99 Problems
Tay Watts Lyrics

If you’re having girl problems I feel bad for you son
I sympathize with you if you’re having problems with women

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one
I have a lot of problems, but they are not related to women

I got the rap patrol on the gat patrol
I have protection from both music critics and people who might want to harm me

Foes that wanna make sure my casket’s closed
People who want to see me dead

Rap critics that say he's 'Money Cash Hoes'
People who criticize my lyrics for promoting materialism and misogyny

I'm from the hood stupid what type of facts are those
I’m from a tough neighborhood, so the criticism doesn’t hold up

If you grew up with holes in your zapatos
If you grew up poor

You’d celebrate the minute you was having dough
You’d be happy once you started making money

I’m like fuck critics you can kiss my whole asshole
I don’t care about music criticism

If you don’t like my lyrics you can press fast forward
You can skip past my songs if you don’t like them

Got beef with radio if I don’t play they show
I have a problem with radio stations for not playing my music

They don’t play my hits well I don’t give a shit SO
I don’t care if my music isn’t successful on the radio

Rap mags try and use my black ass
Magazines try to exploit my race for profit

So advertisers can give em more cash for ads... fuckers
Advertisers use my image for their own gain

I don't know what you take me as
I don’t know how you perceive me

Or understand the intelligence that Jay-Z has
You don’t understand my intelligence

I’m from rags to riches nigga I ain't dumb
I came from poverty and made it big, I am not stupid

Hit me
Start the song over again

The year is '94 and in my trunk is raw
It’s 1994 and I have illegal drugs in my car

In my rear view mirror is the mother fucking law
I see the police following me

I got two choices yall pull over the car or
I can either stop or try to outrun the police

Bounce on the double put the pedal to the floor
Try to escape by speeding away

Now I ain't trying to see no highway chase with jake
I don’t want to get into a high-speed chase with the police

Plus I got a few dollars I can fight the case
I can afford to hire a lawyer or pay bail if necessary

So I... pull over to the side of the road
I stop the car on the side of the road

And I heard 'Son do you know why I'm stopping you for?'
The police officer asks me why he pulled me over

Cause I’m young and I'm black and my hat's real low
The police officer pulled me over because of racial profiling

Do I look like a mind reader sir, I don't know
I don’t know what I did wrong

Am I under arrest or should I guess some mo?
I don’t know if I’m being arrested or not

'Well you was doing fifty five in a fifty four'
The police officer thinks I was driving too fast

'License and registration and step out of the car'
The police officer wants me to give him my identification and get out of the car

'Are you carrying a weapon on you I know a lot of you are'
The police officer thinks I might be armed

I ain't stepping out of shit all my papers legit
I am not getting out of the car because I have all the correct paperwork

'Do you mind if I look round the car a little bit?'
The police officer asks if he can search my car

Well my glove compartment is locked so is the trunk and the back
I refuse to let him search the car without a warrant

And I know my rights so you gon' need a warrant for that
I know that he cannot search my car without probable cause or a warrant

'Aren't you sharp as a tack are some type of lawyer or something?'
The police officer is surprised by my knowledge of the law

'Or somebody important or something?'
The police officer thinks I might be a celebrity or someone important

Nah I ain't passed the bar but I know a little bit
I'm not a lawyer, but I know enough about the law to protect myself

Enough that you won’t illegally search my shit
I know enough to prevent an unlawful search

'Well see how smart you are when the K-9's come'
The police officer threatens to use drug-sniffing dogs to search the car

Now once upon a time not too long ago
There was a time when I wasn’t rich or famous

A nigga like myself had to strong arm a hoe
I had to use force to control a woman

This is not a hoe in the sense of having a pussy
This is not a woman in the traditional sense

But a pussy having no God Damn sense, try and push me
This is someone who is foolish and tries to challenge me

I tried to ignore him and talk to the Lord
I tried to stay calm and pray

Pray for him, cause some fools just love to perform
I pray for him because some people like to show off and cause problems

You know the type loud as a motor bike
These people are loud and obnoxious

But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight
They might talk tough but won’t actually fight

The only thing that's gonna happen is i'mma get to clapping
I will resort to violence if necessary

He and his boys gon' be yapping to the captain
He and his friends will tell on me to the police

And there I go trapped in the kit kat again
I’ll end up back in trouble with the law

Back through the system with the riff raff again
I'll go through the legal system and deal with criminals again

Fiends on the floor scratching again
Drug addicts will be scratching themselves again

Paparazzi's with they cameras snapping them
Photographers will take pictures and sell them to the media

D.A. tried to give the nigga the shaft again
The District Attorney is trying to unfairly prosecute me again

Half-a-mil for bail cause I’m African
My bail is set at a high price because of my race

All because this fool was harrassin' them
All of this trouble was caused by the foolish person attacking me

Trying to play the boy like hes saccarin
Trying to act sweet and innocent

But ain't nothing sweet 'bout how I hold my gun
I am not a sweet person, I am willing to use violence to protect myself

I got 99 problems but being a bitch ain't one
I have many problems, but being weak or submissive isn’t one

Hit me
Start the song over again

You're crazy for this one Rick
Rick Rubin, the producer, is being praised for this song

It's your boy
The song is being attributed to Jay-Z