on the mic
Critics claim I will never be successful in the music industry
Unless I spit a gimmick with some clever jokes cuz Im white
Critics say that my only chance at success is if I rap with humorous gimmicks because of my race
Im forced to listen to critics just chatter they teeth
I am compelled to endure critics who only talk negatively
With all their bullshit opinions like it matters to me
I am presented to opinions that are irrelevant to me
And my closest friends stumble as they mumble and doubt me
Even my allies have lost faith in me
While I try to hold the world as it crumbles around me
Despite everything falling apart, I try to hold it together
Feel my lungs close, strain harder for breaths
I feel suffocated and struggle to breathe under pressure
As the broken dreams I have match the heart in my chest
My shattered ambitions mirror the pain in my heart
And the pressure builds… But without a release
I feel increasingly stressed without a way to let it out
I know that ya hope floats, but its out of my reach
Although there is hope, I cannot grasp onto it
Im tired of the masks that we wear (if only)
I am frustrated with the façades that people put on (if only)
You saw my true self youd be scared (to know me)
If you saw my real self, you would be frightened to know me
But now I finally see what I love is worthless
I now realize that what I love is of no value
Beautys skin deep, but its just a surface
Physical beauty is superficial and does not reflect who a person really is
My shoulders are breaking and my focus is hazy
I am carrying too much weight and losing sight of my goals
Plus my teeth are chipped from biting all the bullets that you gave me
I have been hurt so much that I have physically damaged myself
In the form of lies, and I mistook it as honest
I accepted the lies I was told as the truth
Took the good with the losses, til the good was just lost, its
I accepted the bad with the good, until there was no good left
Hard to hold the burdens until my shoulders bleed
It is painful to bear the heavy weight until it is unbearable
I was forced to flee, until I learned to fly with broken wings
I had to escape and leave behind the broken parts of me to make myself better
Across the visions of feelins and all this violent livin
Despite the negativity in the world, I see past it and feel something better
Of a fucked up system insistin that I should try to fit in
The corrupted society urges me to conform
But now I can see Im unrelated to you
I can observe and conclude that I am different from the society that tries to change me
Cuz I took off the mask that suffocated the truth
Since I stopped hiding who I really am, the truth no longer suffocates me
(If Life) could even worsen, (Then Id) release my burden
If my life gets worse, I will let go of my struggles
(And try) to be the person, (Who writes) and speaks in perfect
I will try to be someone who writes and speaks perfectly
(Advice) for people hurtin, (Who cries) and fiends for nursing
I will offer guidance to those in distress, who are crying and seeking help
(And time) would be asserted, (To find) a decent purpose
I will take the time to discover a solid reason for being alive
(But I) am weak and burdened, (I cry) and seek alertness
I am still struggling with my problems, and I cry out for awareness
(In life) to be the person, (Whos lines) are seen as perfect
I want to be perceived as someone whose words are flawless
(I try) and seem so worthless, (That life) has demons lurkin
I attempt to appear unworthy, and negative thoughts haunt me
(That I) defeat the purpose, (And Life) is seen as worthless
I feel like I am failing, and life seems meaningless
Watch everyday just pass me by
I watch each day go by unnoticed
Slowly corroding and acting fine
I am deteriorating, but I try to hide it
Suffocating on this mask of mine
This mask that I wear suffocates me
Til I run out of breath and I cant survive (x2)
Until I can no longer handle the pressure and pain
Through my angel eyes I see the devil's truth
Despite my faith, I see the evil in the world
I need to get a piece of inhibition (First!)
I must overcome my limitations first
And speak another piece of bitter vision (Words!)
Then, I must express myself even more through harsh truths and words
And get a better syndicate of vindicated few
I need to surround myself with those who support and respect me
And I better never let another mitigate the truth
I must never let anyone undermine the truth
Cuz Im the better, never get a flow with flaw
I am superior and flawlessly skilled
Better with the letters, veteran know it all
I excel with words and am experienced in many things
Talk a lot in a song, better hold em off
I say a lot in my music, and I back myself up
I thought I was lost, never fold or fall
Though I was lost, I remained strong and never collapsed
If I could ever get a minute trying to be
If I had any time to myself, I would try to improve
My life independent when Im dying in peace
I want to live freely and die peacefully
I might get a sentiment I write to a beat
I might express my emotions through music
My mind of a veteran, trying to see
My thoughts are experienced, and I try to see beyond the surface
That lifes beautiful, suitable to let go
Life is worth cherishing, and one must let go of the negative aspects
Of anything and Ill just survive through it all
I will survive despite any obstacles that come my way
Inner lines intertwined, my mind is livin life
I am constantly pensive and thoughtful
Grippin mics, livin life in trife its live and die
I am holding onto my microphone and living through challenges; it is a matter of life or death
Contributed by Lucas D. Suggest a correction in the comments below.