The Exception to Everything
Sadistik Lyrics

Beautiful and innocent, suitable and militant
Despite being perceived as innocent and suitable, I possess a militant nature.

Are scripted on the walls of the cubicle I'm living in
The contradictory qualities I possess are confined within the walls of my isolated existence.

I'm different, if you take away that I'm gone
My uniqueness defines my existence, and without it, I cease to exist.

A heart on my sleeve, with a razorblade jacket on
I openly display my emotions, vulnerable and yet protected by a layer of pain and self-destructiveness.

In Babylon I would hold my breath and listen close
In this chaotic world, I navigate cautiously, paying close attention to the whispers of death and despair.

To the ghosts of death the ocean kept when the winter froze
The ocean holds the ghosts of those lost to death during the cold winter, a haunting reminder of mortality.

Skin and bones, is what my burly bag of flesh will hold
My physical body is merely a vessel, holding nothing more than skin and bones.

Digesting hope with another thirty packing Lexapro
I rely on medication to numb my emotions and consume my hope, drowning it in a sea of pills.

Discomposed, from all the fuckin' ghosts that follow me
I am constantly unsettled and haunted by the lingering presence of the ghosts of my past.

Across a battered path of shattered glass and broken arteries
I navigate through a treacherous journey, filled with broken pieces and scars, both physical and emotional.

It's oceanography the way the blood accumulates
The flow of blood within me resembles the study of oceanic processes, symbolizing the accumulation of pain and suffering.

I'm rude awake, with one eye open like Homer's Odyssey
I am abruptly awakened to the harsh reality of life, always vigilant and cautious like Homer's character in the epic poem.

And honestly, I don't need to make a difference
I have no desire to leave a lasting impact or change the world.

I just want to live my life without a fee to pay admission
All I desire is to exist freely and authentically, without the burden of societal expectations or restrictions.

Apathetic bliss in these apathetic days
I find solace in the numbness and indifference that fills these monotonous and uncaring times.

Cuz I'm apathetic mixed with the pass aggressive ways
My apathy is combined with a passive-aggressive demeanor, concealing my true emotions beneath a facade.

Anesthetic sprays from my tongue 'til the pain stops
I express my emotions through the use of anesthesia-like words, attempting to numb the pain within and find temporary relief.

I'm trying to figure out if this is blood or the raindrops
In the midst of my emotional turmoil, I struggle to differentiate between my own blood and the tears that fall from my eyes.

Love or a safe spot, think twice
Before seeking love or a sense of security, one should carefully consider the consequences and potential risks involved.

While I take another shot until the angels start to sing like...
I drown my sorrows and numb my pain with alcohol, seeking a moment of respite from my internal demons.

I've got a bone to pick with all these skeletons in closets
I have unresolved issues and grievances with the concealed secrets and past experiences that haunt me.

They're breaking down the barriers, embellishing my losses
These hidden truths and painful memories slowly erode the barriers I've built, amplifying my sense of defeat and sorrow.

And under all the verses, I wonder if it's worth it
Beneath the surface of my art and expression, I question the value and worth of my creative endeavors and personal journey.

And whether it's irrelevant, the elements are constant
Despite the potential insignificance, the elements of my existence, both internal and external, remain persistent and unchanging.

No sleep and apparently a pen
I am kept awake, sleepless, driven by a pen and my need for creative expression.

Is the perfect combination for the therapy again
The act of writing becomes therapeutic, providing an outlet for my emotions and a means of self-reflection.

So I scribble in a pad 'til it carries me within
I pour my thoughts and emotions onto paper, allowing them to carry me into a realm of introspection and self-exploration.

All the ripples in my past that I carefully attend
I acknowledge and reflect upon the consequences and effects of my past actions, tending to the ripples they have created.

When all I got to do is take a look into my pedigree
To find a sense of identity and purpose, all I need to do is examine my lineage and personal history.

And mentally amenities will make another memory
By engaging in positive mental practices and cultivating healthy habits, I will create new meaningful memories.

The penalties are lending me a bitter loss of energy
The consequences and setbacks I face drain me of vital energy, leaving me with a bitter sense of defeat.

A destiny of inhibition until my wings will set me free, now
I am fated to be held back and inhibited until the day I can finally break free from my restraints and soar.

No time for regrets, keep moving forward and hope for the best
There is no room for dwelling on the past, I must continue progressing and maintaining optimism for a brighter future.

Its all gone, I'll say so long and never let go of what I hold in my chest
Even when everything seems lost, I will bid farewell to the past but never release the emotions and memories I carry within me.

This is dedicated to the dedication left behind
This song serves as a tribute to the commitment and perseverance that remains after one's departure or absence.

Me, a dedicated mental patient on a bed of knives
I am a metaphorical mental patient, willingly subjecting myself to psychological pain and turmoil, lying on a bed of knives.

I meant to find a certain person worthy of current purpose
My intention is to discover someone who is deserving of my current state and existence, finding meaning in their presence.

Searching through the epitaphs to make the dead alive
I explore tombstones and written tributes in an attempt to bring the deceased back to life through my memories and words.

And edify as I watch all the faces walking by
Observing the people passing by, I aim to elevate and uplift their spirits through my own experiences and insights.

Painted with perplexing looks, abrasions and awkward eyes
These individuals display expressions of confusion and discomfort, marked by scars and hesitant gazes.

Showing me to modify broken wings I've taught to fly
They serve as a reminder to adapt and repair my own damaged wings, which I had once taught how to soar.

Often I go and dream of a place across the sky
Frequently, I escape into my dreams, envisioning a distant realm beyond the sky.

Where I reside and dark breaks the light
In this imagined place, darkness triumphs over light, reflecting my affinity for the hidden and mysterious.

Never stop moving, a sharks way of life
Continual motion and progression is vital, reminiscent of a shark's relentless and instinctual survival instincts.

Set still as sparks drape the sky
Despite the constant movement, I find moments of stillness and awe as sparks illuminate the night sky.

And debt builds, a heart pays the price with
The accumulation of emotional debt takes its toll on the heart, resulting in a heavy price to be paid.

Love, pain, sun, rain, (I remember when my mother used to lie to me)
Through the memories associated with love, pain, sunshine, and rain, I recall instances when my mother would deceive me.

hate, grace, blood stains (and I remember when my father used to lie to me)
Similar recollections arise with regards to hate, grace, and the enduring marks of blood, reminding me of my father's lies.

Life, death, time, rest, (and I remember when my teachers used to lie to me)
My experiences with life, death, the passage of time, and the necessity for rest also trigger memories of my teachers deceiving me.

this is my breath (and then they wonder why I have no faith in this society)
These memories and experiences form the very essence of who I am, leading to my lack of faith in the society that perpetuated these lies.

I can't find stability I lack the right ability
The absence of stability in my life stems from my inadequacy and inability to possess the necessary skills and attributes to attain it.

To act inside humility and magnify the will in me
Instead of embodying humility, I struggle to act in a modest manner, choosing instead to amplify my stubborn will.

Every time I try to be, satisfy or feel at ease
Each attempt I make to conform, find satisfaction, or achieve a sense of tranquility is met with disappointment or dissatisfaction.

I'd rather be an actor and to act than try to deal with things
I prefer to play a role and pretend, rather than confront and cope with the complexities and challenges of reality.

Until I fall and I hit the rock bottom
I will continue to evade reality until I inevitably reach my lowest point, completely broken and defeated.

And I grieve with the leaves 'til I pray its not autumn
In my state of despair, I mourn alongside the falling leaves, desperately hoping that it is not the metaphorical autumn, symbolizing the end of life.

The blood starts to draw and it falls from the wrists
In moments of deep despair, the act of self-harm becomes enticing, leading to the flow of blood from self-inflicted wounds on the wrists.

When the slits are across and I ball up a fists
The self-inflicted cuts span across the wrists, causing me to clench my fists in pain and frustration.

So call it a gift but I'm not living for the present
Despite labeling it as a gift, I am not living for the current moment, instead attempting to find solace in self-inflicted pain and despair.

When it all becomes the past and I can't listen to the questions
As time passes, my experiences become memories, making it increasingly difficult to face the questions and uncertainties of the present.

Isn't it a blessing when I feel like I'm alive
Amidst the darkness, I consider it a blessing to experience brief moments of feeling truly alive.

And I don't have to be another fucking cynic for a second
During these moments of vitality, I can momentarily escape my cynical nature and embrace a more hopeful perspective.

Even though I've never called it perfect
Despite acknowledging its imperfections, I have never deemed my life as perfect.

When I die, I want to know it all was worth it
When I eventually pass away, I desire reassurance that my life and the choices I made were meaningful and worthwhile.

I want to know that I tried my best with
To find peace in death, I long to be aware that I gave my utmost effort in every aspect of my existence.

Embracing every moment that I was blessed with
In the pursuit of a fulfilling life, I aspire to fully embrace and appreciate each and every moment I have been fortunate enough to experience.

Every life, every death, every time that I wept
I seek solace and meaning in acknowledging the existence of every individual, every loss, and every moment of sorrow I have endured.

Every moment, every person, every line that I said
Each fleeting moment, every individual I have encountered, and every word I have spoken hold significance and contribute to the tapestry of my life.

Every night, every day, every time every place
Every single night, day, occasion, and location I have existed in are vital components in shaping my journey and defining who I am.

Every kiss, every wish, every side of the maze
Every kiss shared, each desire formed, and every twist and turn encountered within the complex maze of life impact and mold my experiences.

Every cut, every bruise, every love that I'd lose
Every physical and emotional wound endured, along with every love that ultimately fades away, leave an indelible mark on my being.

Every time that I broke and the times that I grew
The moments of shattering and breaking serve as opportunities for growth and development within my personal journey.

Every drop of rain that these clouds would spew
The tears shed, symbolized by the falling rain, have the ability to cleanse and nourish my spirit, aiding in my growth and self-discovery.

To help form the man that I amounted to
These experiences, both painful and joyful, collectively shape and mold the person I have become.

And I'm thankful, that I am who I am
Despite the hardships and challenges I have faced, I feel gratitude for the person I have become and the unique individuality I possess.

And I've been where I've been and I came out grateful
Having journeyed through various experiences and locations, I emerge from each one with a sense of gratitude and appreciation for the lessons learned.

When it's finally time to make an exit
Upon the arrival of my final moments, when it is time for me to depart this world.

Just know, that I don't regret a single second
I want others to understand that I have no regrets about any of the choices I made or the moments I experienced in my lifetime.

This is the exception to everything
This song serves as the rare exception, defying the norms and expectations associated with typical expressions or narratives.

This is the exception to everything (x6)
The reiteration emphasizes that this song stands out and deviates from conventional patterns or themes in music.